Diplomatic Impossibility
by Numbuh Phenon
Summary: In which Numbuh Infinity is reminded why "diplomacy" and "Sector V" don't exactly go together.
1. Chapter 1

**_Common Mistranslation_**

* * *

Even as a Kids Next Door agent, there was something a little boring about the hum-drum-day-to-day duties you were asked to perform. Wake up, eat breakfast, file a report, go fight an adult, save some children, file a report about the adult, watch cartoons, file another report about the cartoon, go to bed, rinse and repeat the next day. Although, there was a slim chance another report had to be filed somewhere in the time between sleep and morning.

Now, there was nothing completely wrong about this schedule, per say. Depending on who you asked, it suited a lot of people just fine. But some days, an operative began hoping for _some _form of variety to liven things up. And after foiling several wicked plots of the Delightful Children for the fifth week in a row, Sector V was one such sector that was practically begging for a change in pace. Seriously, they'd consider Toiletnator duty just to see what would happen.

On second thought, they weren't _that_ desperate. Yet.

Thankfully, something did in fact pop up that required that certain touch the five had. Even more thankfully, it had nothing to do with the Toiletnator. In fact, it was much better than they could have hoped for. A flashy joint-mission with a fellow KND sector, off in some far off country they had never even heard of? They were off like a rocket before Numbuh 65.3 could even start the debriefing.

So that's where the children were off to this fine day; a foreign land, in a far away place, where the icy winds raged, and clouds blocked out the sun itself. And it tended to be cold. Very cold.

Well, they _had _requested for something _different_.

In the northern, snow-packed plains of the small country, a large mass of metal was currently plowing its way through the icy mush and chilly flurries. A mix-matched vehicle with the body of an RV, snow tires of a monster truck, engines of a jet-plane, and a snow plough mounted on the fender. The vehicle was specially designed to traverse the harsh terrain and safely carry the cargo inside.

"All systems check out," Numbuh 2 informed from behind the wheel. The pudgy boy raised a mug of hot coco to his lips, and sighed in content as he focused on the trail ahead. "Should be there in no time."

Off to the side, relaxing in a cubby, Abby rolled her eyes behind her magazine. "Woulda been there already if you had stopped and asked for directions."

The inside of the camper was just what you would expect of a normal RV, only with a few modifications. Abby sat off to the side in a cozy kitchen corner, only the table blinked and flashed with numerous navigational equipment. The oven and sink had been torn out, replaced instead with a small armory filled with various 2x4 technology and clothing suited for the cold climate. Hoagie himself sat up front in the driver's seat, surrounded by familiar levers and switches along with a hot coco dispenser. The sweet, wonderful hot coco dispenser. Best upgrade ever, he would tell himself from time to time.

"I don't need directions, who do you think is driving here?" he scoffed, peeping over his shoulder, looking a tad miffed. Abby said nothing, only waving off the boy as she returned to whatever column she was that had caught her eye. Hoagie sighed, turning back to the trail. Stupid people, always mocking his keen sense of direction. However, that thought was forgotten as he hastily swerved to the right. "ELK!"

_SCREEEECH!_

Snow and ice flew everywhere as Hoagie avoided the animal that just jumped out of nowhere. The sudden jerk in movement had disastrous effects for those inside the camper. Abby was thrown out of her seat, sent flying straight into the armory. Wally, who had been dozing off in the bunk beds, was awoken from his slumber as gravity and force worked together to slam him into the adjoining wall. And near the back, there was a slight crash, followed by a splash, and someone screaming in shock. And what of Hoagie?

Well, he was mostly fine. Thank goodness his mom hammered lessons of "always wear your seat-belt" into his head.

"Ugh, that was too close," he shakily said. Nervous of what reception he'd meet, he quickly shifted to auto-pilot as he slowly turned to face the rest of the crew. "Um, heh heh, my bad, guys."

Abby slowly rose up, knocking off weapons and blaster that had toppled all over her. She adjusted her cap as he glared down the boy. "Has your licensee been renewed recently?"

"Of course it has! Numbuh 10-2 just hasn't sent back the paperwork."

Wally slowly peeled himself off the floor, his face in a perfect fusion of grogginess and confusion. "Did we die?"

"Oh come on guys, it could've happened to anyone!"

"Make sure it doesn't happen again."

The three looked towards the the bathroom door where the voice had come from. After a moment, the lock clicked, and the door was swung open. Out poured a wave of water, followed by a soggy Numbuh Infinity. Somehow, the KND Diplomat managed to keep a collected presence despite being soaking wet with a strand of toilet paper hanging off his heel. And then there was that _smell… _

"The natives here are very twitchy when it comes to their elk," the boy rattled off, "and the last thing we need is for you to cause a political incident before we even start the mission."

"Don't sweat it, sir," Hoagie laughed as he turned back to the steering wheel, "political incidents are our specialty!"

"That's what I'm afraid of."

"Uh, he was probably talkin' about _avoiding _political incidents, sir," Abby quickly covered. The last thing they needed to do was upset Infinity, especially since she had no idea if he was still sore about what happened at his bounce house birthday party. Oh Zero, _the bounce house birthday party_. "Ain't dat right, _Numbuh 2?_"

Hoagie seemed a tad confused until he caught Abby's intense look. "Oh, yeah, yeah, sure. What did I say?"

Numbuh Infinity's face never wavered, but Abby would bet all her chewy pellets he was rolling his eyes behind those shades. "Personally, had this been an actual assignment requiring diplomacy, I would have requisitioned a sector with a bit more…tact."

"Tact, smact," Wally flouted, now fully awake. "There's a reason _we're_ being sent in to deal with this rather than a buncha pansy dorks in lame suits. We're super experts at this kind of mission. No one knows what to do better than we do," he stated, proudly. He then frowned, a certain question ringing in his mind. "Hey, what are we actually doing 'ere anyway?"

"To put it bluntly, we're on a rescue mission," Numbuh Infinity informed, not even hiding his condescending tone. "Your team is operating on a joint-mission to rescue and escort a very influential ally of ours in this region."

It took a moment for it all to sink in for Wally before he frowned again, a new question waiting on his lips. "Then why are _you _here? How the crud would you be of any use? What'cha gonna do? Say a buncha smart-alecky mumbo-jumbo?"

"Pretty much, yeah," Hoagie answered, earning a groan from Abby. Yeah, they really needed some work on that whole "tact" thing.

Infinity seemingly ignored him. "I'm here because I am needed to translate between your sector and the local Ubekian Kids Next Door."

"U-becca-_wut_?"

"No, _U-beki-an_. We are currently within Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan, a small country in the north. It's relatively unheard of, so it comes of no great shock that you haven't heard of it." Wally gave the boy a disbelieving look, but shrugged it off. "It's on the map, you'd find if you actually looked."

"Yeah," Hoagie added, "If you're looking with a _magnifying glass_."

Wally only scratched away on the back of his head, maybe hoping the irritation would kick start his brain. "So, why haven't I ever heard of this Ubaca-rock-a-shock-stan before?"

"It isn't exactly renowned for its stability. Their government is a decentralized parliamentary system with three hundred-forty thousand different political parties, including the Hubba-Bubba Cabinet and one llama with a spitting problem. The current government was founded about," he paused to check his watch,"twenty to twenty-five minutes ago after the nation's three hundred and fifth revolution so far this year."

"Man, I'd hate to move to this bonkers country…"

"It's not so bad, I hear the new llama Prime Minister has a natural talent for foreign policy."

"Right…" Wally muttered. It's official, he was _never_ going to get into politics. There was never any real chance of it, but it never hurts to reaffirm your stances every now and then. "So about this rescue mission…"

"We're here to rescue the daughter of a Ubekian royal family," Abby explained simply, "Third-Born Princess Yal'see Tipuan."

"Ugh! A girly-girl _Princess_? Why can't we ever rescue someone cool?"

Abby shook her head at his excepted response. "Whatever. Point is, she's been captured, and we gotta save her royal behind or things here in 'Beki-stan are gonna go south. Fast."

"Can't be that bad, can it?"

"Most definitely," Infinity confirmed. "One of Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan's major exports is none other than ice cream, and the royal family Princess Yal'see hails from controls one of the largest ice cream trading empires in the entire region."

"Whoa, really?"

"Yes, really," Infinity snipped, becoming annoyed with Wally's constant barrage of questions. "Numbuh 2, have we arrived?"

In response to his words, the RV began to drop in speed. The vehicle came to a slow halt, with Hoagie facing the others with a pleased look. "We just hit base camp now, and I totally nailed that parallel parking."

If Hoagie was expecting some sort of praise, he was would be sorely disappointed as Numbuh Infinity brushed him off. The collected operative reached for his coat off to the side, and merely buttoned himself up before heading outside. "The rest of your sector is somewhere within the camp. I kindly ask you to refer to them for any new developments."

Hoagie and Wally only glared at the boy's back as he trotted off. "Gee, what a saint he is."

"You two hush," Abby scolded as she put on her own winter-wear. "He probably still hasn't forgiven us for what happened at his birthday party."

"You mean the one with the bounce house and–"

"Let's just go!" Abby hastily interrupted as she jumped out into the snow. Noting her distaste on the subject, the two decided best not that think anymore on _that_ gruesome, yet oddly hilarious, incident and soon followed lest they get left behind.

The three kids huddled together when they felt just how cold it was outside. The small Kids Next Door base camp consisted of several igloo huts and dozens of children scurrying about, no doubt preparing for the upcoming operation. Looking at their follow operatives, Sector V felt severely under-dressed for the occasion.

"These guys look like walking puffballs," Wally commented as a Ubekian passed by. They might as well have been wearing swimsuits compared to what some of these kids had on.

"C-Can you b-blame them?" Hoagie stuttered. It did not take long for the weather to get to him. "I-It's FREEZING! Give m-me a f-few more seconds, and I b-bet I'll start s-sneezing snot-cicles."

After hearing Hoagie complain, Abby's hand unconsciously started rubbing at her nose. "Wonder how the natives stay warm."

"D-Don't you know? T-They wear _flake _jackets for protection. Ha ha!"

Abby was far too cold to waste any annoyance over Hoagie's petty wisecrack. The girl shuffled within her coat as she scanned the area for a familiar face. When she saw Numbuh Infinity talking with one of the Ubekian operatives, she sighed, then began trudging over to him. "C'mon, let's go find out where Numbuh 1 and Numbuh 3 are. The sooner we're done with dis, the better."

Numbuh Infinity was focused on a topic of great importance when Abby, Hoagie, and Wally just walked right up to him. Clearly peeved, he apologized to the girl before facing three fifths of his displeasure. "I thought we were clear that you were to report to your sector leader."

"Yeah, but we can't do that if we don't know where he is, doofus," Wally snapped. "What did'ja expect us ta do, walk around like lost idiots?"

To this day, Infinity would never know how he stopped himself from answering that question truthfully. "I see. I suppose I might as well handle some introductions while you're over here." He stepped to the side, allowing them to see the girl he was conversing with. "This is Numbuh 4-Below, second-in-command of the Ubekian sector."

"Hey, how's it going?" Hoagie greeted. Then, something strange happened. Numbuh 4-Below gasped, snarled, then slapped poor Hoagie out of nowhere. "YEOW! W-What is your problem!"

"And _that's_ why you need me to translate," Numbuh Infinity said. "Some words in their language mean different things here. 'Hey' sounds very similar to a certain, eh, derogatory term here in Ubeki."

"Oh…o-_oh_!" Hoagie forgot about his anger when he was made aware of his faux pas. He twiddled his thumbs as he bowed his head to Numbuh 4-Below. "Uh, sorry about that."

_SLAP!_

"OW! What did I say _THAT_ time?"

"Just let _me_ do the talking," Infinity groaned. He coughed into his hand before addressing the Ubekian girl. "Utu ma ga-nene. Ju'sr Numbuh 2 got'laj osi. Unu osi."

Numbuh 4-Below scoffed. "Numbuh 2 re'tkiki hu-boon-do."

Hoagie blinked. "What did she say?"

"She says you are an idiot."

Abby chuckled as she teasingly elbowed the boy. "Real smooth there, lover-boy."

Infinity continued on. "Yu'no ka, goi? Go tyu Numbuh 1 and go tyu Numbuh 3?"

"Numbuh 1 halag Numbuh 3 lo'loi pum tu'kani."

"Ah," Infinity nodded. "Numbuh1 and Numbuh 3 are at the north pole, dancing with chicken-dragons."

"…What?"

"Er, um, maybe I mistranslated," Infinity fumbled. "Uh, coul'dal repa'tet?"

Numbuh 4-Below rolled her eyes before pointing to the biggest igloo. "Ini gohal Chu-io, hu-boon-do."

"Well, we better get in there," Hoagie said. The trio then took off to regroup with the rest of there team, Numbuh 4-Below close behind. Numbuh Infinity paused for minute, and sheepishly began to follow. It was just a common translation error. That's all. Won't happen again.

They pushed the flap of the igloo aside, and stepped in to find the entire place what set up like a command tent. Near the back wall was a large map of the area. On it were several key location either highlighted or crossed out, alongside of a doodle of a Rainbow Monkey smiley face. In the center of the igloo was a large table, split into two halves. One side had several Ubekian operatives fussing over a pile of documents, and other carried to faces familiar to the newcomers.

Numbuh Infinity and Numbuh 4-Below moved towards he Ubekian, while the three of sector V greeted their friends. "Sup?"

Nigel looked up from his information at Abby's call. "Ah, good to see you made it in one piece, team. And you picked up Numbuh Infinity as well. Were there any complications I need to know about?"

"Nah," Abby waved off. She wasted no time in grabbing her chair and propping her feet up on the table. "Easiest part of the whole mission, baby. Numbuh 5 was more worried about somebody stoppin' us at the border."

"The ride over, however…" Hoagie trailed off, his eyes narrowing as they landed on Infinity. " Well, between you and me, an angry chihuahua with flees has better roadside manners than Numbuh Infinity."

Nigel spared the diplomat a sideways glance, curious. "He's still mad about his bounce house birthday party?"

Abby suddenly became put off as they ventured back into uneasy territory, "Look, dat's all well and dandy–"

"I still don't get what got 'im so upset," Wally spoke aloud, "Was it the part where we busted the bounce house, or when Numbuh 5 tripped up and smashed the cake all over his mum's–"

"–but we got more important things ta worry about!" she finished gingerly, slapping her hand over Wally's trap before he could finish. Her eyes related the quick message of 'shut-up and never speak of it again' to the blond boy before returning attention to her bald leader. "So, what did we miss?"

Nigel was about to speak before he was interrupted by the bouncing girl at his side.

"Aw, you should have been there Numbuh 5, we had so much fun!" Kuki lightly giggled, eager to relate her exploits up until this point. "The funny sounding kids over there told ghost stories –I think, I couldn't understand a word of what they were saying– we got to eat this chocolate that melts and freezes at the same time, Numbuh 1 drew pictures of the Princess, and I got to pet a baby polar bear!" Suddenly, her face lit up as she reached behind her, producing an odd looking plushie of some sort. "And Numbuh 4-Below was nice enough to give me this! Ooohh, isn't it just _adorable_? They don't have Rainbow Monkeys here, but this is just as megaly huggarific!"

Wally, true to form, didn't even hide his disgust. "Leave it to you ta be the first one to find the stupidest things in the middle of cold-cruddy nowhere."

"Ahem," Hoagie coughed to garner everyone's attention. "That's super guys, but Numbuh 1 was talking about the Princess?"

"Thank you, Numbuh 2. Good to know _someone_ is focused on the task at hand," Nigel grumbled, sending a pointed glare in Kuki's direction. The girl only smiled and ignored him, whether she was aware of him or not. "While we are just now acting on it, I had already been anticipating Princess Yal'see's abduction. Now that I've gathered all possible information, I've managed to find out where she's being held, and the motive behind such a nefarious plot."

"Numbuh 5's guessing it's got somethin' to do with her family's ice cream business."

"You couldn't be anymore correct, Numbuh 5. As you might all know, Princess Yal'see comes from a powerful ice cream trading family here in this country. Her pro-kid agenda, along with her allegiance with the Kids Next Door, has insured ice cream is fairly sold to kids all across the region. Unfortunately, this has made her family a target of the Tasty Taste Ice Cream corporation."

"You mean those loser adults who only sell ice cream to other adults? Figures. They always hafta try and ruin anything good for us kids!"

"Precisely, Numbuh 4." The blond jumped at the voice different to Nigel's, and looked up to see Numbuh Infinity, along with the rest of the Ubekian sector, had gathered around Sector V's end of the table. "Thankfully, relations between the Tipuan family and Tasty Taste are tense, all due in part to Mr. Boss offending the heads of the family during a meeting to buy them out."

"What did he say to make them so mad?"

"He said, 'hello'."

Numbuh 2 nervous cast a glance over towards Numbuh 4-Below, remembering his earlier screw-up. The girl growled in return, causing him to quickly shift his eyes away. "I take it there was a, uh, mistranslation?"

"Yes, and Tasty Taste have been tripping over themselves to make up for it ever since," Nigel said as he opened up file. "But wretched, adult businessmen like that never back down easily. Right now, Princess Yal'see is the only thing keeping her family from kicking our forces out of here. So as you can imagine, Tasty Taste want her taken care of. And they have!" He flipped through the documents, pulling out a picture of their enemy. "Meet First-Born Prince Yul'sha Tipuan."

Abby scrunched her nose at the image of the royally dressed lad. "A teenager? Numbuh 5 shoulda known."

"I have solid evidence that Prince Yul'sha is eating out of the pockets of Tasty Taste. So just like the butt-kissing adult sympathizer he is, he's agreed to hold his own sister hostage. That's why we have to save her, ASA-NOW!"

"But what's with all the urgency?" Hoagie asked. "Things here have been a bit more rushed then your standard rescue operation."

"We don't have the luxury of time," Infinity intervened, "There's a reason the Prince waited until now to imprison his sister. I've learned from the Ubekian operatives here that the Tipuan family is holding a summit with other families and tribes. Without the Princess there to speak on our behalf, the Prince will no doubt try to undermine the Kids Next Door's importance in the area; breaking off our alliance, and allowing Tasty Taste to move in and fill in the gap."

"Go-tus ka no-nu," a bulky Ubekian raged, slamming his fist on the table, "Yul'sha iuah kuyra, ini go'nom ta'chi'ka kak!"

Kuki was amused by his accent. "There they go telling ghost stories again!"

"No," Infinity tersely said, "he said the prince is a big stupid-head, and we shall rain down flaming eggs on his monkey-turkey leg."

Abby rose a skeptic brow. "Really? He said _that_?"

"Well, no, but I'm sure whatever he _did_ say was very insulting!"

"Numbuh Infinity," Nigel spoke, starting to question the boy's claim as a translator. "Can you manage to translate between our teams to form a solid plan?"

"O-Of course!" he answered. Regaining his composure, he turned to the Ubekian. "Opa neiw jal so'gani?"

"Uk," the Ubekian leader nodded. He leaned over the map, motioning towards a fortress that was heavily circled. "Re'shali kuin hal du-gan. El nino kas uga rout jun'bur."

"He says he's ordered his forces to mobilize just outside the compound the Princess is being held in. They can manage a frontal assault, but he's not confident they can completely break through."

"That's where we'll come in," Nigel supplied. "Tell him if he can draw most of their forces out, my team will have a clear window to get in through the back. With precise action, we can get the Princess out of there during chaos."

Infinity turned back to the Ubekians, "Toiu Sector V go-roa ta'nuk. Pol-see ba, Yal'see neki, no kin."

This seemed to satisfy the children. "Uk."

"It's settled then," Nigel said as he stood, "We're getting the Princess out of there and making sure she speaks at that summit."

Wally smashed his fists together. "'Bout time. All this sitting around and planning crud is for the nerds."

"Al Naor Maka!" the Ubekian shouted, "Hu'chu No-opa!"

Sector V shared a collective blink, then looked to Infinity expectantly. The diplomat sighed, but indulged them. "He said, Kids Next Door, Battle Stations."

This was followed by a collective, "_Oooooh._"

* * *

Far from the KND base camp, nestled in the nook of snow tussled valley, was a rugged fortress of metal and stone. A compound composed of traditional Ubekian buildings stood tall in the center, being patrolled vigorously by large men suited in heavy armor and toting glinting steel swords. The Prince's personal royal brigade, no doubt.

Tall, bricked walls shielded the inner compound from the outside world, along with guards standing right outside the main gate. One such guard was minding his own business, briefly daydreaming about the warm shores of Hawaii, when something caught his immediate attention.

There, not even ten meters away, were two small children having some petty snowball fight. The innocence of youth never ceased to amaze him. Still, the Prince had been very specific in describing what would happen to them if the Princess was harmed, so he was not going to take any chances. That meant the two children were extremely too close for his liking.

Muttering, he stomped through the snow, approaching the children. The moment his mouth opened to tell them off, he found it would soon be filled with bone chilling slush. The guard sputtered in shock as the culprits ran off into the distance. There was a tiny little voice in his head that warned him against chasing after them; telling him countless time he had a job to do and didn't need to waste any time on harmless children. What was to be gained by pursuing them? Absolutely nothing.

Sadly, common sense is a dying breed.

He stomped up the hill. He stomped up that hill with extreme conviction. Nobody throws a snowball at him and gets away with it! As he peaked over the rather steep incline, his arm snapped out, preparing to give the children a very firm lecturing. Two little pipsqueaks tossing snowballs up and down in their hands didn't intimidate him…

…The legions of children _behind_ them, wielding odd looking weapons, catapults and spears, however, were a completely different story. One he highly doubted was going to end well for him.

Wait, were those ravenous looking polar bears some of the kids were mounted on?

Yeah. This was definitely not going to end well.

Inside the compound, everything was relatively peaceful. The Princess was secure in her room, the guards had not seen hide or tail of a bandit or rebel skirmish since they got there, the hot coco was warm, and there was even something worth watching on the breakroom television. Life was good. A few guards mingling outside were even calling this post the easiest job they had ever been assigned.

They would soon begin to rethink that as a giant snowball dropped from the sky, demolishing an entire platoon in no time flat. There was an uncomfortable silence, but that was soon broken by sounds of battle outside the walls, and the furious roars of polar bears.

It had gone from being "the best assignment ever", to "the worst job of all time" in less than a second. Though that time was impressive, it didn't hold a candle to the world record.

The guard from before managed to scramble back inside the compound gates before they closed, thanking his speed and his father's drive to push him to his limits when he was younger. His uniform was in tatters; half of it being covered in mustard, and another half been torn apart from a polar bear that got a little close for comfort. He was lucky to have survived at all.

But there was no time for pause. The odd army of children was approaching, and if they didn't divert all attention to it, they would easily overtake the compound in no time. The guard ran through fort, alerting everyone of the impending enemy. The guards were quick to assemble, and soon began pouring forces out beyond the walls to combat this new threat. The Princess had to remain secure at all costs.

Our favorite guard reached the back courtyard, motioning everyone to get off their hind ends and help repel the attack.

During his frenzied state, a brief notion crossed his mind. They were sending almost everyone to the front line, and as more guards rushed past him, he couldn't help but notice how empty the back gate was. An empty back gate, meant an undefended back gate. Surely the children weren't trying to…

No. No that was ridiculous. Sure, the children had formed some small militia, began attacking in full force –with _polar bears_– but they weren't smart enough to take advantage of an open backdoor. That would be giving them too much credit.

Cue the monster-truck/RV hybrid suddenly plowing through the back gate.

Seriously. What the _heck_ was going on today?

The guard and his remaining comrades jumped out of the way as the machine charged through, skidding to a halt right smack dab in the middle of the courtyard. They didn't have long to let this oddity sink in, for the roof of the RV extended. A mounted turret slowly rose into view, a chubby boy not foreign to his land sitting behind the trigger.

Hoagie smirked as his loosened his fingers. Once he was certain the tanks were full, his hands gripped the controls, and his smirk slowly grew into a grin that would make any certified madman proud. "Hey fellas! I don't know about you guys, but I think it's getting a little _chili _in here!"

The guards couldn't understand a word of what came out of Hoagie mouth, but they were pretty sure whatever he was saying was pretty lame.

Without warning, molten hot streams of Hoagie's Aunt's famous award winning chili con carne spewed from the turret nozzles. The small force of men was easily overcome by the attack, with some falling flat on the backs or running around blindly with piping hot chili in their eyes. The pilot just laughed it his skill. Those video game marathon were really paying off.

While Hoagie manned the turret, the doors of the RV opened, and seven other small bodies stormed out into the fray.

"Let's go!" Nigel ordered, his teammates rushing past him. As Abby, Wally, and Kuki advanced towards the backdoor of the main building, Nigel turned back towards Numbuh Infinity and 4-Below. "Numbuh 4-Below, make sure Numbuh Infinity and Numbuh 2 keep the RV secure for getaway. We'll be in and out before they know what hit them!"

The girl nodded while taking out an advancing guard with her M.U.S.K.E.T. "H'anak lo'pa sel, chu no ga'oko non, Numbuh 1."

"She said, may you praise the mad god, and eat smelly foot cheese," Infinity translated. Then he realized what he just said. "W-Wait, that's not right."

"Yeah, you work on that," Nigel said wryly. The boy equipped dual-wield S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R's, and joined his team on the offense.

"G-Good luck!" Infinity yelled after confirming with 4-Below. "She said _good luck_! I know what I'm doing!"

Sector V was on the move as they made their way to the building. Once he had gained enough ground, Wally planted himself down and began firing his heavy weapon. It didn't matter how many guards came his way, it only took one solid bowling ball each time to take them down. He grit his teeth as he hurried to reload, for it seemed they kept coming back quicker than before.

Thankfully, before they could swarm him, Abby came up from behind, trapping a squad of men with a net from her T.A.N.G.L.E.R. The foes struggled against their bindings, but they were too cramped and tight to formulate any escape. Abby motioned for Wally to follow, and the two slowly moved forward, clearing the way.

Nigel slid under a guard, before leaping up and taking him down from behind. From his crouched position, he quickly rose his S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R's and swatted away two idiots who thought they were clever. Before the bald lad could get on his feet, he was suddenly dog-piled by a group of desperate soldiers. They assumed they had him, but one click of his heels, and he rocketed up from the trap, shaking off anyone who tried to hold on afterwords. With that taken care of, he quickly moved up to catch up with the others.

While all this was going own, Kuki was performing her own measures to help the team out.

"And there. It's perfect!" Kuki cheered, extremely giddy that her masterpiece was finished. The bubbly raven haired cutie had done the impossible and managed to build…a life size snow sculpture of Joaquin, one of the hamsters.

It made sense when you thought about it. Maybe.

"I need to take pictures! First of one by itself, then one with all of us, then one of with all of us and the Princess, and then–heeey! Uh oh," Kuki gasped when an angry guard sliced through her sculpture. The girl quickly got up and scampered away, the guards taking chase.

The little girl weaved around, and hopped over several attempts by the guards to put her down. For once, she was fully aware of how close they were to taking a few inches off the top with every swing. Yet, this fact didn't seem to trouble her at all. Kuki only rolled out of the way, and took refuge inside a guard tower that happened to be left open. Taking the child for the idiot, the men rushed inside blindly, swinging their swords and releasing their battle cries.

However, once the final guard entered the tower, Kuki twisted around the door and immediately slammed it shut; lowering the wooden bar to lock the brutes inside. The girl only dusted off her hands, and skipped off to join her friends while the guards hopelessly beat against the door.

"Alright everyone, get into position," Nigel ordered as he pressed himself against the wall. Abby immediately came to his side, hunkering down to sheathe her T.A.N.G.L.E.R and beginning prepping another 2x4 invention. Kuki finally appeared to cover the wall opposite of Nigel, and Wally knelt down in front of the door, aiming his weapon. Once he was certain everything was in place, he nodded in Abby's direction. "Now or never, Numbuh 5."

"Got'cha, boss," Abby responded. The girl reached into her coat, and pulled out a grenade. The small weapon was an overstuffed ice-cream sandwich with tiny, blinking ice-packs ducked taped to the base of it. Abby expertly tore the wires connecting to the ice-packs, causing the grenade to let off an icy mist. She counted the three in her head, and swung her arm back. "GO!"

* * *

**Kids Next Door: C.R.E.A.M.I.E.**

**C**reamy. **R**efreshment. **E**xplodes. **A**nd. **M**akes. **I**ced. **E**nemies.

* * *

"Fire in the hole!" Wally shouted, launching the largest bowling ball he had at the door. The ball crashed through the wooden structure, leaving the doorway wide open. Once it was clear, the boy rolled next to take cover next to Kuki, while Abby quickly chucked the C.R.E.A.M.I.E grenade inside. The four held their heads low, and waited.

Sure enough, a crackling explosion followed, cutting off any screams from those caught in the blast. Taking that as their signal, the children rushed inside to complete their mission.

Inside the building was a frozen, ice-cream wonderland. The C.R.E.A.M.I.E grenade went off without a hitch, turning the floor into a slick, icy surface. Any guard that was unlucky enough to get caught in the radius of the explosion was instantly turned into a strawberry, ice-cream statue. As oddly marvelous the sight was, the kids did not have time to take pride in it. The explosion had instantly roused guards from the rest of the building and brought them to their position. The men charged into battle, some slipping up on the slippy floor the moment they entered the room.

"Take this, ya stupid Eskimos!" Wally roared as he fired another shot. The bowling ball flew true through the air, and the gaggle of guards it sailed towards could not move away in time. The moment the shot connected and sent the entire group flying, Wally pumped his fist, boasting his efforts. "Strrrrr-ike!"

"Numbuh 5," Nigel called over the battle. "Numbuh 4 and I will hold the ground floor. You and Numbuh 3 get up stairs and get the Princess out of here!"

"Sounds like a plan, man," Abby agreed. She and Nigel tossed their respective weapons towards each other; the bald boy now using the T.A.N.G.L.E.R for crowd control and Abby now having twin S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R.'s for something a little more up close and personal. "Let's go, Numbuh 3!"

"Coming!" Kuki hummed merrily. She did a quick twirl around two dizzy guards, breaking away from her figure eight formation and staking over to the stairs to meet with her teammates. "Bye guys!" As soon as the brightly dressed girl left, the guards fell over, the room spinning all around them.

"Ku nas!" a guard called as he rallied his comrades. There had been startling disturbances around the base, one right after the other. But when they heard the resonating explosion downstairs, they know they had to spring to action.

Once the squad had formed behind him, the guard turned to charge in downstairs and take the intruders from their back flank. They would never expect that. Kind of like how he didn't expect the foot getting acquainted with his face.

"Hiya!" Abby grunted as she landed from her flying kick. The guards reacted to their captain's quick defeat beside sprinting forward and bringing their swords down. The lithe girl was able to maneuver out of their line of attack, their swords imbedding themselves in the floor. Abby didn't waste a second, and brought up her S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R's to gift the two with a round of splitting headaches. "Heh heh, too slow, suckas."

While Abby chuckled to herself, one lone guard held his breath as he silently approached her. Once he was close enough, he raised the blunt end of his sword in order to knock the brat unconscious. And he would have, had Kuki not jumped out in front of him.

"Ah ha!" Kuki laughed with a wicked grin, spraying streams of silly string into the guards eyes.

"Ahhhhh!" he cried in agony. He dropped his weapon and flitted about frantically, shocking the girls somewhat. The poor man continued to scream and rub at his eyes, the searing pain reducing him to blindness. Eventually, he tripped over the body of one of his fallen comrades, and proceeded to fall out an open window. "_Ahhhhhhhhh!_"

"Oops…" Kuki gasped. Slightly guilty, Kuki stuck her head out the window and called out to comfort the guard who had his face buried in the snow below. "Sorry!"

"Forget him," Abby barked. The girls then faced the extravagant doorway the guards did a horrible job of defending. The two shared a silent nod, then proceeded to kick the door down and hold up their weapons. "FREEZE!…Eh? "

"Mar nekel, Ms. Nesbitt?" said the guard seated at a tiny, pink table in front of them, dressed in a frilly outfit, handing out cups of imaginary tea to a group of stuffed animals. Before he could continue the charade, he finally took note of the two new arrivals. "…"

"…" There was an awkward silence as Abby lowered her weapon. "Um."

"Oh my gosh! A tea party!" Kuki squealed, seated at the table in a flash. The guard was so stunned at how quick she moved, he didn't have time to form a rational thought. Kuki, however, had already manged to get into character and was passing plates around between the dolls. "Would you like more cupcakes, Mr. Floppy-bottms? Oh, of course I didn't forget about you, Ms. Doe-Eyes, it's just that you told us you were on a new slim, eat-nothing-but-dirt diet. Now where is the–Mrs. Raggle Muffin! That's just _terrible_! Hehehehe!"

"Well," Abby commented as she strode up to the table, "Dat didn't take long."

The guard looked between the two girls, no idea as to what was even going on anymore. "Eh?"

Abby looked up to the man, slightly –well, a lot more than slightly– put off by his dress-code. "Er, Princess Yal'see?" she asked hesitantly. The guard frowned at the mention, and his hand went to his sword.

"Hm?"

The tiny little noise from the other side of the room was enough to put a halt to all activity. The three looked over from the tea party to see a young girl standing in the doorway. A short, blonde haired child with a pony-tail regarded them all carefully. Her regal fur dress and sliver tiara gave away her royal status, and all she held at the moment was a stuffed doll in her left hand, a plastic tea kettle in her right hand, and a confused expression on her face.

Princess blinked cutely at the two new girls. More servants to play, perhaps? She tilted her head slightly as she addressed them, "Eh, ma ne'l su?"

"Ah, _you're _Princess Yal'see," Abby said, enlightened. She turned back to the guard and gave him a dry look. "And you're just a weirdo."

"I finally get to meet the Princess!" Kuki cheered as she ran up to the royal daughter, bouncing on her heels as her mouth ran a mile a minute. "Hi! I'm Numbuh 3! It's soo nice to meet you! What's it like being a Princess? It must be hard running a kingdom, but I bet you get to do lots of super fun things; like ride ponies, dance with princes, and attend fancy parties where everyone raises their pinkies! Heey, speaking of parties, will you come to my birthday party? Oh please, it'd be so fun! We could even make it a pretend royal slumber party, except we don't have to pretend because you're–"

"Numbuh 3, why don't ya, uh, get back to the party. The tea's getting cold," Abby reasoned as she tried to calm to girl down. Kuki blinked, then gasped as she remembered she left the tea party unsupervised. Abby shook her head, then looked to the shaking Princess. "Don't worry girl, we're here to rescue you. That was Numbuh 3 being Numbuh 3. I'm Numbuh 5, second-in-command of Sector V." She noted the Princess still looked nervous, then realized she problem understand a word of what she was saying. "Uh, we're the Kids Next Door? _Kids Next Door_?"

"Keys nest doo?" the Princess slowly repeated in broken English. Her eyes filled with some comprehension as he roughly translated. "Al Naor Maka?"

"Uh, sure. Let's go with dat," Abby shrugged. Her eyes never leaving the Princess, she raised her S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R and quickly dispatched the guard with a cheap shot. "We'll explain it to ya later, just come with us, alright?"

"Uh, uk?" the Princess nodded slowly, a bit shocked at how the girl just knocked out the guard. Abby said nothing as she escorted the Princess out of the room…then returned five seconds later to drag Kuki away from the tea party.

"Numbuh 1!" Abby yelled as her group descended the stairs. "We got her!"

"Excellent!" he lightly praised before netting another group of brave guards. When Wally started playing defense, Nigel reached for his head-set. "Numbuh 2, status report."

"_Guys, we need to make like a turkey on Thanksgiving, and make ourselves scarce!_" came the rushed reply over the line, "_These adults are getting wise to our little distraction out front, and I'm down to a only few quarts of chili. If we don't get out of here now, we're gonna get swarmed!_"

"Fire up the engines, Numbuh 2. Numbuh 4! We've got the Princess, we're leaving!"

"Why so soon? I can take on these losers all day!" Wally chuckled. With a feral grin, he centered his sights on a poor unsuspecting guards coming out of the main hall. But his dreams of making the guards an extinct species was squashed when he heard the tell-tale, _click-click_ of an empty ammo cartridge. "Ah crud," he whined. The boy reluctantly dropped his weapon, and high tailed it out of there with the rest of them.

The children broke out into a mad dash when they re-entered the courtyard, Princes Yal'see following along like a lost puppy. The entire plaza had been reduced to an all-out war zone as more and more royal guards flooded into the area. Fed up with how slow she was moving, Wally lift the Princess over his shoulder, and ran to their getaway ride like his tiny, ten year-old life depending on it. The others were quick to follow his example.

"Hurry up!" Numbuh Infinity called out, meeting them halfway. The diplomat showed surprising skill with a S.P.I.C.E.R as he covered Sector V while they escaped. Once they were a jog away from the ride, he fell in step with them. "Where is Princess Yal'see?"

"Right here, are ya blind?" Wally growled from the rear. He grunted as the girl fussed again. This "save the princess cliché" thing was getting real old, real quick. "Tell 'er what's going on so she'll stop squrimin'!"

"Oh, yes, of course!" Infinity backpedaled so he was in Yal'see's line of sight, then he began to translate the situation best he could while under fire. "Baki manu somi. We'k, Al Naor Maka, sal demo chitty chitty b'anga b'anga."

"B'ANGA B'ANGA?" the Princess screeched. Then, in an amazing two seconds flat, the Princess went from meek and nervous, to wild and and rabid. She increased her efforts to escape Wally's grasp ten-fold; kicking his face, punching his shoulder, to even biting at his hair.

"OW! Geez lady!" he yelped. "_YEEOW!_ WHAT THE CRUD DID YOU SAY?"

"I-I only said we were the Kids Next Door, and we were rescuing her to take her back to the Tipuan summit! At least, I that's what I _meant _to say…"

Abby resisted the urge to slap some sense into the boy. "Where did you get your translator license? At the bottom of a Rainbow Munchie cereal box?"

Nigel's brow picked up an irritable twitch as he noticed the guards getting more desperate. They must have found out the Princess was in there company. "We'll straighten it out later, get her in the RV!"

From his seat in the turret, Hoagie chewed his bottom lip on concentration. These Ubekian soldiers didn't let up. Unfortunately for them, neither did he. But then fortunately for them, his chili ammo tanks chose that exact moment to run out of hot spicy soup. Upon seeing his friends getting overwhelmed, he lowered himself into the RV and scampered around to find some way to help them.

"Boss, Numbuh 5's not sure about you, but seeing the inside of a Ubekian prison is NOT on her bucket list!"

"Num-buh _Four!_" Nigel stressed, his collected visage slipping with each passing second they were not on back in the safety of the RV. "Move your butt!"

"What does it look like I'm doin'? It's this prissy brat's fault!" Wally raged, struggling to keep Princess Yal'see under control. "Hey, how much trouble do ya think I'd get in for knocking out a princess?"

"Yal'see!" one of the guards called out. The man motioned for the Princess as he and his subordinates approached the RV. "Cala mek! Cala MEK!"

"Uk!" The Princess glared at Wally, ramming her elbow into his noggin. The action was enough for him to lose his grip on her as he rubbed at his newest bump. Once she was free, she did the unthinkable and ran towards the guards.

"Why that stupid little pomp-tail of a–HEY!" he sputtered, realizing that she was getting away. "Are you NUTS?"

"Princess Yal'see!" Nigel yelled as he, Numbuh 4-Below, and Wally took off after her. "Come back!"

Back in the RV, Hoagie ran out the door, holding up an extra C.R.E.A.M.I.E grenade he found. "Everybody, take cover!"

Kuki glanced to where Princes Yal'see was on the field, saw what Hoagie was doing, and a rare look of panic spread over her face. Before it became too late, she attempted to stop him. "Numbuh 2, wait! DON'T–"

But her warning was worthless in the end. Before Hoagie had a chance to think his actions through, the grenade was already sailing through the air. Time seemed to slow down as it neared the ground. Princess Yal'see had just reached the squad of royal guards when the C.R.E.A.M.I.E grenade landed a foot shy in front of her. The young girl paused, having no idea what the strange item was. But the three operatives coming up behind did. All too well. They made a desperate leap for the princess, hoping to reach her before the grenade–

_BOOOO-SSSSSSSSLUSH!_

* * *

**A thank you to XxTheUnspokenTruthxX, whose messages gave me the motivation to write like a monster these last few hours. **

**Two or three parter. There's a lot more done, but I'm holding off for the ending. Expect the conclusion soon.**

**How long 'soon' is depends on your faith in me. XD**

**_Buh-bye,__ now~_  
**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Bad Businessman  
**_

* * *

The blast was a violent tidal wave of bone-chilling sherbert delight, knocking any who dared get close back a few dozen feet. The guards met a harsh fate. The grenade rendered them all as frozen statures, their faces eternally stuck with expressions of shock, confusion, and fear. Well, until they thawed out, at least. Then they just needed to worry about hypothermia.

"Oooh," Nigel wearily groaned as he sat up. He and his fellow kids-in-arms had fared far better, it seemed. He tore his sunglasses off his face, shaking stray bits of ice cream off, then turned to Numbuh 4-Below. The Ubekian commander slowly stood on her feet, her fur coat sprinkled with bits of sherbert. Since she was clearly alright, that only left two more unaccounted for. "Numbuh 4? Where are you?"

"Stupid grenade," Wally muttered, trying to stop that annoying ringing in his ear. Shaking his head, the young boy tried to stand up so they could get back to escaping. Well, he tried to. It felt like a hunk of ice of weighing him down. His hands swept over his eyes, rubbing away any excess ice cream to see clearer. When his vision returned, the poor lad nearly experienced a heart attack. "AAHHH!"

'Numbuh 4!" Nigel heard the girly cry of terror, and honed in on the source. As he neared the blond, his paced slowed as the scene before him came into focus. "Quit lying around on the job! We need to find…the Princess?"

"Get this thing off'a me! Get it–wait a sec," he paused mid-scream. Using all his might, he pushed the scary looking object off of him. He scurried away a safe distance, and was able to see the object that had scared the living daylights out of him was the princess herself. "What's the matter with you! I oughta pop you for scaring–I mean, _thinking_ you could scare me! 'Cuz I wasn't scared! That scream? It was a, er, reflex!"

"Princess?" Nigel ignored Wally's claims of denial and hurried over to the girl. He already had a thousand and one apologies and explanations prepared for Hoagie's little friendly-fire mishap, but after a moment, he doubted he would need any of them, because the girl wasn't responding to a word he was saying. "Princess? Princess! Oh great, Numbuh 4!"

"_What_?" Wally whined. This mission now officially blew chunks. Everyone had been yelling at him today, in _two _different languages. "I'm not the one who chucked a grenade outta nowhere!"

"Just grab her feet, and let's get out of here!"

Numbuh 4-Below was preoccupied with picking bits of ice cream shrapnel out of her fur coat. That was going to be _so _much fun to explain to her mother. However, her trance was broken when Numbuh 1 and his loud blond teammate rushed by…were they carrying the Princess? The girl didn't have much time to think about that, seeing as a dart whizzed past her cheek. It seemed the guards had upped to projectiles now. Okay, time to go.

"Come on, come on, come on!" Abby waved, willing her friends to get on board the RV faster. Kuki jumped in first, followed by Infinity. Numbuh 4-Below vaulted inside, and at last, Nigel and Wally trudged in, carrying…"What the–"

Nigel interrupted her question as he slammed the door on a guard's face. "Punch it!"

Hoagie, already secured in the driver's seat, didn't need to be told twice. Without any sign of warning, the boy stomped on the acceleration, sending hurdles of snow flying as the RV took off. The vehicle spun slightly out of control, caused some property damage by destroying a few valuable looking figurines, and crashed through the barricade as it sped out of the compound the way it entered.

"Well," Kuki breathed, "that was…fun?"

"Yeah," Wally sneered, "if by fun ya mean getting shot at, almost blown up, and yer hair pulled out by a nutty princess, then yeah, it was SUPER FUN!"

Infinity leaned on the counter as he took a moment to catch his breath. "Where _is_ the Princess? Is she safe?"

"Y-Yeah," Nigel gulped, "Of _course _she's safe! Why in the world _wouldn't_ she be?"

"Oh that's a relief, because for a second there, I thought she got caught in the explosion and something bad happened to her," Kuki giggled, extremely happy to know her earlier fears were misplaced. But her cheery demeanor was shaken when Nigel shot her a glare. "Um, what did I say?"

The sector leader began fidgeting as all eyes were on him. Just peachy, under the spotlight. Except he didn't want to be this time. "Well, she _is_ on board this vessel and she _is_ safe. Technically."

"_Technically?_" Infinity folded his arms as his brows furrowed. "Numbuh 1, in my line of work, 'technically' is a fancy way of saying 'I screwed up big time and you're so gonna kick my butt when I tell you what happened'."

"That's a rather choice way of putting it," the Brit slumped. "Look, she's…that is to say…oh fudge, take a look for yourselves!"

And that they did. The children pushed past the befuddled Numbuh 1 to the back of the RV where Abby sat attending to the princess of the hour. Princess Yal'see's body had been placed on the lower bunk bed, the royal child just laying there without the rebellious protest she gave the team earlier. In fact, she didn't seem to be giving _any_ type of protest at all. She was just laying there, stiff as a board.

That wasn't a good sign.

"Sweet Rainbow Monkey Mary," Infinity began to panic. "What's wrong with her?"

"Is she frozen?" Wally asked.

"Not frozen," Abby answered somberly. "Well, not on the outside, at least."

"'Not on the outside'? This isn't the time to start speaking in riddles, Numbuh 5!"

"Just hold up for a second. She thinks she's seen this before," she said thoughtfully. She lifted up the rim of her cap, and presented her empty hand to Kuki. "Numbuh 3, got any cotton swabs?"

"Sure do!" the girl chirped as she reached for her medical supplies. "Do you want a red one, a blue one, an orange one, a pink one, or a–"

Abby rolled her eyes as she took the orange swab, then promptly opened the Princess' mouth and swished it around inside. She brought the swab to eye-level, critically inspecting it. They were all waiting cautiously for her word when she made a murmur of confirmation. "Just as I thought. There's bits of ice cream shrapnel in her mouth. The Princess musta swallowed a whole heap of ice cream from the C.R.E.A.M.I.E."

"She _swallowed_ it?" Nigel gaped, horrified. "Ice cream in C.R.E.A.M.I.E. grenades are set at temperatures of negative bahmillion degrees!"

"Right. Numbuh 5 can't even eat ice cream dat cold without gettin' a nasty brain freeze. Which is exactly happened to Lil Miss Princess here." Abby carelessly flicked the cotton swab away before looking down at Yal'see with new understanding. "Yal'see's in a Brain Freeze Coma."

"Brain Freeze Coma?" Wally repeated. "What's that?"

"A brain freeze so bad, your whole head feels like it's in a cold snap. It's the worst kinda brain freeze out there. Numbuh 5 feels sorry for the poor thing."

Infinity seemed ruffled by all this new information. "So she has a brain freeze, that does not explain why she's not moving."

"Of course it does, fool. Her brain's frozen, and until it gets _un-_frozen, it ain't gonna be sending any commands to the rest of her body. She's, um, paralyzed from the brain down right now, if dat makes sense."

"Ah, I see," Infinity nodded. Then, in a split second, the diplomat held up Wally by the scruff of his coat; jerking him around like a madman. "LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE DONE!"

"HEY!" Most operatives would be intimidated by Infinity's high ranking status, and just let him have his way. Wally, of course, wasn't like most operatives. So, he had no problem punching Infinity in the face to force the boy to drop him. "Do that again, and the next one lays you out flat! Why is everyone blaming ME for this? It's not my fault!"

While Nigel and Kuki helped him to a standing position, Numbuh Infinity let out a spiteful hiss, "It needs to be someone's fault! Which one of you imbeciles threw the grenade?"

"Hey guys, everything cool back here?" Hoagie greeted as he unknowingly stepped into the hot spot, "They didn't follow us, so I put the computer on auto. Should be smooth cruising until we get to the checkpoint." Oblivious to all the glares being sent this way, the jovial pilot took a peek at the Princess and chuckled. "Hey, someone tell Yal'see if she keeps looking at us like that, her face is gonna get frozen that way," he laughed at his own little quip. That was the last straw on the camel's back, as Hoagie found himself getting a combo slap to the noggin by Abby and Numbuh 4-Below. "OW! Geez, tough crowd!"

"Numbuh 2," Nigel said with a monotonous drawl, and sector V knew that tone meant someone was about to _get it_. And no one ever wants to _get it_. Because when you _get it_, there's not much you could do about _it._ And _it_ was pretty bad. "Do you have the slightest notion as to what you have done?"

"Uh," Hoagie hesitated, "I'm guessing that saying, 'I've done nothing wrong what-so-ever, and I'm getting a medal' is being too optimistic?"

Abby held her thumb up, then blew out a low whistle as her thumb dropped towards the floor.

"Thought so."

"Allow me to enlighten you then. Thanks that _brilliant _maneuver of yours with that C.R.E.A.M.I.E. grenade, the Princess is now in a Brain Freeze Coma! Didn't anyone teach you to check your targets?"

"Well sorrrr-ry! Next time I see a buncha goons heading your way, I'll just point and hope for the best!"

"Hu-boon-do!" Numbuh 4-Below raged, Wally and Kuki tasked with holding her back. "Big stupid HU-BOON-DO!"

"Alright, _alright!_" Abby shouted, trying to reign everyone in. "Everybody just calm down. This ain't the time to act like it's the end of the world."

"As this mission's acting ambassador, I declare that it is the _perfect _time to act like it's the end of the world!" Infinity all but flipped out, not helping the tension at all. "It's all over! All our work in this region has been for nothing! Generations. It took us GENERATIONS to get a decent foothold in Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan's ice cream operations, and you idiots managed to send all that to heck in an Easter basket in _less than ten minutes_!"

"Ten minutes? We lasted a lot longer this time around," Hoagie proudly stated. Abby just let off an exasperated groan.

"I swear, I'm going to have you all decommissioned for this!"

"Lighten up, silly head!" Kuki tried to appease Numbuh Infinity, whom was in real danger of being the first kid to spontaneously combust. The girl made an effort of tidying his edged bow-tie and dusting off his fancy suit. "Look on the bright side, things could be a _loooot_ worse."

"They are!" he snapped, slapping her hands away. "In case it slipped your feeble little mind, this mission isn't over yet! We were to rescue Princess Yal'see and escort her back to the Tipuan summit where she was supposed to speak up and make sure her brother didn't break off our treaty!"

"Oh, I get it!" Wally spoke up. "If she's in a coma, then she can't speak at this summit thingy!"

"Wonderful observation, Numbuh 4. Do you want a gold star for figuring that one out?"

"There has to be a way to salvage this. We've come to far just to give up now!" Nigel fretted. His team was not going to be the cause of a failed treaty. Again. "It's just a brain freeze, right? Can't we warm her up or something?"

Abby shook her head. "She'll come out of it, but we got let it melt off naturally. Speeding up the process could be dangerous."

"Well that's great. Just great."

"Hu puna neki," Numbuh 4-Below began to spaz, pacing back and forth in front of the Princess' stiff body. "Alk no gan'po. _Noo_ gan'po…"

Wally took a step back from 4-Below, not wanting to risk getting slapped like Hoagie. "What's her problem?"

"I don't know, and I honestly don't care!" Infinity yelled. "'Let Sector V handle it', 'they're the most qualified', bah! I knew this was a mistake. If it had been up to me, I would have had another sector to substitute for you nimrods faster than you could say, 'Delightful Children From Down the Lane'."

Hoagie, who had opted to remain silent lest he get in more trouble, chose this moment to speak up when Infinity's words sparked a wild idea. "Substitute…substitute! Guys, I think I got it!"

Nigel pinched the bridge of his nose. "I think you've done enough, Numbuh 2."

"No, just hear me out, I think I know how we can make sure the Prince doesn't break off the treaty!" he hastily said. "What if we had the Princess show up, without her actually showing up?"

Wally blinked. "Okay, I know I'm not the only one who didn't get that."

"Ugh, don't you see? We just need to substitute the Princess!"

Kuki cutely tilted her head. "You mean like the substitute teacher with the glandular problem?"

"Yes! I mean, no. Well, kind of–no no, this is different," he tried to explain. "What I mean is, all we gotta do is dress somebody up to look exactly like the Princess, then we send the fake princess in to speak at the summit. They say a few words, shake some hands, then get out of there before anybody catches on."

"Dat has gotta be the most whacked out plan Numbuh 5 has heard in her life," Abby deadpanned, "and she listens to Numbuh 1 on a regular basis."

Normally, Nigel would have taken offense to that comment. But Hoagie's idea had sunk too deeply in his mind. "It _could_ work…"

"Case and point," Abby sighed. "Numbuh 1, you seriously can't believe we can pull that off!"

"Stranger things have happened," he tried to defend. "Look, I'm not too crazy about it either, but what choice do we have? I am not failing this mission when there's options available. Unless you have a better idea?"

"Say we did dress up somebody as the Princess; _how_ would they not botch it up? As soon as it gets to the talking part, we're doomed, 'cause none of us here even speak Ubekian."

Kuki suddenly jumped up, flinging her hand in the air for attention. "Oh! Oh oh oh! Numbuh Infinity could do it! He can tell scary ghost stories like everyone else here!"

Infinity was about to speak against it when Wally did it for him. "Are you stupid? That guy couldn't translate his way out of a paper bag."

The diplomat settled into a rigid glare as he got in Wally's personal space. "Are you implying I can't adequately negotiate between two foreign parties?" Infinity may have had his faults, but you never ever, ever, ever question his skills as a KND politician.

_Ever_.

Wally was not fazed, and held his ground. "No, I'm _im-ply-ing_ that ya can't speak a lick of Ubekian, and everything that's came outta yer mouth so far has made just about as much sense as guinea pigs doing the tango in a tub of gravy."

No one knew how long the staring contest went on between the two, the rest of children not daring to interrupt this ultimate test of wills. In the end, the victor would go undecided, for Wally and Infinity both withdrew at the same time. The blond Aussie huffed and leaned against the wall as the diplomat straightened out his suit.

"This folly of a plan will surely fail, but I will not stand by and let fragile peace slip through our fingers without acting," was Infinity calculated response. "Find a suitable replacement for Princess Yal'see, and I shall do all the talking."

"Now isn't that the sixty-four-dollar question," Nigel commented while stroking his chin. "Just _who _can we get to dress up as the Princess on such short notice?"

Abby, for one, couldn't believe how easily everyone seemed to be falling in step with this scheme. Like they really expected it to work with their track record. Ugh. Probably better to just blame it all on the cold and just go along with it. She took one look at the pale skinned child, and instantly marked herself off the list of candidates. "Numbuh 5 can't do it."

"Me! Me me me! I wanna dress up like a Princess!"

"Hey, maybe we should dress up Miss Slaps-a-lot over here. She's already Ubekian," Hoagie teased as he leaned away from Numbuh 4-Below, assuming she wouldn't hear him. But she did, and swiftly kicked him in the shin for his crude remark. "Lady, you need to learn to take a joke."

"Unless you people have hair dye randomly lying around somewhere, neither Numbuh 3 or 4-Below can fit the description," Infinity pointed out, "Yal'see is a blonde, as you can plainly see."

"Yeah, and a bit on the short side too," Abby added, now studying the girl with a keen eye, "Kinda, lanky lookin' when ya get a good look at her up close."

"And she's got this whole, 'tomboy' style goin' on," Hoagie imputed, framing his hands like he was some expert photographer, "Heck, loose the ponytail and trim up around the shoulders, and she'd pass for a boy."

"Hmm, so all we gotta do is find somebody with blonde hair, looks like a boy, and is short," Wally muttered thoughtfully, trying to sound smart by reiterating everything everyone had said so far. So caught up in his musings, he failed to see how the gang was staring at him. "Where the crud are we gonna find someone like that?"

Hoagie, Nigel, and Abby ignored whatever came out of Wally's mouth next. They were just too focused on his certain features. More specifically, his blond hair, boyish looks, and very short structure. Hoagie formed a wolfish grin as he turned to the others. "I can put a wig together…"

"Wig? Why are we gonna need a wig?" Wally asked. When he met their gazes, he was instantly put off by how everyone was just staring at him. "Why are you all staring at me? It's creepy!"

"It's…just like you said, Numbuh 4," Nigel coughed into his hand. The bald boy then slowly walked up to the Aussie, and put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "We need someone blonde, short, and eh, _boyish,_ if you catch my drift…"

Wally stared at Nigel's hand. Given how intently he was staring at it, you would think it became the most fascinating object in his little world. But that wasn't what was happening. No, you see, what was _really _going on was that the little hamster in Wally's mind had just woken up from its nap. The lazy fur ball stumbled up onto its cute pinwheel, and started a slow pace. The hamster began picking up speed, causing the wheel to spin faster, and faster, and faster…

And faster.

Hold on.

_Oh_.

Oh?

"OH!" Wally yelped, slapping Nigel away when it finally clicked. Wally took off for the back end of the RV, and held up a stray broom in defense; just daring anyone to try and get close. "No! No no no no no no _no NO!_ I am NOT–"

"Yay! Numbuh 4 gets to play Princess!" Kuki cheered. Okay, sure, she was a little jealous she wasn't the one who got to dress up, but that just meant she got to do something just as good. "I'll go get my Rainbow Monkey Travel Make-up Kit!"

"You all stay away from me!" He swung the broom once in a show of warning. "I know how to use this thing!"

"Hmm, Numbuh 5's not so sure, guys," Abby argued. "I mean, sure. The sport would make a _pretty_ princess," Chuckle. "but do we _really_ wanna have him representin' us?"

"We get ice cream _and_ cheesecake exports from here," Nigel crossed his arms, "You want to be the one to tell the Supreme Leader we screwed that up? Be my guest."

"Numbuh 5'll clean up Yal'see's fancy dress then."

Wally paled. "Y-you…you can't be serious! I ain't dressing up as some girl again!"

Infinity's raised brow was the only key sign of his surprise, "_Again_?"

"C'mon pal, take one for the team. It won't be so bad. You get to rub elbows with high society, have guys wait on you hand and foot, not to mention all those fancy finger hors d'oeuvres."

"If that's your thing, then why don't YOU do it!"

"You kidding? The dress isn't my style," Hoagie grinned, then clapped his hands together, "But on you, why it'll be _fabulous_! Ha ha ha ha!"

"Be reasonable, Numbuh 4," Nigel said sternly, "If we don't go through with this, we might as well kiss all that ice cream goodbye. Think of all the children who'll be forced to submit to Tasty Taste's trade laws!"

"I don't see you asking any of _them_ to dress up like a girly-girl!" Wally shot back. "Forget it, Numbuh 1. There ain't no way I'm doing it! Nope. Uh uh! No way, no how!"

* * *

"I _hate _you all. Hate hate hate," Wally growled, sounding quite akin to a skipping motor. The blond–or for the moment, _blonde_– was dragging his feet through the royal Tipuan estate courtyard. Adorned in Yal'see royal fair, thin fur garnishes along with the crystal tiara, and a ponytail wig slapped together with from the curls of a mop, the boy fit the role surprisingly well. At least until he opened his mouth, that is. "_All my hate_."

"Oh suck it up," Nigel grumbled. He was currently standing under Numbuh Infinity, with the latter boy hitching a ride on the former's shoulders. The two boys wore a long, adult sized robe belonging to one of Ubekian officials; hiding Nigel from view while Infinity blew bows and waves from up top. "All you have to do is smile and look pretty."

"I am neva going to smile again after this," Wally grumbled, "And being pretty's for sissies!"

"I must say, these Ubekians have an exquisite fashion sense," Infinity awed at the fabric he wore, digging the design and texture. "How on Earth did you guys manage to get your hands on this?"

Nigel smiled proudly, though it was hard to see from behind the robe, "My team has their methods."

Outside the estate grounds, Abby and Kuki had their hands full stuffing the body of an unconscious, half-naked Ubekian official in the trunk of the RV.

"How do I get myself into these things?" Wally moaned. Scratch what he said before, _now _this mission officially blew chunks. It blew all kinds of nasty, stupid, cruddy chunks of crud. "Just peachy. How long do I have to look like this?"

"Just until Yal'see's alliance with the Kids Next Door is secured," Nigel explained while treading along carefully as they journeyed up a flight of icy stairs, "If Numbuh Infinity is right–"

"Which I most certainly am."

"–then they'll start the meeting by asking you a few questions. With Numbuh Infinity's help–"

"Which you most certainly need."

"–you'll answer them correctly, then they'll dismiss us so they can get the real 'adult' business." Those last few words were tapered with a certain amount of distaste. "Then we get out of there, and hope the Princess isn't too…annoyed with us once the Brain Freeze Coma wears off."

"Because I'm sure that happens to her quite often," Infinity snipped sarcastically. "Keep it down you two, we're approaching the entrance."

The disguised operatives came to the top of the stair way, the nippy winds being blocked out by the longhouse before them. Once Infinity and Nigel were sure their robe was in order and Wally was presentable–as presentable as Wally could get, anyway– they marched down the walkway, coming up on two iron clad guards standing vigilantly by the door.

"Muli," one spoke, lowering his weapon, "Cal'ho johl?"

For some reason or another, Infinity blanked. "Uh…"

"What are you waiting for?" Nigel hissed, "Say something!"

"Copul tor?" the guard's deposition wasn't getting any better, and they were a second away from kicking the idiot out. But that was before they finally saw the small 'girl' at the official's side. "Y-Yal'see!" They suddenly became all smiles and cupcakes, and opened the doorway while going into an exaggerated bow.

Wally rolled his eyes as he stomped in, Nigel and Infinity following in behind him. Once they were inside the warmth of the lavish longhouse, the blonde rose his head to fuss. "What was all that about back there? Ya clam up or something?"

"A very good question," Nigel agreed, poking his head out, "This isn't the time for your nerve to fail you, Numbuh Infinity. If they hadn't fell for Numbuh 4's disguise, they would have thrown us to the wolves! Or whatever wildlife they have up here."

"I…I'm not sure," Infinity stuttered. He didn't know how to explain it, but those guards back there…for moment, he could've sworn whatever they said was complete gibberish. He didn't understand a word of it. But he kept that information to himself, he didn't need to give these two any more reason to undermine his authority. "I-I'm just feeling a bit overwhelmed. It shall not happen a second time."

"Let's hope so." Nigel withdrew back into the robe, and continued down the hall towards the main court.

At the same moment, further down the hall and inside the room the boys were trying to enter, First-Born Prince Yul'sha Tipuan sat diligently as the elders went on about their political business. The teenager took a sip of tea one of the servants presented him, and smirked into his drink when he noted the distress in the old geezers' voices. No doubt wondering where his sister, Yal'see, could be during this crucial meeting.

Things were going along quite swimmingly, if he allowed himself to gloat. All his family's elders, advisers, and allies were attending this meeting along with the dozens of other guests and businessmen seated around him. With his sister located at the base of the Numa Mountain, far from this meeting, endless debate was sparking up in attempts to stall. But they would never find her in time, he made sure of that.

A smug look overcame his features, though it went unnoticed by everyone. Yes, Yal'see was far away, safely tucked away from all this, and without her here, they would be forced to adjourn this foolish nonsense. Of course, he had the next summit to worry about, but he had thought ahead, and procured several other installments around the country to hide his sister. He would keep hiding her until the elders dropped this idea entirely.

Oh yes, nothing was going to ruin his brilliant plan. Nothing at all.

"Left, go left. No, your _other _left!"

What was that?

"My left is your left! There is no '_other_' left, idiot! Do you mean right?"

"No, I mean–Gaah! Your inane sense of direction is going to blow our cover!"

"MY sense of direction? I'm not the one who doesn't know the difference between his–OW! You kicked me in the neck!"

"Can I take off this dress now?"

"_NO!_"

Prince Yul'sha, along with the rest of the court, had dropped everything as the commotion from the hall drew closer and closer. Suddenly, the door to the room flew upon, and an awkward looking Ubekian official came barging in, sending death glares to his mid-sections for some odd reason. The men of the room looked on wary, not recognizing this man, while the woman looked on with contempt, dying to know his beauty secrets. His face. Why, he didn't look a day over eleven!

"Stop stop stop!" Infinity kicked Nigel again to get him to comply. The Brit had restrain himself from throwing the boy halfway across the room. After the hazardous task of regaining his balance, Numbuh Infinity became acutely aware of the fact that he had the entire room's attention. "Uh," at a loss for words, he did the next best thing and pulled Wally out from behind him. "Yal'see!"

The effect was instant. The entire room lit up like a Christmas tree, as if their savor had been returned to them. The boys were slightly put off by how happy they all seemed, to say the least.

Not everyone was dancing with glee, however. Prince Yul'sha's face filled with immense dread at the sight of the "Princess". They had found Yal'see, and brought her back here? Who? How? Why? Not thinking, the Prince leapt from his seat like it was on fire, running towards what he believed was his sister and the official escorting her.

Wally grumbled at how the whole place was celebrating his arrival. What a load of losers. He then saw the Prince headed their way, and became even more upset. Because of his stupid disguise, he couldn't even give the lousy teenager a knuckle sandwich! "Incoming."

"Yal'see na'gik? No suni! Neiw gon'kon ori!" the Prince flipped out, coming up and shaking Infinity by the shoulders. Before he could say another word, he hunched over in pain as something hit his leg. He snapped down, thinking the official had kicked him, but he stumbled back in shock when he saw a outstretched arm instead. "Tu _ful_?"

"You're too late to stop us now, Yul'sha." Nigel's face peaked out from the robes to give the flabbergasted prince a smoldering glare. "Your clever little ruse is over. Your plot to keep the Princess away from the summit was impressive, but the Kids Next Door are always one step ahead of you."

Yul'sha blinked as he registered the foreign boy's words. Infinity was about to call for someone to haul the Prince away when he shocked all three of them by uttering, "Kids Next Door? What are you idiots doing here? You'll ruin everything!"

"Wait," Wally gasped, "you speak English?"

"What the?" Yul'sha balked. "You…you're not…what is going on here!"

"I'll tell you what's going on," Infinity answered in a hushed tone, "Your efforts to break Princess Yal'see's alliance and force KND forces out of the area is over. As long as we are young and able, we will never allow your adult masters from the Tasty Taste corporation to have influence here."

"Tasty Taste influence? What are you–"

"Yul'sha," came a raspy voice from across the room. One of the family heads stood up, and waved the boy off. "Ho'pal no-semi. Tal guk."

"Uh, dove nol krosis fo'poa!" the Prince quickly recovered as he turned to face the speaking adult. "Yal'see no hu'malorna. NO hu–"

"Ne'k!" the adult interrupted. He brushed his hand to the side, signaling for the boy to leave. "Gur mek'a."

The Prince fumed as guards came up to his sides. One put their hand on his shoulder, but he threw it off, storming out the room. The guards shared a shrug, then proceeded to escort the royal son out of the meeting, leaving the three children confused.

Wally blinked as they closed the doors. "What just happened?"

"It seems there was some argument," Infinity assumed. "At least that's one less thing to worry about."

"Yal'see ta'me!" They were brought back to the reality of the situation when the adult at the hand of the table greeted them with open arms. "So'poa nul kana! Qulu omi di'vinn?"

"Alright Infinity," Nigel lowered his voice to a whisper, "Translate for Numbuh 4."

"Uh, yes…" he said hesitantly. "He asks if you…um, if you would to…uh, oh no."

"What's wrong?"

"Er, y-you have to understand," Infinity slowly started, now realizing why he didn't understand the royal guards outside and what the problem was. "I've only ever translated for the Ubekian Kids Next Door sector, and they speak a more, rough country variant of the language. These adults here…I-I'm not _entirely _familiar with their regional dialect…"

Close to snapping, Wally jumped up and pulled Infinity down to face level. "You mean to tell me after forcing me to dress like a stupid princess, you have _no_ idea what they're saying?"

"No! I-I…no! I can do this, I can!" Infinity tried to persuade, "It's just the same language, different dialect. Give me a moment, and I can do a rough translation, I promise?"

"Yal'see?" the adult repeated, a tad more suspicious what with the odd display before them all, "Qulu omi di'vinn?"

"Um, okay. I recognize the word 'council' in there. Um, something about being presented…" Infinity racked his brain, "I think I got it, tell him, yes. Uk."

Wally sighed, then out a feminine sounding, "Uk."

"Ah," the man seemed pleased. "Iu'pon yula omi no Yul'sha's kar'naak?"

"Something about the Prince's opinion on…something?"

Nigel groaned. "They're probably asking do you agree with Yul'sha's opinion on the alliance. Tell them no!"

"Uh, how do I say that?"

"Nid," Infinity supplied.

"Nid!" Wally parroted. He then became confused at how most of the council responded to his answer. "They seem a little _too _happy about that."

"I agree," Nigel said, peaking out a slit in the robe. "Something seems…off."

"Tois maka!" the adult laughed. He then clapped his hand, and from the far corner of the room, a previously unimportant party stepped up to take stage in front of the council. The boys then saw another child. A boy in similar royal garbs, disgustingly picking his nose with no shame. They flinched at the scene, but the adult elder only patted the young one comfortingly. "Oumi ya'la yupio hu'malorna?"

"Who the heck is that dork?"

"Proposal?" Infinity muttered, only succeeding in confusing himself, "What proposal? Do they mean the alliance?"

"Infinity, what is going on?" Nigel demanded.

"Uh, just say yes, Numbuh 4."

"Fine," Wally scoffed. He really didn't care what these old farts were talking about, the quicker he got out of this dress, the faster he could start working on forgetting this horrible mission. "Uk."

"UK!" the man cheered. "Yal'see uk-uki! Noma kel'ak anorns, hu'malorna, aki'nin!"

"Now what did he say?"

"I don't understand. He called an end to the meeting, but just started something else. Something to do about 'hu'malorna'. I don't know what that word means, but have a feeling it's rather important."

"A-Ah!" Numbuh 1 and Infinity jumped when they heard Wally yelped. They turned just in time for Infinity to see the boy being carted away by a group of giggling maids. "Guys! HELP!"

"Was that Numbuh 4?" Nigel asked, "I can't see a thing, what's going on?"

"They're taking him somewhere."

"Where?"

"I don't know, we need to follow them. Quick, go left," Infinity paused, and looked down dryly towards Nigel. "And I actually mean _left_ this time."

* * *

He should probably be feeling guilty about what he just did. He really should be, but he just wasn't. Yes, it wasn't fair to just start yelling at them like that, they were only doing their jobs. But that gave them no right put their girly mitts all over him. Personal space much?

Poor Wally was in a predicament. A rather annoying predicament. Even labeling it 'annoying' was a courtesy at this point. He just couldn't believe how lame this day was getting. At first he was hyped, because it was a rescue mission. Finally some action! But then he found out he was rescuing a princess. Okay, kind of stupid, but he would deal.

Then he somehow ended up dressing as said princess…

He _wasn't_ happy with that decision, just to make himself clear.

Now, after some ridiculous meeting he didn't understand a lick of, here he was: cooped up in some plushy room with violet wall textures, a soft rug shaped like a puppy dog face staring up at him from the floor, and a way-too-stuffed up bed with fancy pillows and 'cute' dollies. He supposed he was in the princess' room, and to be honest? He wasn't a fan. After witnessing her decoration sense, he didn't feel all that sorry for her getting frozen.

Alright, that line of thinking was a little mean, but can you blame him? He didn't know what exactly to think at the moment. But two things he did know, were that the first chance he got, he was going to tear the stupid dress he was forced to wear to itty bitty little shreds.

And he was going to beat the pure living snot out of Numbuh Infinity the next time he saw him.

"You are the worst lower half I've ever seen, honestly! Go _right_!"

"I AM going–ooooh no, I'm not going down that road again."

Wally watched as the door to his room began to open. He half expected those lousy maids to come in again, but he was somewhat relieved when Numbuh Infinity and Nigel entered instead. The diplomat hopped down onto the floor as Nigel threw the robe off his body. The bald boy was all to happy not having to carry around Infinity anymore. His shoulders couldn't take it.

The blond's expression brightened at the sight of his comrades, even more so when his eyes landed on Infinity. "Numbuh Infinity!" Wally cheered, hopping off the bed to greet the boy personally.

The kid himself was slightly put off by Wally's odd smile as he headed straight for him. "Er, hello, Numbuh 4?" Wally stopped in front of him, a bit closer to his face than he would have liked. Before he could voice his discomfort, however, the boy suddenly raised a fist, and cocked it back.

Nigel was in the middle of relaxing his shoulder muscles when he noticed Infinity flying right by him and slamming into the wall. The bald boy looked from the crumpled mass of diplomat to the smirking blond princess with a disapproving gaze. "Numbuh 4! That was wrong!"

"But it felt so _right_," Wally deviously chuckled as he dusted off his knuckles. As he caught Numbuh Infinity slowly getting to his feet, he snorted. "That'll learn ya!"

Numbuh Infinity normally took the moral high ground in most situations, but that didn't mean he was above going for the low blow. "It's fitting you're dressed like a princess since you obviously hit like one."

Wally's eyes widened before narrowing into silts. "I'M ONLY DRESSED LIKE THIS BECAUSE OF _YOUR _STUPID PLAN!"

"It's not _my _stupid plan, I only play a stupid part in it."

"I DON'T CARE! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO GOT ME INTO THIS MESS!"

"He has a point, Numbuh Infinity," Nigel spoke up. But while he agreed with Wally, that didn't mean he would let the boy loose to inflict bodily harm on Infinity. "Something obviously got lost in translation back there. What happened? What did you make Numbuh 4 agree to?"

"Why don't you tell me, and we'll all know," Infinity grumbled as he straightened out his robes. Just because they weren't his clothes didn't mean they should be so mistreated. "I'm not above admitting I've made a mistake, it's just it doesn't happen that often."

Wally growled, "This whole mission would beg ta differ."

"I _thought _we were affirming Yal'see's stance on her treaty with the Kids Next Door, but that's not the case. They shouldn't have brought you back to her quarters and they certainly shouldn't be preparing for some grand event out there."

"He's right," Nigel nodded. "On the way here, we noticed everyone was getting ready for something. What just don't know what."

Wally childishly stomp at the ground. "Doesn't anyone know what the heck is going on?"

"You fools!" came the voice of the room's unexpected guest. The boys were startled when the door was kicked open and First-Born Prince Yul'sha himself came barging in. The teenager appeared as if he would bring down an unspeakable wrath down on the three unsuspecting operatives. "You've ruined everything! Do you have any idea what you've just done?"

"I've just about had it with this entire country!" Nigel roared, pulling out a weapon from who-knows-where. "You better give us some answers, _teenager_. What have you done?"

"Me? I've tried to stop this all from happening!" Yul'sha proclaimed.

Nigel grinned. "Ah ha! So you admit you've been trying to get the adults to abandon Yal'see's treaty!"

The prince seemed ready to blow a fuse. "THIS MEETING HAS NOTHING TO DO ABOUT MY SISTER'S TREATY!"

The three blinked, Nigel lowering his weapon a bit. "What?"

"This meeting was about my sister's arranged marriage, which you children just agreed to go along with!"

"…What?"

"Exactly," another voice spoke from the door. The children and the prince all turned to see a platoon of elite ice cream men blocking the door. At the head of the squad was none other than Mr. Boss, looking all too pleased with himself as he dipped the ash of his cigar into the floor. "And it wouldn't have been possible without the Kids Next Door. Thanks for the help, suckers."

"Mr. Boss?" Infinity spluttered. He took a step back behind Nigel and Wally, whom were switching aim from all the new targets in the room and preparing for a fight, respectively. "What are YOU doing here?"

"I'm here for the wedding," the adult grinned, taunting waving an expensive looking envelope in the air. "What's the matter? You brats didn't get an invitation?"

B-But there shouldn't even BE a wedding!" Nigel cried in protest. The poor sector leader was in shambles trying to piece it all together. "What's happening!"

"Why don't you let prince-y over here get ya up to speed," Mr. Boss grumbled as he motioned towards Yul'sha. "Running his mouth is about the only thing the punk's good for."

Yul'sha sneered at the businessman as he gave the explanation everyone wanted to hear. "This Tasty Taste dog managed to pervert our scared traditions and fashion together a farce wedding between my sister and Second-Born Son Gur-tin of the Kola'ta family."

Nigel was having a difficult time following. "Wait, who are the Kola'ta family?"

Infinity interrupted to answer. "The Kola'ta are a rival family to the Tipuans. They used to run a sizable ice cream trading business that was only outshone by the Tipuans themselves."

Yul'sha nodded. "But that was before my family was able to buy out their business and absorbed the remains of their shattered ice cream empire into our own."

"Only thing is, the Kola'tas hold a grudge," Mr. Boss said as he used one of Yal'see's dolls to extinguish his cigar. "Unfortunate for you, but very profitable for me."

"Wait, you're allied with the Kola'tas?"

"Who says you brats get the monopoly on ice cream treaties?" the adult frowned. "But yeah, we cut a deal with them after that Yal'see brat screwed up Tasty Taste relations with the Tipuans. When we came to do business with them, the spoiled brat hired us a bad translator, and because of him, we ended up insulting their family name and got kicked out of the compound! Do you have any idea how frustrating it is to have all your hard worked botched because of some hack job of a translator?"

Nigel and Wally sent Numbuh Infinity dry glares, but said nothing out loud.

"We couldn't get near the Tipuans after that, but then the Kola'tas approached us with a deal. Working with them, we've managed to broker something of a 'peace' between families. Heh heh."

"The final nail my family's coffin was this wedding," Yul'sha finished for the man. "To ensure future peace with the Kola'tas, Yal'see is to be wed with the heir of the Kola'ta legacy, with Tasty Taste representatives paying for the event and acting as mediators."

Nigel shook his head. "I still don't understand. Why is Mr. Boss pushing for this wedding? Why all the secrecy?"

"Don't you get it, Numbuh 1?" Infinity growled, disgusted as he figured out the adult's angle. "Once Yal'see is married off, she'll have no more sway within the Tipuan family. Without her to speak for us, they'll cut off support for her treaty with the KND."

Yul'sha scoffed. "Even if they continue to support it, the treaty will not matter. Due to a heavily obscured fine print within the marriage contract I discovered, the Kola'ta family will assume control of all my family's ice cream operations once Yal'see is married!"

"Nosy little punk, aren't ya," Mr. Boss grumbled. "But yeah, he's got it figured out. Which is why he's been a pain in my side ever since! He's done everything to make sure this deal doesn't fall through!"

Nigel turned his gaze to the prince. "Why not just tell your family about the contract?"

Yul'sha lowered his head, looking a tad ashamed. "I have…done things my family doesn't condone. Combined with no evidence, it is my 'distrustful' word against Tasty Taste's sliver tongues. With that in mind, I became desperate to save my family's name and my sister."

Something clicked within Infinity's mind, causing him to pinch the bridge of his nose. "It all makes sense now. The prince was working to make sure this sham of a treaty failed by keeping Yal'see safe and hidden away…and then we found her and delivered her right into their hands."

Mr. Boss slowly clapped. "Bravo!"

"That can't be right!" Nigel argued. "My sources claimed otherwise! How could we have been fed false information?"

Mr. Boss smirked as he stepped aside to reveal his accomplice. "Kids Next Door, meet your 'sources'."

Out from behind Mr. Boss came a grizzly of a man. Literally. The bulking figure marched up wearing a white lab coat with the sleeves torn asunder. Two fur-coated arms stretched out from the torn sleeves coming into a set of paws and claws replacing what should have been human hands. His scalp was barren apart from two crisp strands of auburn hair poking out, and a skinny beard of matching color sticking out from his chin.

Nigel blinked as he recognized the man, and then planted his face in his palm as he groaned. "Oh, not you…"

"That's right! It is I, Professor Triple Extra Large!" the madman crackled as he waved his mutated arms in the air triumphantly. He then pointed an extended claw in the kids' direction, grinning a broken smile. "And it was also me, using the amazing scientific powers of photo-shop and this thing called the 'internet', who fed you false data and information regrading the situation!" He then flashed an excited smile. "I also opened a Google Plus account."

Mr. Boss rolled his eyes at the scientist's antics. "Yeah, wasn't my idea to hire the loony, but he's had past experience feeding you idiots false information. So with his help, we were able to trick you brats into 'rescuing' the princess and bring her straight to us."

Infinity gave Nigel a shrewd look. "Excellent work there, Numbuh 1."

"How was I…I thought that…" Nigel fumbled, utterly shamed that he had been duped by the Professor. Again. "B-But why would you even be helping them at all, Professor? You're not even a part of Tasty Taste!"

"Of course I'm not!" the Professor seemed appalled by the implication. "Haven't you been listening? Their business strategies are downright desperate and evil! I just agreed to do this because once they gain control of the Tipuan trading empire, they'll send me all the ice cream resources I need to create the world's most perfect snow cone! Ah ha ha ha ha!"

"So…you would never normally work with them?"

"Nope!" the Professor nodded proudly. "No matter what they offered me!"

"But you ARE working for them…because they offered you resources!"

"Hey…_shut up_."

"'Sides," Mr. Boss intervened, "he's got a license to marry people here in this country, so he's the acting High Priest to serve as a neutral party in this wedding."

Wally rose a brow at that little fact. "Why the crud do you have a Ubekian marriage license?"

"For science."

"Wait a minute," Mr. Boss' eyes widened the moment he heard Wally speak. He looked over towards the boy, only now just realizing he wasn't who he originally thought he was. "That's not the princess!"

"Er, t-that's right! WE fooled YOU! Ha ha!" Nigel laughed, pulling Wally's makeshift wig off. "This is really Numbuh 4! The real princess is somewhere safe and sound."

The Professor was confused. "Why is he dressed up like the princess?"

Wally slumped, being subjected to complete and utter humiliation right in front of their sworn enemies. "Because my life sucks."

"Either way," Nigel drew attention back to himself, "WE win!"

"No, we don't," Infinity groaned, garnering a puzzled gaze from Nigel. "Once the officials find out one of our operatives impersonated Princess Yal'see, the Tipuans will be insulted and the treaty will be off for sure." The boy sighed, wondering how he managed to be in the center of the second worst political scandal in KND History. "That's not even considering what would happen if they found out Yal'see is in a Brain Freeze Coma."

Yul'sha, who had been plotting how to break out of the room until now, did a double take. "My sister is in a _what _now?"

"Uh, boss?" one of the more curious Ice Cream Men spoke up. "Does that mean the wedding is off?"

"Do I pay you to ask questions?" Mr. Boss snapped, causing the guard to calm up. The agitated adult scratched at his chin. He needed to marry off this Yal'see brat, but now thanks to Sector V, she still was out of his reach. Nearly close to having a conniption at the thought of failure, he turned to the Professor for answers. "Well? How the heck do we salvage this?"

"Sir, I am a mad scientist, not a politician," the Professor huffed. "I'm only here to marry off people and get my resources."

"Resources you won't get if this wedding is canceled!"

"Oh, a conundrum then." The Professor's eyes crossed as he hunkered down, thinking of a way to salvage the operation. Suddenly, it hit him as he snapped his claws. "No one outside of this room is aware that the boy isn't Yal'see, so as long as he continues the charade, I can marry them…even though I'd be in extreme violation of the oath I took when I got my license."

Nigel frowned as he and Infinity stepped in front of Wally. "And if he doesn't go along with your sick plan?"

The Professor shrugged. "Then he faces capital punishment for impersonating a royal Ubekian figure."

"And what's the capital punishment?"

"Summary execution by firing squad."

Mr. Boss smirked. "Looks like you're gonna take your little cross-dressing act out there or get turned into Swiss cheese there, bucko."

"Now wait just a minute," Infinity interrupted. "This is bound to fail either way! He can't possibly keep pretending forever. They'll find out eventually!"

"Once the wedding is over and the contract is signed, it won't matter," the adult chortled. "If it's one thing I love more than kicking you brats to the curve, it's exploiting a loophole."

"Forget it!" Wally shouted. "I'd rather go ahead and get shot now than go out there and get MARRIED!"

"Yeah, I get that feeling," Mr. Boss solemnly nodded before glaring. "But you don't have a choice!"

"Oh yeah? Well then–"

"Numbuh 4…"

Wally froze at Nigel's tone of voice. The blond then looked disbelievingly back to his sector leader. There was no way he wanted him to… "Numbuh 1…y-you can't be serious!"

"Just…" Nigel hesitantly began. He rose his hands as the guards surrounded him and Infinity, and sent Wally the most apologetic look he could muster. "Just play along for now, for your own sake. We'll…we'll think of _something_."

"Go do your thinking outside, time is money," Mr. Boss snapped. He faced he guards and proceeded to give out tasks. "Throw the two brats outside the compound and make sure they stay out. The rest of you lock the prince punk up in his room and make sure he doesn't get out until the ceremony is over."

Yul'sha struggled as the guards dragged him, Nigel, and Infinity out of the room. "You can't do this!"

"Of course I can, I got diplomatic immunity," Mr. Boss crackled as the riff-raff were tossed back. He looked back to Wally, who looked angered yet resigned, then faced the Professor and harshly spat, "You make sure that brat is ready to go when the wedding starts, and make sure no officials find out we're duping them. That clear?"

The Professor crossed his furry arms. "You know, if I wasn't under your employ, I'd point out how underhanded your plan is. That, and ask for a sample of your DNA."

"Geez, now you sound like my wife," Mr. Boss grumbled as he left the room. Now alone with the boy, the Professor turned to Wally with a giddy expression. He then rushed towards the princess's wardrobe and began fiddling through every article of clothing Yal'see owned.

"Oh, don't worry, I'm sure everything will work out! Well, for us anyway, but I'll give you free snow cones for life as thanks for your forced service!"

"Wow," Wally droned as he laid back on the bed, contemplating just jumping out the window and hightailing it. "That's super."

"Why thank you!" the Professor gushed as he held up a few wedding gowns. "Now, are you a summer, or a winter?"

* * *

**Three parter it is.**

**Or maybe more. I'm stuffing more silliness in than I originally had planned.  
**

**_Does his business while he can~_  
**


	3. Chapter 3

_**This Calls For "Diplomacy"**_

* * *

"Hmm, those jalapeno pepper thermals are keeping the engine from freezing over. I owe Numbuh 89.94 five bucks," Hoagie muttered to himself as he kept himself occupied with the RV's heat emissions. After being partially responsible for the mess they were in now, he opted to make himself useful the best way he knew how: insure the getaway vehicle was in top condition. He would normally point out how there was no way he would end up sending anyone into a coma from the driver's seat, but the chubby child wisely kept his mouth on that end. It wasn't like he needed to jinx the mission anymore.

As his thoughts drifted towards the current situation, the pilot swerved his seat so he faced the back of the RV. Peaking his head around the corner, his eyes darted around until they landed on Kuki. "Hey Numbuh 3, how's the princess holding up?"

"Ugh, she's doing _fine_."

Hoagie was taken back by the usually chipper girl's clipped tone. "Then what's wrong?"

"She's cheating, that's what's wrong!" Kuki huffed from Yal'see's bedside. The dark haired girl had sat by the comatose princess to monitor her condition. However, Kuki had somehow managed to slip an entire hand of cards into Yal'see's frozen fingers while she held her own hand close to her chest. Kuki glanced down to her cards once again, then growled as she tossed one of them into the steadily growing pile of cards at Yal'see's waist. "No fair! No one's ever beaten me at Go Fish!"

Hoagie looked amused as he stood from his seat. "Um, I was kinda talking about her _condition_, Numbuh 3. What are you doing anyway?"

"Oh, her condition's stable. I think she should be up in about an hour. But that's a looong time to wait, and I thought she would get bored! So, we're playing Go Fish to pass the time," Kuki smiled as she revealed her charming little idea. But that smile was replaced with a frown as she eyed the pile of cards Yal'see had managed to haggle off of her. "But it's, like, impossible to beat her! She has a really good poker face…"

"Uh, yeah. Well, good luck with that," Hoagie said awkwardly. Silence settled in, and between the comatose body and Kuki playing cards with aforementioned comatose body, he decided it was time for a changed in scenery. Things were getting a little too creepy for his tastes. "I'm gonna go check on Numbuh 5 and 4-Below and see if the others have gotten back yet."

"Okie-Dokie! Now, Princess, do you have any threes?" Kuki inquired after waving off Hoagie. The cute girl smirked, gripping her cards closer to her chest. She had the royal child this time, she was sure of it!

However, she was only met with silence. Frowning, Kuki made a noise of frustration as she chucked a card into the pile. "Man, you are _good_."

A cold blast of chilly air greeted Hoagie as he stepped out from the warmth of the RV. It was just another reminder they were far away from the comforting branches of their cosy suburban treehouse. This would be the last time he jumped on an opportunity to escape boredom without researching the weather.

As he zipped his coat up a bit tighter, he looked out to see Abby and Numbuh 4-Below situated behind a rather tall mound of snow. He looked on a bit further to see the glorious Tipaun estate in the distance, the compound looking as imposing and expensive as it did when they first arrived. Shaking off the thought, he walked towards the girls.

"What's up, guys?" Hoagie greeted as he neared the two. Never being able to resist a comedic opportunity, he stifled a chuckle as he said, "Just _chilling_?" He laughed at his little pun, but was then caught off guard as a snowball collided with his face. "Hey!"

Abby simply pointed towards 4-Below, who looked all too satisfied as she hunkered back down to look through her binoculars.

Hoagie eyed the foreign operative before grumbling, "So besides all the wintery fun you gals must be having, seen anything interesting going on in the compound?"

"Numbuh 4-Below hasn't seen anything," Abby answered. "Numbuh 5 hasn't got any updates from Numbuh 1 either."

"Well, he did say to maintain radio silence just in case."

"Yeah. How's the Princess?"

"She's fine. Numbuh 3's playing Go Fish with her."

Abby blinked. "She's up already?"

"Nah, not yet," Hoagie replied in negative.

"Then how-never mind," Abby sighed as she dropped the subject. Best she didn't know what Kuki was up to this time.

Hoagie noticed Abby's frigid state, and he highly doubted Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan's climate was at fault. "What's eatin' ya?"

"Something just don't feel right, Numbuh 1 and Numbuh 4 shoulda been back by now," Abby replied, taking another cautious glance towards the compound. "This mission is just about to get a whole lot more crazier. Count on it."

"C'mon, don't be like that," Hoagie tried to reassure her. After a few moments of awkward silence, his expression become worrisome. "Seriously, _don't be like that_. One more screw-up on this mission, and Numbuh 86 is gonna have a field day roundin' us up for decommissioning."

"Why so worried, Numbuh 2? You've only just put Honorable Princess Yal'see into a Brain Freeze Coma," was the sarcastic reply. The only thing that caught Hoagie off guard was the fact the response came from Numbuh 4-Below. "I can't imagine why Numbuh 86 would decommission you for something like _that_."

Hoagie's jaw might as well have dropped to the ground right then and there. Numbuh 4-Below just spoke to him. _In perfect English_. He slowly looked towards Abby, becoming even more confused when his friend just began laughing up a storm. "B-But…you mean she can speak–"

"English? Of course I can," Numbuh 4-Below sighed. Did he have to talk about her like she was not even five inches away from him? "I'd be a very inefficient second-in-command if I could not properly communicate with the other sectors of the world."

The poor boy didn't know exactly what to feel about that revelation. He snapped his gaze to Abby, who was working to contain her bouts of giggles. "And you knew?"

"She came clean with Numbuh 5 after Numbuh 1 and the others went in the compound," Abby chuckled into her hand.

Hoagie still didn't understand what in the world was so funny. "But I don't get it…if you can speak fluent English, then why did we need to bring Infinity? The only reason he's here is to translate!"

At that, Numbuh 4-Below smirked. "Because _he_ doesn't know we can speak English."

Hoagie tapped his chin in thought, beginning to get a good idea of what she meant. "So, all those times we thought he _mistranslated_…" he trailed off, fighting the rising grin he felt coming on. "You sly dogs."

"He's such an arrogant know-it-all," 4-Below giggled. "It's so worth it to see him get so flustered and caught off-guard. Why, we once got him to call the Supreme Leader a chubby blonde ditzy-doo."

"A ditzy-doo? Oh man, that's–wait a minute," Hoagie paused, his eyes narrowing in suspicion. "So if you've been able to speak and understand English this entire time…why did you slap me all those times?"

Numbuh 4-Below's expresssion became dry as she blankly stared at the boy. Just when she was about to enlighten him, two echoing screams in the background became more and more potent as they got closer. All three children looked up to see two flailing bodies crashing down towards them. They all jumped out of the way, watching in stunned silence as Nigel and Numbuh Infinity pile-dived into the snowy mound.

"Well, dat ain't a good sign," Abby grimaced as she watched to two boys struggle around in the snow. Shaking her head, she and Hoagie moved to assist their fallen leader pick himself up.

"What's with all the hubbub out here?" Kuki pried as her head poked out of the RV. Upon seeing Abby and Hoagie pulling Nigel out from the snow, her face brightened as she skipped over to her friends. "Oh, you're back! Did you guys have fun in there?"

Nigel coughed up a chunk of snow and shivered as he got his bearings. "Fun–HACK–is not the word I would've used to describe it."

Kuki blinked, looking around for a certain someone. "Where's Numbuh 4?"

"Yeah, boss. Where is the sport anyway?"

Nigel looked ashamed as he held his head low. "Things…didn't go as planned."

"Mmmph!" came the muffled reply of Infinity, still buried in the snow. Being the closest to him, Numbuh 4-Below grabbed one of his ankles, and jerked the boy up by his leg. Infinity felt a slight sense of vertigo as he was abruptly righted, but that did nothing to soften the hard expression painted over his features. "Biggest understatement of the century. Wait, no; biggest understatement _of all time_!"

"Mind telling us what happened?" Hoagie stepped in, not liking how the mood in the air seemed to get colder than the weather itself. "Why were you guys thrown out of the estate, and why isn't Numbuh 4 with you? What's going on?"

"Your teammate is getting married," Infinity bluntly said, "_that's_ what is going on."

"…Sorry, the weather must be gettin' to Numbuh 5," Abby slowly said. "Did you just say Numbuh 4–_our _Numbuh 4–is getting _married_?"

Infinity tossed Nigel an expectant look, and the bald boy sighed as his hands fiddled together. "It was all a ruse. This mission, our intell, all of it was a lie. Prince Yul'sha wasn't kidnapping his sister, he was protecting her from an arranged marriage."

"Um, mind filling us in 'bout the parts we weren't there for? Which is to say, _all of it_?"

"Mr. Boss is secretly working with a rival family to seize control of the Tipaun ice cream trading empire. Yal'see was to be wed to the heir of Kola'ta family as part of an arranged marriage to make peace between the families. But it's all a trick. Once the marriage contracts have been signed, the Kola'tas will seize control right from under the Tipaun's noses."

"Prince Yul'sha was aware of this, and sent his sister away for her own safety," Infinity butted in, glaring in Nigel's general direction. "But since a certain bald sector leader–I'm not saying any names, mind you–allowed himself to be fed false information, we ended up undoing all that and delivering Yal'see right into Mr. Boss' hands!"

Hoagie snapped his fingers. "That's why she went bonkers during the escape; she thought _we_ were working for Mr. Boss! Man, talk about your situational irony."

"But Yal'see's here!" Kuki quickly pointed out. "She can't be married while she's with us right? _Right_?"

"No need to worry, Numbuh 4's doing a fine job of filling in for her," Infinity grumbled to himself.

Nigel hesitantly explained, "Numbuh 4's disguise worked. Far too well. Mr. Boss is forcing him to continue the ruse until the vows are spoken. By then, it won't matter."

"And he just went along with this?"

"It was either that, or face capital punishment for impersonating a royal Ubekian figure."

"And…do we want to know what that is?" Hoagie curiously asked. At Nigel's slow, solemn shake of his head, Hoagie gulped. "Oh _crud_."

"Numbuh 4 can't get married, he can't handle that kind of commitment!" Kuki panicked, her arms fluttering around anxiously. This was bad. Super, megaly _bad_. "What are we gonna do?"

No one had an answer to that. The whole group seemed to be ushered into a state of silent distress. Abby was doing her best to try and calm down Kuki, alleviating the girl's growing fears and concerns while trying to keep her own in check. Hoagie felt as if his feet were glued to the ground. Despite all his material and wisecracks he saved for rainy days, he concluded nothing he could say would brighten anyone's mood. Nigel feel into a rutted pace, stumbling back and forth on his feet, demanding his brain come up with a plan to fix all this. He was tactically blind, and the fact drove him mad. Numbuh 4-Below opted to say silent, figuring nothing she could say would make the situation better.

Numbuh Infinity seemed to be calmest of the bunch, oddly enough. One would assume that with his position and reputation, he would be freaking out, more so than anyone. That was not the case, however. Behind his visors, the boy was calculating all possible variables and options they had left. The few that were left, anyway. After what seemed like an eternity of dead quiet, the diplomatic broke the trance as he unveiled his last ditch salvation plan.

"I'll tell you exactly what we're going to do," he gravely intoned, catching everyone's ears. "We're going to minimize our losses."

Abby frowned. "Numbuh 5 don't like the sound of dat."

Nigel was wary of Infinity's tone as well, but nevertheless, he held up his hand to silence the girl as he let Infinity have the floor. "What do you suggest?"

"Mr. Boss' desperation to continue on with this wedding gives us a unique opportunity to salvage Kids Next Door relations here in this country. If he wants Numbuh 4 to dress up as the princess, I say we let him."

"Then what?"

"Simple. Once the wedding is underway, we let it slip that the current bride at the alter is an imposter."

Kuki's eyes widened. "We tell them Numbuh 4's pretending? Are you nuts?"

"No, just willing to do what's necessary," Infinity went on. "If they were to find out Numbuh 4 isn't really Yal'see, the wedding will be canceled, thereby stopping the Kola'ta's attempts to take control through marriage."

Abby's felt her fists clenching. "But if we tell them Wally's a fake, they'll lock him up. Or worse! And then they're gonna get ticked at us 'cause one of our operatives was pretending to be the princess!"

Infinity nodded at her points. "Which is why we'll give false evidence that Numbuh 4 was working for Mr. Boss, and deny any official KND involvement."

"No way!" Hoagie snapped. His frustration, long buried, boiled its way to the forefront of the boy's mind as he marched right up to Infinity and jabbed his finger in his face. "You've lost it if you think I'm gonna sit in the corner like a good boy while you sell out my best pal to save your own butt!"

"It's the KND's butt I'm saving!" Infinity growled as he pushed Hoagie's hand away. "This whole mission has been nothing but a foreign policy nightmare! Thanks to you idiots, we're at serious risk of tarnishing Ubekian relations completely, and losing access to one of the largest ice cream trading industries in the entire world! It's in everyone's best interests if we cut our loses before we dig our grave even deeper."

"So you just wanna leave Numbuh 4 to fend for himself?"

"I know it's a hard, but yes," Infinity said, firm in his conviction.

Abby snorted. "Gee, Numbuh 5 was startin' ta forget why she hated politicians so much. Thanks for the refresher."

"Think of me what you must, but it changes nothing. If we don't do this, then instead of just losing the Tipaun empire, we'll be handing it over to Mr. Boss. We can't win, but we'll make sure he loses as well. This wedding must be stopped."

"But Wally will be a goner!" Kuki stressed again, hysterical at the thought of abandoning their friend like that. "W-We just have to stop the wedding, right? We can just go in and get him then! We have the real Princess, so when we get back Wally, that doodie-head Mr. Boss won't have anyone to marry!"

"She's right!" Hoagie readily agreed. "No bride, means no deal. So we'd just need to go in there and grab him!"

"Out of the question," Infinity bristled. "There's far too many unknowns involved with that plan. With what's happened so far, I can't, in good conscience, let you move forward with such a reckless rescue mission."

"With all due respect, _sir,_" Abby sweetly replied, "you can take your good conscience and shove it where the sun don't shine."

"Enough!" Nigel finally called for a cease to all debates. "We're not going to accomplish anything with you all just standing around and arguing!" His eyes shut as he massaged his temples, trying to think of what they should do. "Say we try to rescue Numbuh 4, what are the chances of us managing to salvage Ubekian relations afterwords?"

"About as likely as Numbuh 4 getting a passing grade," Infinity scoffed. "And the day he gets an A is the day an armada of flying mutant space pigs attacks the Moonbase."

"So you're making fun of him now? Suggesting we leave him to rot wasn't enough?"

"I SAID SHUT IT!" Nigel roared, intimidating everyone into silence. "I'm still in command here. If anyone is making any sort of call, it's me!"

"Then I urge you to make the right one," Infinity responded. "This is bigger than all of us, Numbuh 1. It's in the best interests of the Kids Next Door to make sure we don't lose foothold in this region."

Nigel turned on his heel, escaping the combined stares of his team and Infinity both. His brows knitted together as he thought of every possible outcome. The loss of the Tipaun ice cream ring would be a devastating loss, one of which the Kids Next Door may never recover from. But while they could recover, regaining another friend like Wally was next to impossible.

Maybe he could learn to live on ice cream rations for a while.

"You're right about one thing, Infinity. This wedding must be stopped," Nigel droned, his hands firmly clasped behind his back. But before the diplomat could praise his decision, Nigel turned to his team, a certain fire in his eyes. "So suit up, team. We're going in to extract Numbuh 4."

"Alright!"

"Dat's what Numbuh 5's talkin' about!"

"Yay! We're gonna save Numbuh 4!"

Numbuh Infinity seemed shocked, a rare expression from him. "Y-You're…you're actually going along with this plan? Our relations with this country will be ruined!"

"Which is why I promise you we'll do our best to minimize that. Despite what you may think, my team works the best under high-risk situations. With any luck, we can slip in and out before they'll even know it's us."

"Counting on luck is what has gotten us into this mess!"

Nigel comfortably patted the boy's shoulder. "If we start sacrificing our own operatives, we'll be no better than Mr. Boss."

Infinity seemed torn, ready to cave in to Nigel's word. Sector V _was _suggested for the mission after all. For a moment, he looked ready to relent. But just as quick as it came, he quashed it down. Too much was at state to just give Sector V free reign.

"No. I don't believe that," Infinity coldly stated as he shrugged off Nigel's hand. "I'm disappointed, Numbuh 1. I thought you of all people would be willing to make the hard choices."

Nigel frowned, not liking the diplomat's tone. "I don't abandon friends."

"That's all too clear to me now," the suit wearing boy mumbled, more to himself than anyone else. "I'm sorry, but I'm afraid I can't allow you to continue with this reckless plan."

"I'm still in charge here, Infinity. If you attempt to deter mission progress, _I'm _afraid we'll have to make sure you don't interfere."

"Oh, what are you going to do?" Infinity tempted fate, throwing his hands in the air. "Lock me in the back of the trunk?"

* * *

"LET ME OUT OF HERE!" Infinity screamed, beating relentlessly against the RV trunk door. "YOU ARE IN VIOLATION OF SEVERAL RULES OF CONDUCT! LET ME OUT THIS INSTANT!"

Hoagie chuckled to himself as he dusted his hands off. He noticed Nigel's disapproving glare, and shrugged. "What? It was his idea."

Nigel sighed as he dragged his hand down the length of his face. "I am never going to hear the end of it from Numbuh 362."

"Heh heh, cheer up, boss," Abby encouraged as she playfully slapped his back. "Flash her one of those smiles, and she might let ya off easy."

"Or throw me out an airlock," Nigel groaned, remembering Rachel's threat the last time he went against regulations. The blonde Supreme Leader could get quite persuasive when angry. "Come on, we need to move quickly if we want to get Numbuh 4 out of there."

"I've always wanted to go to a Ubekian wedding!" Kuki giggled as she skipped along after the group. "Well, ever since six minutes ago, anyway! Is it invitation only?"

"Yes, but luckily, I was able to grab one off of those guards who were dragging us out," Nigel smirked as he produced a wedding invitation from his pocket. "Somehow, I knew it would come in handy."

"That was convenient," Abby said, raising an eyebrow. "What on Earth made you pickpocket a wedding invitation?"

"Does it really matter? Look, I have a plan. Come help me try to dig that robe we used before out of the snow. We're going to need to use it again."

"We're really breaking records for on-the-spot plans today, aren't we?" Hoagie felt the urge to comment on that particular bit of information. "What're our odds this time?"

"I feel it's best we just clap our hands and rely on blind optimism this time," Nigel grumbled as he pulled out the Ubekian robe he and Infinity made use of before. Still intact, good. At the thought of the diplomat, he sighed. "I wish Infinity would have come around. We could've really used him to pull this off."

"Perhaps I can help."

The children blinked, then turned towards Numbuh 4-Below. The Ubekian operative gauged the four before her, then cleared her throat as she spoke. "Your team has disgraced my country countless times since you have arrived here, and that's not even counting what you did to our Honorable Princess…"

Hoagie groaned. "Never gonna let us live that down, are ya?"

"BUT if it is one thing my people value, it is loyalty and trust. Numbuh 4 trusted your judgment by going along with your failed plan, and I am glad to see your loyalty to him makes you rush off to pull him from the fire." The girl rose her fist, making a hand-sign they couldn't quite recognize. "For whatever it is worth, you have my assistance in rescuing him."

Nigel was skeptic. "Just like that?"

"Just like that." The girl then smirked. "Besides, if it ticks off Numbuh Infinity, I'm game."

"Um, well, thanks then. And I am going to choose to just ignore how and why you can speak English all of a sudden." Nigel nodded, already factoring in 4-Below's offered help. "Yes, it's all coming together now. Alright, team. Emergency Operation: WEDDING CRASHER is go!"

"Ugh," Kuki childishly groaned as she took off after her friends. "I am NOT making up an acronym for that!"

"Hey, it got quiet. Where did you all go?" Numbuh Infinity's voice cried out from the trunk of the RV, apparently forgotten by the children gung-ho to save their friend. From inside, his attempts to escape became more frantic. "LET ME OUT! I SWEAR ONCE THIS IS OVER YOU'RE ALL GOING TO–" There was a sudden pause as he realized something. "_WHY IS THERE A NAKED ADULT IN HERE?_"

* * *

**Not exactly the end, but something to lead into it. There's something I've just come up with and want to see if I can work it in.  
**

**Next time is the end. For reals. Four-shots are becoming a habit for me.  
**

**_You were expecting something witty?~_  
**


	4. Chapter 4

_**My Big Fat Ubekian Wedding**_

_**(Part 1: The Aria)**_

* * *

He stood in the bedroom, looking at himself in the mirror critically. Far too critically for his liking, but hey, he was stuck here, bored, and had nothing else to do. Might as well give himself a once over, and maybe see what girls thought the big fuss about stupid wedding dresses were about. His long blonde hair (due part to the wig) was down and flawless, bangs professionally done around his face. He had no idea how Professor Triple Extra Large knew how to style hair –fake hair at that– but he figured there were things he was much, _much_ better off not knowing.

The frilly dress itself was fitted and expensive as crud, making him look even stupider and more sissier than he was when his so called 'friends' forced him to put the dress on. The undershirt the adults made him wear to give him a more _feminine _appearance was barely noticeable, but it too was expensive and well-tailored. And it itched like crazy. For the third time of the hour, Wally's hand strayed down towards his hindquarters to give it a good scratch.

But of course, like every other time he tried to relieve the sensation…

_SMACK_

"Ow!" Wally whined as his palm was slapped away. He looked away from the mirror to angrily gaze up at his mutant adult groomer. "C'mon! It's startin' ta chafe down there!"

The Professor could only shake his head disapprovingly. "Tsk tsk tsk. I've told you, it's not proper for a Princess to act in such a grotesque manner. Trust me, I know from experience," the insane man chuckled. "But enough about my college days, let's see what we can do about this hairdo," he hummed to himself as he procured his comb. "Honestly, so many split ends. What did you children make this wig out of? A random mop you found lying around?"

Wally's eyes shifted. "Maybe…"

On the other end of the room, Mr. Boss himself was doing his best to make himself look presentable and trying his darnedest to block out the blond kid's frustratingly grating whining and moaning. Despite how unhinged the Professor claimed to be, he didn't trust Numbuh 4 to just stand there and go along with the wedding, even when faced with possible capital punishment. To insure nothing would go awry, he opted to keep a vigil over the wild-boy personally. As long as he was present, the operative wouldn't dare try anything.

The platoon of elite ice cream men paroling every inch just right outside every possible escape point didn't hurt, either.

"Where is that stupid tie?" Mr. Boss grumbled as he fumbled around inside his travel pack. He didn't know why his wife insisted on packing his things for him. He forgets his medication _one time_, and suddenly she's controlling everything because she thinks he'll get a heart-attack.

Suddenly, he paused, pulling out a brown lunch bag with a heart-shaped note attached. "What the–she packed me a lunch? How old does she think I am? Six?" he grumbled. Curiosity getting the better of him, he started digging around the bag, his face lighting up as he went through the bag's contents. "Oh, _cookies!_"

"Boss?"

"Ah!" he gasped, jerking up his head to glare at the guard poking his head out the door. "What is it?"

The ice cream man flinched at Mr. Boss' tone, but continued, nevertheless. "Uh, these Ubekians are wondering if the, er, 'Princess'," he said with matching finger quotes, "is ready."

"Tell 'em we're almost done. Now let me get ready!" he growled, scaring off the guard. He finally found his tie, and went to clipping it on. "Hey Doc, is the brat ready to go or what?"

"First of all, it is _Professor_," Tripe Extra Large haughty corrected. "I did not go to college to be called 'Doctor'. That's just insulting."

Mr. Boss gave a shrewd stare. "Your resume says you got kicked out of college."

"No, I _dropped out_ of college. They let me in, I saw myself out. There's a difference."

"Whatever! Look, is he ready to pull this sham off?" Mr. Boss raged.

"Oh, we should be done any moment now. Just a few finishing touches, and I need to tighten up the dress in the back," the Professor happily replied as he reached for a pair of strings hanging off the stems. Wally, who was contemplating just jumping out the window, felt the air rush out of his lungs as Triple Extra Large heaved on the strings.

"Excellent," Mr. Boss grinned. His hand reached into the pockets of his suit, and he pulled out decent sized parchment of paper. At the top, embroiled in fancy print, was the title of the marriage contact he worked out between the Tipuan and Kola'ta families. After buying out a few lawyers, and locking Prince Yul'sha in his room, he had made sure that he was the only one who knew the full weight of the fine print of the contract.

It was simply business; business he had mastered down to a science.

"This day is goin' to be _perfect_," he mused to himself as he kissed the contract. "The kind of day I've had coming far too long."

"All those snobs will gather round." He chuckled as he sneered at Wally, amusement evident in his tone, "While you look pretty in that gown."

The blond only made a guttural sound in response.

Mr. Boss leaned down to peer at the window, smirking as he watched all of the Tipaun family enter the main hall to celebrate the wedding festivities. "Just keep up the act, and nothing can go wrong."

* * *

"Uk'ku nil!" a Ubekian door-guard greeted cheerfully as another guest made their way inside the compound. He shuffled a bit, hoping to get some body heat flowing, and went back to staring blandly ahead as he managed the patrons flowing inside for the wedding. It was an exciting time for the families right now, and he had been instructed to take every precaution and make sure everything went smoothly.

As he thought on the evening's events, he nearly broke his stoney facade as his mind wandered to the guards he had ended up replacing. The last two doormen had let an imposter slip in right under their noses. What was worse, it had turned out to be two children disguised as a noblemen. How disgraceful it must have been for them, to know they had been fooled by mere children. The thought almost made him keel over laughing. Luckily, the foreign guards the western businessman had brought along had assured them the situation had been dealt with.

Now with the children thrown out, their princess returned, and the rebellious Prince Yul'sha under heavy watch, nothing would ruin this day.

The guard was snapped out of his thoughts when an odd looking noblewoman came waddling up the steps. Her arms shook as she seemed to be having trouble keeping balance, but she managed to regain her posture, and continued an awkward trek straight towards the door. Several things the guard noticed were the woman's face looked incredibly young; almost that of a child's. The other odd quirk he spotted, besides her clumsy footsteps, was that her slim torso stretched out into oddly wide hips. If he didn't know any better, he would wager there was something else under those robes.

"Muli!" he guard said as he stopped the woman. She flinched, but managed to face him. He frowned, his eyes sparkling with suspicion. "Cal'ho johl?"

"Er, uk! No-sa lumi ju'kin," the woman nervously chuckled. Her hands fumbled around her robe, looking frantic when she couldn't find something she was searching for. For some reason, the guard blinked, missing a lighting fast movement coming from underneath the woman's robe. When he opened his eyes, the woman was smiling cheekily as she passed him a card. "Inko nu'lu ja'gini, nid?"

The guard took the card. As he inspected it, he nodded as he recognized it as a formal invitation to the wedding. He bowed as he stepped aside to allow the noblewoman entry. "Uk'ku nil."

The woman nodded, then made her way inside. The guard turned back to his post, and let his mind wander. Once again, it ventured back towards those two other guards. It was just too hilarious. What kind of idiot would be fooled by a couple of children wearing some tacky noble robe? They were letting any old schmuck into the ranks of the royal guard these days.

Once inside, the "woman" sighed a breath of relief as a head poked out from under the robe. Hoagie shook his head as he looked up to his comrade. "I can't believe they fell for that. Twice even!"

"Keep moving towards the main hall," Numbuh 4-Below instructed. Hoagie's head disappeared behind the robe, and the two were on their way again. The girl's heart was pounding; never before had she been on mission where so much hung in the balance. "I hope your leader knows what he is doing."

"Don't worry," Hoagie whispered, "Numbuh 1 always knows what he's doing."

Nigel had to admit that he had no idea what he was doing as he, Abby, and Kuki dropped down over the wall. The three moved with precision as they rolled behind a set of bushes, avoiding a group of guards walking by. Taking their chance, they made a mad dash towards the backdoor of the nearest building, and filtered inside before anyone could even catch their shadows.

As the girls barricaded the door, Nigel hugged the wall as he peaked around the corner. After a quick sweep, he motioned for the girls once he noticed the hall was clear. As the made it towards the end of corridor, the boy was shocked to find the exit had been locked off. His frustration boiling over, he gave the frame a solid kick.

"This day was going to be perfect," he snipped sarcastically, his head lowering in shame. "The kind of day that we've wanted for far too long." His fist clenched as he thought of Mr. Boss' smug visage taunting him. "But now we'll lose to that snake…"

Abby patted Nigel's shoulder, directing him towards the window to their left. "C'mon boss, or we'll be late."

Kuki watched as the two forced the window open and hopped back outside into the cold. The small girl thought back on the mission so far, and let out a tired sigh as she followed their lead. "It's hard to think how everything has just gone wrong."

* * *

"I'm not sure he can pull off this outfit," the Professor gave his opinion as he gave Wally one final look. His expression was far from pleased with his handiwork. "Should have gone with a summer."

Mr. Boss lit another one his cigars, sparing Triple Extra Large an eye-roll. "I could less about the dress."

"And what about the cake?" the Professor asked, bringing up the topic of sweets. "The cater just vanished into thin air for some odd reason. It may not get here in time for the reception."

Mr. Boss face-palmed. "We won't partake in any cake!"

"I don't even get cake?" Wally spoke up. "You guys are horrible!"

Professor Triple Extra Large groaned as he crossed his arms. He can't believe he expected Mr. Boss to follow Ubekian traditions. "Well then, what about the vows?"

"Vows?" Mr. Boss mused. After a quick moment, he jotted something down on a patch of paper, then handed it to the Professor. "Just make sure they buy it when he says:"

The Professor was in the middle of proofreading the hastily written lines when Wally suddenly snatched them out of his hand. The mildly miffed blond decided to read them out loud himself. He was the one who had to say them after all.

"'No matter what, through thick and thin, I'll stick with him until the end?" Wally read aloud with disgust. "Gross! This is girly and sappy."

Agitated, Mr. Boss jerked the boy up by the collar of his dress. "The truth is I don't care what you think at all!" He then dropped him, spitting out commands as the blond picked himself up. "You will play the role as bride. This time I won't be denied!"

He turned towards the mirror to look over his suit. At the thought of his oncoming victory at gaining the Tipuan trading empire, Mr. Boss allowed himself to crackle gleefully. "And then all that ice cream will be all mine!"

Wally dusted himself off as the Professor rushed up to tidy up his wedding dress. "Geez, what a nut-job! Why does it sound like he's singing?"

Triple Extra Large shrugged. "We villains do that from time to time."

* * *

Over in the main hall, both teams had finally made it inside. On the lower floor, Hoagie and Numbuh 4-Below were trying to push past all the guests to get to the alter-chamber. The chubby boy had to carefully plot his steps. One wrong move, and their disguise would be blown. 4-Below herself had to double as being his eyes, and making sure some of the more rowdy patrons did end up knocking her over.

The girl grit her teeth as they maneuvered through the crowd, hating at how long it was taking to move past all these people. Timing was everything for this operation, and they were seriously risking the possibility of failing to meet their window of opportunity. "We must get in place before it's too late."

Above them, a royal guard was sent flying backwards into a broom closet. Before he even knew what was going on, Nigel and Abby slammed the door in face, locking him inside.

As they worked on making sure the guard couldn't escape, Kuki paced back and forth as she let her worried thoughts and fears consume her. "What if we can't save the day?"

"Numbuh 3, trust me when I say," Nigel moved towards the girl in an effort to bury her anxiety and give her hope. "We're not about to lose him, to an adult who wants to use him. For crimes, Mr. Boss is gonna pay."

Kuki sniffled, but nodded. Nigel returned the gesture, and the three broke off into a sprint to the stairwell. "For we must save the fake bride. This wedding we can't let slide."

"We better hurry," Abby cut in as they all took a leap. The three landed on the stair railings, and went into a downwards, circular grind as they sped towards the bottom. "To save the sport's behind!"

As they neared the bottom, they noticed a guard rail for a balcony about a floor up. They also noticed a group of ice cream men mingling on the floor below them right as they exited the stairs. Fortunately, for once, their backs were facing them. Abby peered up to see the hanging chandelier, and acted quickly. She whipped out a grappling hook poised as a hair-dryer, and aimed it to hook on the hanging crystals of the ornament.

Nigel and Kuki grabbed on to the girl, and as they hopped off the stair-railing, they broke into an upwards swing towards the balcony. At the height of their arch, Abby pulled in the grappling hook, and the children landed into a roll as they hit the deck. Kuki and Abby continued forward, while Nigel looked down to make sure the guards hadn't noticed their aerial display.

* * *

Outside the entire compound itself, there was another commotion going on unknown to everyone occupied with the wedding frenzy.

Near the back of Sector V's RV, the trunk door was jiggling with a surprising amount of force. After a couple of seconds, there was a faint clicking noise. All motion stopped for a bit, then continued ten-fold. There was a series of well-place kicks coming from the inside, and after the forth blow, the trunk door popped open, a small body flying out.

"Gah! Oooh, sweet merciful freedom!" Numbuh Infinity cried as he hit the ground. He was so happy, he let notions of kissing the ground cross his mind. In fact, he almost did. But then he was suddenly reminded of _why _he was stuck in the trunk in the first place.

"Why those no good, backstabbing, DOO-DOO BRAINS!" Infinity screeched to the heavens. His face was contorted with unadulterated rage and contempt. He was just so angry! "Arrgh! I feel like I want to punch something!"

"Uhh, uki nop pul'su?" came the muffled reply from inside the trunk. The half-naked Ubekian official the others had knocked out had finally started to come around. He had lots of questions on his mind. Who had done this to him? What happened? When did it happen? Where were his robes? Why in the name of all that was holy was he in nothing but his underwear? Sadly, the only answer to any of these inquires the poor man would get was Numbuh Infinity's fist.

"Wow! I see why Numbuh 4 enjoys this so much!" Infinity breathed as he let the adrenaline wash over him. It reminded him of his days as a field operative. Oh, things were soo much more fun back then. Back then, all matters involving diplomacy were solved with fists, and big cool laser guns.

As his nostalgia began to wear off, Infinity became highly aware that he had just knocked out the official. Eyes shifting, the boy pushed the adult back into the trunk, slowly closed the lid, and followed it all up by locking it.

With that taken care of, he sighed as he reached for his bow-tie. The normally red, sharp edged piece of clothing transformed at his touch. It folded, expanded, then folded some more until it was in the shape of some odd communication device. Gathering his wits, he pressed into the device, then held it to his ear.

"It's me," he began. He suddenly frowned. "Samuel Jackson–WHO DO YOU _THINK _IT IS?" he roared, clearly not in the mood for this. "Look, a lot has happened…then pause it, this is tad more important than your video games, 74.239!" He was surrounded by idiots.

_Surrounded_.

"It's been a disaster, quite frankly…yes, my evaluation is done," Infinity's face softened, returning to its stoic facade. "Things went further out of control than projected, but he's made his stance clear. When it comes down to it, Numbuh 1 will still put his teammates above the mission priority…no, genius, that's far from what we wanted…no. No, I'm not writing this off as a complete loss just yet."

Infinity waited for the boy on the line to speak his piece before continuing. "That won't be necessary. Look, while I was locked in the trunk, I–no, I'm not explaining that; it's not important– I had an idea. Re-access the profiles. We're not just evaluating Numbuh 1 anymore, we're evaluating _all _of Sector V," Infinity ordered with conviction, his eyes sprinkling with hidden motive.

"I'll explain later. Look, I have to try and find some way to salvage Ubekian relations here…Why? Because written projections show that a loss of support would be disastrous. You should know, _you wrote them!_" he groaned, just about to hang up.

"I've got to go. The wedding is about to start and–security leak? What security leak?" Infinity paused mid-step, his eyes somewhat wide. "What was lost…who is _they_?…what kind of name is Flatline–look, just fix it!…No, I honestly don't care who it got leaked to! Just find them, scramble their brains, and FIX IT!" Without another word, he hung up. But right when he was about to take a step, his communicator buzzed.

"For the love of-what is it? I'm in the middle of something, so this had better be–mommy?" Infinity stared down at the communicator in pure shock. "_How_ on Earth did you get this num–" he paused, remembering the 'security leak' he was just informed about.

"Ah, hold that thought, mommy–Yes, I love you too, just gimme a second." He redialed a number, hoping 74.239 would pick up. "Come on…yes! It's me! Belay that last order; do not scramble my mother's brains. I repeat, do not scramble my mother's brains!"

* * *

Mr. Boss walked down the corridor with utmost pride. Behind him was Professor Triple Extra Large, donning his High Priest robes in order to effectively carry out his duties. And in between them Wally, who was fuming while looking as fabulous as a boy dressed up as a princess bride could be. One might ask why he wasn't bailing and trying to escape. If any did ask, he would simply point them to the several dozen ice cream men flanking him and escorting the small party down the hall.

The blond wanted to hold out hope his friends were up to something. Anything that meant he didn't have to go through with this. He trusted Nigel, he really did. But being this close to being married off against his will was kind of deterring his thought process.

"Finally, the moment has arrived," Mr. Boss chuckled as he mockingly pinched the boy's cheeks. "For you to be one lucky 'bride'." Wally attempted to bite the man's finger, but raising three children–one of which whom happened to be Numbuh 86–had done wonders for Mr. Boss' reflexes.

In the alter-chamber itself, Nigel, Kuki, and Abby stepped out from behind the balcony curtains to get a good feel for the area. They had expected a few people to be wandering around; just some designers who were putting finishing touches on everything.

They were a little more than mildly shocked to find that that wasn't the case. Instead of just a few people, _hundreds _of guests and officials had already flocked into the room. There was a mild chatter going on through the air, and it looked as if everyone had already found their seats.

Nigel frantically studied the rows and rows of wedding guests. "Oh it's started, are we late?"

Kuki's eyes watered. "They will seal poor Wally's fate!"

Abby slammed a fist down. "And all that ice cream will be–"

"-Mine. All mine, heh heh heh," Mr. Boss chortled to himself as he and his entourage entered the chamber. The appearance of him and the "princess" was cue for all in attending to take their seats. As they waltzed down the aisle, some more respectful members of the crowd gave slight bows to Wally's presence. Not that it gave him much comfort.

They finally stopped at the end of the aisle, standing on the left side of a wooden podium that stood smack dab in the center line of the entire chamber. Mr. Boss took up a stance at his side, sending warning glances his way every now and then. He would lock his eyes with Wally's, then flick over to the group of ice cream men all taking seats along the front rows. Wally frowned in protest, but made no sudden movements. The moment Professor Triple Extra Large took his place at the podium, he eventually began tuning out the whole affair. He would give anything to have this day turn out to be nothing more than some horrible nightmare.

As the last few guests took their seats, one late entry finally made her way into the room. The disguised Numbuh 4-Below carefully directed Hoagie through the main chamber. She hissed when she noticed everyone had already been seated. If they did not find a secluded seat now, they would eventually draw some unwanted attention.

"Exsu'ikl, pardo'nou," she apologized as she maneuvered them through a stuffed row. They had to push through a lot of folks, but that corner at the end looked absolutely perfect for what they had to pull off. "Exsu'ikl, exsu–UAG NIK!" she snapped at a random man who made a rude gesture. Ignoring the idiot, the girl carefully directed Hoagie's footsteps until they finally came to an empty seat.

"Okay, here is fine," she whispered. Her foothold suddenly disappeared, and she found her body plopping down onto the cushioned bench. She straightened her robe around her quickly as Hoagie moved under her, and soon enough, a plump body had sat itself secretly next to her.

"Finally," Hoagie breathed as he massaged his shoulders. "Man, those boots were murder on my neck."

"Quiet!" 4-Below hushed as she clamped her hand over the boy's flapper. She carefully scanned the people around her, then looked back to Hoagie. "This is the most obscured position I could find, but that does not mean you can sit there and run your mouth."

"Keep it on the hush-hush. Got it," Hoagie sourly nodded as the girl pulled her hand away. He buried himself deeper into his seat, not wanting to risk anyone spotting him. He looked towards the front of the alter, only to have his eyes widen in shock at the sight of his best pal on stage in a wedding gown. "Oh no, it's already started. Mr. Boss has him up there on center stage!"

"Calm yourself," 4-Below pacified, "the wedding has not begun. The bridal party are simply taking positions. The formal events do not officially start until the groom party arrives at the alter."

Hoagie visibly relaxed. "Whew, then we're not too late." Doubling checking to make absolutely sure no one was looking, he pulled out his 2x4 communicator and began signaling for Nigel and his team. "Keep me updated, I'm letting Numbuh 1 know we're ready to go."

* * *

"Oh no no," Kuki fretted as she paced back and forth, leaving a slightly visible rut in the floor. "What are we gonna do now? Wally's gonna get married, we won't get any more ice cream from Ubeki-stan-smith-stan or whatever, and worst of all, I'm not invited to the reception!"

"Uh, jus' chill out Numbuh 3," Abby hesitantly replied. "We'll think of something."

Kuki looked up to the girl with watery eyes, a slight hiccup in her voice. "W-We will?

"Course we will!" Abby smiled, her eyes flicking over to Nigel for some support. "Right, boss?"

"Where is Numbuh 2?" Nigel mumbled to himself, paying no attention to the girls' dramatics. His fingers drummed against the railing of the balcony, scanning the audience for his teammates. But there were too many people to instantly pick up anyone specific. That, and the fact that he was wearing sunglasses in a dimly lit indoor area wasn't helping at all. He really needed to stop doing that. "We should have heard from him and Numbuh 4-Below–"

"_This Shadow Fox reporting in. Come in Flying Eagles._"

"Speak of the devil." As quick as he could, Nigel reached for his on communicator to answer the call. "Drop the team codenames, Numbuh 2. We don't have the time. What's your status?"

Silence.

"I said, status report."

More silence.

"…Numbuh 2, now is not the–"

"_I spent five minutes coming up with those names!_"

"And we'll waste five more minutes that could be used to extract Numbuh 4 by arguing about this again! Now give me a status report!"

"_You know, just because our best friend is about to be married at the diplomatic equivalent of a shotgun wedding doesn't mean you have to be such a killjoy!_"

"Numbuh 4-Below, a little help here?" Nigel requested. He then gave a smug grin when he registered the sound of a muffled smacking noise over the line. "Now, about that status report."

"_Uh huh,_" Hoagie grumpily replied. "_We're a tad behind schedule, but we've made it into the alter-chamber. No one seems to notice, or even care, that we're here._"

"What about the wedding? Numbuh 4's at the alter with Mr. Boss and the Professor. How underway is it?"

"_According to Numbuh 4-Below, nothing's really started yet. Things don't get rolling until the groom-to-be shows up. I guess they do things a little reversed opposed to how we're used to._"

"Then we're not too late," Nigel sighed in relief. It was way too early in the plan to label that as a success, but it was a very good start opposed to how everything else had been lately. "The game plan is still on. Tell Numbuh 4-Below to keep you updated on the wedding and report any necessary information back to me. Me and the girls are moving into position. Good luck."

"_Don't forget to take some good snapshots!_"

Nigel clicked off the comm-link and turned back to his teammates. "Okay, team, we've still got our window open. Time to get started."

"Yay!" Kuki cheered, jumping to her feet and doing a complete one-eighty from her depressed and dejected slump. She cracked her knuckles, and began smirking with wicked glee. "Let's _do this_."

If Nigel was at all perturbed by the girl's sudden spark of enthusiasm, he did an excellent job of not letting it show. "We all know what the plan is?"

Abby nodded. "Numbuh 2 and 4-Below are gonna keep us updated on the wedding and stall as long as they can. While they're doing dat, me and Numbuh 3 are gonna sneak into the bridal chamber and try and replace two bridesmaids."

"Correct. Once you've replaced them, just wait until you can get close enough to Numbuh 4 to grab him." He then reached into his pocket, and pulled out a smoke-bomb the size of a baseball. "I'll be working my way around here to find to perfect spot to cause a diversion. Once this thing goes off, you grab Numbuh 4, and we all get the heck out of here."

Abby had a hard time repressing her oncoming smirk. "Simple and crude don't sound like your style, boss."

"We lost the luxury of being subtle when the princess got stuck in a coma," Nigel muttered as he stowed away the smoke-bomb. "Infinity and I passed the bridal-chamber earlier; it's down the stairs, through the hall and the sixth door on the left. Now, we're kind of exposed out on this balcony, so I'd like to do this sometime today. Anymore questions?"

Kuki exuberantly waved her hand around. "Can I keep the bridesmaid dress?"

"Just go," Nigel groaned. Deciding to spare her leader some torture, Abby pulled a curious Kuki away so they all could get started with their hastily slapped together operation. The bald boy glanced over his shoulder, once again analyzing the ground floor. His eyes softened as they traveled to Wally, but then hardened once they landed on Mr. Boss.

Down below, the villain in the expensive suit himself grumbled aloud as he waited for the show to get a move on. Honestly, the brat was here, the Professor was all ready to say a few cheesy lines to make it official, yet they just had to wait on the fat little groom himself to grace them with his presence. Kids today, and their flawed perception of being 'fashionably late'. All hogwash.

Mr. Boss tensed slightly when he got the distinct notion that a pair of eyes were watching him. Like a hawk preying on some unexpected snake. He snapped his head up, glancing all around the room, but no one was paying attention to him. The guests were too caught up with how close 'peace' was between the two families.

He glanced up to the balcony, but only saw a brigade of his hired help coming out to take up positions. Mr. Boss' orbs narrowed in slight suspicion, but turned his head back to the alter, taking a puff on his cigar as he did. A moment later, he would roll his eyes as he put the object out once the Professor sent a condescending glare his way.

* * *

"Release me!" Prince Yul'sha snapped as he tried to wiggle his way out of the restraints the guards had put on him. "You all shall pay for this!"

After the incident in Yal'see's room, things had went downhill very fast for the poor prince. Mr. Boss had convinced his family elders that Yul'sha was just too 'destructive and bent on ruining the wedding'. It was true, of course, but not for the reasons the shrewd businessman was making them out to be. Anxious for peace the wedding was promised to bring, his elders had agreed it would best if Yul'sha was not allowed to attend the ceremony. The only loose end was Yul'sha himself, but Mr. Boss assured them that he would handle the prince as delicately as possible.

Unfortunately for Yul'sha, Mr. Boss' definition of 'delicately' involved throwing him into his room, slapping a pair of chains on his wrists, cuffing him to the support beam, and leaving a pair of armed ice cream men behind to make sure he didn't get any wise ideas.

"Oh, be quiet," one of the guards grumbled, firing a blast of choco-chunk at Yul'sha's feet as a warning. "I won't miss next time."

"Dear me, you're going to shot me with choco-chunk and raspberry delight. I'm _terrified_," Yul'sha mockingly spat. "You are aware my family owns the largest ice cream trading empire in this section of the world, right? The kinds of torturous methods we've created using popsicles would have you _weeping _for mercy!"

The guard sighed at Yul'sha's response. He holstered his weapon, and looked towards his partner. "See? This is why I hate guarding teenagers; they're too apathetic. They see a guy in bulked out, pink, ice cream elite armor and just laugh."

"I know. My little girl is sixteen, and she doesn't respect me at all," the other man lamented. "She used to beg me for rides in the company van all the time. Y'know, be my co-pilot and play the little ice cream jingle? Complete opposite after she hit high-school. Had to pick her up in the same van one day, and now she hates me because she claims I embarrassed her."

"Hey man, you didn't deserve that. You work hard."

"Yes," Yul'sha interjected, "walking around with ice cream based weapons and getting humiliated by children must be an exhausting work-day."

"You shut up!" the first guard snapped. "First of all, these are very high-end and expensive forms of weaponry. The inner mechanisms of such devices are highly sophisticated. And manly. VERY manly."

"Yeah! They can shoot sprinkles!"

"And secondly, never ever has any snot nosed brat got the drop on us."

It was at that moment where Numbuh Infinity decided to make his timely entrance by crashing in throw the window.

_CRASH!_

"IT'S A KID!"

"I NOTICED!"

"HE JUST CRASHED RIGHT THROUGH THE WINDOW!"

"Yeah…I know. I was there."

"HE TOTALLY GOT THE DROP ON US!"

"…_wow_. State the obvious some more, Greg."

"HE'S CHARGING UP SOME WEIRD, FREAKY SCI-FI LIKE LASER THING AND AIMING IT RIGHT FOR YOUR MID-SECTION!"

"See, there's this thing called an _indoor voice_. Maybe you should look into–wait, what?"

The guard was suddenly introduced to a painful world that involved an electric surge of blinding light. It was over in a second, but it felt like it lasted much longer to the guard who experienced it. The man was reduced to a smoking crisp, and there was a noticeable scent in the air that was almost reminiscent of bacon. The guard could not enjoy the smell, however, as his body slowly, and comically, inched closer and closer to the floor. He picked up quite a bit of speed before he the hi the wooden planks with a resounding 'thump'.

The second ice cream man looked up from his partner's unconscious form, to the culprit behind the attack. There, standing amongst shards of broken glass, was a small boy in an oddly particular black suit. The guard gulped at the intimidating glare in the kid's shades, and quivered at the sight of the shiny dart-gun-like weapon that just caused his partner to fall flat.

Before the guard could yell any more bits of information, Numbuh Infinity fired off another small dart at the man's mid-section as well. As soon as the dart made contact, a dazzling light show of stunning blue electricity danced and shimmered around the man's body. After a second, he found himself in the same state as his partner.

Infinity simply holstered his weapon. The device was a special hand-crafted stun weapon that was designed by a scientist he knew all too well. The weapon was small, easy to hide on person, and shot tiny suction darts that let off volts of tingling electricity. When Infinity asked exactly how many volts each burst gave off, the scientist answered, "One point Twenty-one gigawatts."

When Infinity then asked how could anyone possibly _live_ through that kind of shock, the scientist scientifically and eloquently said, "Hey…_shut up_."

Yul'sha, who had been silent throughout Infinity's entrance, suddenly frowned. "Fantastic, another Kids Next Door operative. Here to mock the 'evil' teenager some with more faulty evidence?"

"No. I have no sense of humor I'm aware of," Infinity blandly replied as he approached the teenager. "I need your help."

"I don't know how you foreginers do things, but here, we usually _free_ the person before demanding their assistance. The process is tried and true, I see no reason to deviate from it."

"And with what's happened in the past couple of hours, can you honestly say you'll help me once you're free?"

"…What could you possibly want?"

"A way to stop this wedding without completely tanking my organization's relationship with your family," Infinity explained, sounding more desperate than he could ever recall. "My associates –and I use that term in the loosest way possible– have gone on a suicide mission to stop the wedding by hijacking the operative Mr. Boss is using as a puppet for your sister."

"So they're stopping the wedding? I fail to see why that is a bad thing."

"Because you all fail to see the bigger picture! Even if they managed to stop the wedding by extracting Numbuh 4, there's no way to stop Mr. Boss from distorting things to make it seem like the KND was the bad guy. He'll make it seem like we're trying to stop peace to bloom between the families!"

"Still not seeing why I should concern myself with this."

"You know as well as I do we'll just be back here again, only the KND won't be in the country to help stop the wedding next time!"

"Ha! If you idiots hadn't been here at all, then there wouldn't even be a wedding to stop! I had my sister hidden before you ruined all my plans to keep her safe!"

"You can't honestly expect to hide her forever!"

"I will as long as I need to!"

"But if you help me, you won't!" Infinity was down to his last chips. "The Kids Next Door are not your enemy! Listen, if you assist me, then we can make sure Yal'see stays completely hidden. She'll be more secure than anywhere in this country."

"Where on Earth could you possibly hide my sister that I haven't thought of already?"

Infinity let a bit of smugness seep into his voice. "The moon, for one. Not exactly on Earth, but I figure you get my point."

Yul'sha paused at that. Normally, he'd call the boy crazy for suggesting such a thing. Children on the moon? Impossible. But considering these children had found his sister at an unmapped fortress, went through an army of royal guards, and had weaponry far beyond his imagination, Yul'sha found himself becoming a bit more open-minded.

Plus, he could hide his sister in _space_. Who would think to look for a princess in _space_?

"She will be safe?" he began to relent,"They will not know of her location?"

"Trust me," Infinity replied, his tone somewhat somber, "the type of people I work for know how the make someone disappear."

Yul'sha instantly decided he did not want to know what that exactly meant. "What exactly do you need me to do?"

"You've known about this whole thing longer than anyone of us, surely you must have had a back-up plan in case they found your sister."

"I may have a contingency plan or two, yes," Yul'sha admitted. "What did you have in mind?"

"I can't stop Sector V, and it'd be useless to try. All I need is something…_anything _to provide cover for their escape," Infinity elaborated. "Something that can't be connected back to the KND. Something you have to provide. Do you have something like that?"

Yul'sha narrowed his eyes in thought, but then sighed as he hesitantly looked down to the floor. "I may…know someone who can 'help'. Someone, whom if aware of this wedding, would stop at nothing to make sure it does not come to pass."

Infinity blinked. That sounded like just the person he needed. Someone to pin all the blame on if things went south. Which they were going to. It wasn't a question of 'if', it was a question of 'when'. "Is he trustworthy?"

"No! In fact, I had hoped I would only have to call on him as a last resort."

"This situation qualifies as last resort material," Infinity grumbled as he moved to free Yul'sha. "Can he get here in time?"

"He should be nearby. Needs to be close to keep an eye on my sister, after all," Yul'sha groaned, really not liking the prospect of having to call on this certain individual. But desperate times called for even more desperate measures. "This day just keeping more interesting…"

* * *

**This is the end. It just happens to be split up in three parts.**

**No more author's notes from this point, just story. Unhinged story. Thank you to those who waited, to those who took the time to read. I hope you enjoyed this, and the rest of the story.  
**


	5. Chapter 5

_**My Big Fat Ubekian Wedding**_

_**(Part 2: The Intermission)**_

* * *

Inside the alter-chamber, Hoagie's gaze stayed ever vigilant as he watched the room. Everything was mostly calm. It seemed all the guests had finally settled in and the only thing missing was the groom himself. The chubby boy glanced in Wally's direction, and suppressed a chuckle at how Mr. Boss had to keep nudging the boy to keep him awake. That was one way to skip through the boring parts of a wedding, at least.

Suddenly, Hoagie blinked as he looked up to Mr. Boss and Wally again. "Hey, why is Mr. Boss still up there? Shouldn't the father be giving the bride away?"

Numbuh 4-Below looked surprised. "Of course not. The family's acting financial adviser oversees all aspects of the wedding. This way, the bridal party can't skimp on the dowry. It is one of our most scared traditions…well, ever since the Gichi'Kur wedding scandal back in 1929, anyway."

"What happened?"

"My class isn't that far into our studies. Something about eloping, a sixteen million dollar dowry, and a 'stock market', whatever that is."

Anymore insight into that interesting page of Ubekian history was interrupted when the doors of the alter-chamber slowly creaked opened. A hush befell the entire room as the groom party finally arrived. At the front of the entourage was a lanky sort of adult escorting a young boy whom Hoagie guessed was around their age group. It had to be the groom.

The young Ubekian boy was lavished in the finest royal wedding attire money could buy. He walked with a keen air of grace, and superiority. Despite a girth that rivaled a certain pilot's, the child managed to carry himself in a proper, and daresay, respectful sort of manner. He was the defining image of decorum, charm, and dignity.

The keyword in that last sentence was, _was_, for the moment he started picking his nose halfway down the aisle, that image of elegance was lost forever.

"Apparently he skipped a few classes of Royal Mannerism 101," Hoagie said, grimly disgusted as the boy continued digging for gold even when they stood at the front of the alter. "I'm gonna tell Numbuh 1 the groom's here. Keep me updated if anything changes."

Numbuh 4-Below nodded as she watched the events unfold. Everything started go exactly as expected. The Professor truly did fit the requirements of a High Priest. The way he regaled of the ancient and scared wedding prayer was as moving as it was beautiful. It was so touching, tears welled up in her eyes. Who knew an insane, ice-cream obsessed maniac had such respect for their most honored religious practices.

However, Numbuh 4-Below was jarred back to the reality of the situation when Mr. Boss let out a suspicious series of coughs. The grumpy businessman gave a few vague hand signals, which caused the Professor to pause, wink, and carry on with what he was saying. After a few seconds, 4-Below's face reddened with fury once she realized what was going on.

"That big, stupid, _hu-boon-do_!" she all but snapped. "He's completely ignoring tradition and rushing to the vows!"

"He's what!" Hoagie gasped, turning his gaze to the alter. He couldn't understand a word Professor Triple Extra Large was saying, but upon seeing Mr. Boss' growing smile, he knew it meant bad news for them. "He can't, the guys aren't in position yet! Why isn't anyone saying anything?"

"It is a business deal in the clothing of a wedding, I doubt anyone here truly cares. Gal'kinis! All of them!"

Years of experience serving in Sector V had molded Hoagie to the point where he wasn't surprised when everything began to go wrong. "There's gotta be something we can do. We're supposed to be stalling, for Pete's sake!"

Numbuh 4-Below tapped her chin in thought, running through every possibility in her mind. Suddenly, she snapped her fingers before pushing Hoagie down towards the floor.

"Quick, take cover. I'm about to try something so inconceivably stupid that it _has _to work," she intoned. Hoagie wasn't sure he was totally confident with that line of thinking, but what choice did he have? Without further argument, the boy ducked under the bench while Numbuh 4-Below stood up and cupped her hands over her mouth.

"Akin'vou dovah!" she called out, interrupting the Professor and gathering the attention of the crowd. "Yuik luak oku flim gar nak! Yo tor shul muil ouri yol so-vin. Gar'grk, ka'nul Kol-Kol. Seni ve snu-snu!"

She was met with a stunned silence, which made her anxious. It seemed no one was buying into her ploy. But before she could sit back down in embarrassment, an older attendant on the other side of the room stood up as well.

"Adkin vol suk," he spoke in a raspy voice as he pointed to 4-Below and nodded. "Seni ve snu-snu!"

Apparently, his confirmation of her suggestion was all Numbuh 4-Below needed to rally the crowd to her side.

"Uk! Seni ve snu-snu!"

"Snu-Snu! Snu-Snu!"

Mr. Boss looked rather ruffled as he looked around him, covering his ears as the crowd began chanting. "What the heck is a _snu-snu_?"

"I saw that show too! Uh, I mean," the Professor gulped as he tugged his collar. Mr. Boss wasn't going to like this. "They basically want me to, um, do the wedding in a more…traditional manner. It will make the bonding more holy. Yes, holy is the right word to use. In fact, if I do the wedding that way, it will probably make this union the holiest of holy weddings in the history of holiness! It's that holy."

"How long will this take?"

"…that depends…"

"Ugh!" Mr. Boss grumbled. He did not want to be stuck in this frozen wasteland longer than he had to be, but he also didn't want to risk insulting the families by denying the right to a 'snu-snu' wedding. "Just do it as quick as you can, I got a meeting in Bombay at five!"

The Professor smiled, stretching his arms. "Seni ve SNU-SNU!"

Hoagie slowly got back into his seat as the crowd cheered, obviously excited for something. He looked over to Numbuh 4-Below, curious. "What the heck did you just do?"

"I used an ancient Ubekian stratagem called _Guon na Seni ve Snu Snu_, a phrase in a long forgotten dialect that roughly translates as 'trials of the holy wedding'," she explained. "If anyone attending the wedding believes the couple is not worthy of marriage, they can suggest they go through some of our older religious wedding traditions to be judged by the gods."

"So, what does mean for us?"

"It means I've just bought us some time for your teammates to get ready. The crowd has agreed with my suggestion, now they have to preform the wedding traditions of old."

"Perfect! We're still in this!" Hoagie quickly pulled out his communicator, and contacted his friends. "Hey Numbuh 5, Numbuh 4-Below just bought us some more time. What's your status?"

"_Numbuh 3's torturing two bridesmaids we think we can replace._"

"She's _torturing _them?"

"_Well, not exactly. They were about to rat us out, so Numbuh 3 panicked and started singin' the rainbow monkey theme song for some reason. It's like it's the sound of ultimate suffering for them, or something; they look ready to give us anything we want._"

"Okay…keep up the good work, I guess," Hoagie slowly mumbled when the sounds of terrified screams and Kuki's lovely voice became apparent in the background. He then turned to Numbuh 4-Below. "So what kind of trials do they have to do?"

"It's all pretty standard," she shrugged. "First, the bride and groom must prove they can stand against the blows life will throw at their bond. This is demonstrated by the groom kicking the bride in the shin to see how long she can stand up."

_BAP!_

"OW!"

_BAP!_

"OWWW!"

Hoagie glanced to his watch as as the groom proceeded to hammer Wally's poor leg. The blond was no push-over, being the team's hand-to-hand specialist after all. After ten minutes, the boy somehow managed to keep standing, despite his leg being more bruised than a banana in a boxing match. The record was set at twelve minutes and seventeen seconds when an impatient Mr. Boss tripped Wally up when no one was looking. "Now what?"

"Now, the bride returns the favor to see how long the groom can stand."

Hoagie heard the sound of cracking knuckles, and didn't even need to look up to see Wally's grin.

_BAP!_

_**CRASH!**_

The two operatives looked on amused to see adult helping the groom out of the smoldering pile that used to be Professor Triple Extra Large's podium. "That didn't take long."

Numbuh 4-Below rolled her eyes. "Next, the bride and groom must show their commitment before the current incarnation of _Wel'neda_, the goddess of love whom takes many mortal forms."

The doors of the alter-chamber were thrown open once again as an extravagantly dressed woman was carted into the room on a heavy looking throne. The Ubekian guards struggled under its weight, but continued on to the alter. As they passed, the crowd bowed their heads in a show of immense respect. Numbuh 4-Below bowed her head as well, and forced Hoagie's down when he failed to get with the program.

At the foot of the alter, the guards set the throne down. The woman took a regal stance, her silky robes shimmering in the light. All were transfixed on her as she moved fluidly down the aisle. Even Mr. Boss and Wally, who had no idea what was going on, were in complete of the awe of the woman's beauty.

Hoagie took a peak, and let out a wolfish whistle at the sight of the woman. "That's _Wel'neda_?"

Numbuh 4-Below groaned. "No…"

The woman knelt before Wally and the groom, placing something down on the floor. The woman backed away from the creature, and bowed in a fashion similar to everyone else in the room. Now with her robes out of the way, Hoagie could get a clear view of the goddess everyone was praising.

What he saw was a doe eyed skunk with a bow on its head.

"_That _is _Wel'neda_."

Hoagie gagged a bit at the smell that suddenly hit him square in the face. He covered his nose, and ducked down to avoid the stench at all costs. "Geez Louise! She smells worse than Bradley after he took on the Cheese Shogun's Seven Smelly Samurai Swordsmen!"

"Do not disrespect _Wel'neda_!" Numbuh 4-Below growled, prying Hoagie's hands away from his nose. Such an act was one of great insult. "You must bask in her radiance! Bask, darn you!"

"I'm all for religious freedom, but you people are crazy!" Hoagie cried as he slapped her hands away. Numbuh 4-Below muttered something he couldn't understand, and simply went back to praying. The boy rolled his eyes as he attempted to get into contact with the girls again. "Numbuh 5, they're almost done praying to the stunk god, or whatever. Are you guys ready?"

"_Not yet, baby. We got the dresses, but we jus' ran into some Ubekian royal knights who 'til recently said 'nid'. They're not letting us through. And what the heck does 'nid' mean anyway?_"

"I think it means 'no' or something. And what do you mean 'until recently'?"

"_Now they're sayin' stuff like 'Ekke Ekke Ekke Ekke Ptangya Ziiinng', but that's more than likely because Numbuh 3 keeps kicking them near the waist._"

"Exactly _where _near the waist?"

"_Where do you _think?"

"A lot of places, actually," Hoagie chuckled. "How much longer will you be?"

"_The knights just went down for good. Should only take us a few seconds to get into place. Hey Numbuh 3! Does this dress make me look fat… _"

Hoagie turned the communicator to mute as Abby's voice trailed off. He then noticed Numbuh 4-Below seemed to be finished praying. "So, you all enlightened now?"

The girl only huffed and pointedly turned away from him. "The prayer to _Wel'neda_ was a success. The next trial is the dance of the ancients to appease our ancestor's spirits."

Hoagie leaned back into his seat, content to just sit back and watch until Nigel checked in. "A wedding and show, eh? Should've brought some popcorn."

* * *

"Forget what I said before, I am NOT keeping the dress," Kuki muttered as she and Abby hurried to find the rest of the bridesmaid. The cute girl's hair was done up in a bun, and she grimly poked at the frilly dressed she was forced to wear. "These colors clash!"

"Call the fashion police _after_ we've saved Numbuh 4," Abby sighed as she rushed Kuki into the room. She quickly closed the door, and trotted over to the amassing group of bridesmaids. "Just wear your veil, and don't get chummy with anybody. Once Numbuh 1 gives the signal, we grab the sport and get the heck outta here."

Kuki nodded as she pulled down her veil, her face becoming obscured from view. She stuck close to Abby as they neared the group of bridesmaid, she was a bit put off by how frantic they all seemed to be moving around.

She knew weddings were fun, fantastic, and super duper exciting, but all the girls just seemed a bit _too_ jittery. Even by her standards. "What's all the fuss about? Oh no! I look horrible, don't I? I told you fuchsia wasn't my color!"

"I don't think that's what they're worried about," Abby said as she looked around. What was going on. Before she could even think about, she and Kuki suddenly found themselves being herded along. "Ah!"

"Khea go'po," the voice of the woman in charge spoke. Abby and Kuki clammed, wary of blowing their cover. They played along with whatever the adult was doing, and found themselves being placed into a long, single file line. Once she was satisfied with the placement, the woman smiled and clapped her hands. "Ghuk ini kulini!"

"What's going on?" Kuki asked, confused.

"Numbuh 5 stopped tryin' to make sense of everything ages ago," Abby muttered as she rolled her eyes. She then paused, narrowing her eyes as she heard music starting to play. "The heck is dat noise…"

Kuki looked nervous when all the bridesmaid began lifting their arms. She hesitantly mirrored them, looking to her friend for guidance. Before she could mouth her concern, the bridesmaids began moving along. It almost looked as if they were dancing. This train of thought was confirmed when a large curtain began to rise.

As the curtain rose, Abby and Kuki were greeted to the sight of the crowd in the alter-chamber. Near the back of the room, a small symphony had gathered, and began playing a foreign redefinition of disco music made famous by Van McCoy.

As the music began, the woman in charge of the girls quickly proclaimed, "Alo shalla noa'can ici vo'nin ka'la!"

Within minutes, every single bridesmaid was performing _The Hustle_.

Kuki glanced over towards Abby as they all began stepping back and forth in rotation. "Uh, Numbuh 5?"

Abby felt like she wanted to just die of embarrassment. "Just play along, girl. The sooner we get this over with, the sooner we can forget it happened."

In the crowd, Hoagie's eyes widened as he noted the dancing bridesmaid coming out. "Uh, an explanation would be nice?"

"The woman said, 'They will now perform our peoples' native dance'. It is the dance of the ancients, performed by the bridesmaids of the bridal party," Numbuh 4-Below nodded. "The name is rather long to pronounce –even by my country's standards– but the people of the world have come to call it the 'Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan Hustle." The girl sat a tad straighter, eyes sparkling at the spectacle. "Oh! Watch carefully, this part of the dance implores the gods to grant a favor."

Hoagie raised an eyebrow towards the girl, twiddling his finger at his temple. She stubbornly turned away from him and watched the performance. The nerve of him mocking their scared traditions. It was started to make her wonder why she was even helping them. Their dance was a graceful dance. Her people weren't crazy.

Really. They weren't.

* * *

Way above the wonderfully odd ceremonies taking place in the alter-chamber, a young Nigel Uno was steadily making his way up towards the rooftop of the building. The boy faced the periling heights and bone chilling temperatures head on. Their rescue plan hinged on him getting into position. He would not fail.

His hand gripped a dangling pole, and he heaved as he pulled himself onto it. Once he had a sable foothold, he shimmied across the narrow pole, making doubly sure not to look down. KND Mission Protocol insured a fourteen percent increase in scaling efficiency when one did not look down. Once Nigel reached the wall, he ducked just enough out of eyesight as he prepared to storm the roof.

"Alright," he breathed to himself as he reached for his blaster, "if I know Mr. Boss, he'll have put security up here to cover all his fronts. Clever planning, but he's made one major error: underestimating me." Nigel smirked. He took a deep breath before lunging over the edge. Once he hit the snowy deck, he swung up his blaster to take deadly-aim. "SURPRISE! Wait a minute, where are the guards?"

The child straightened his posture as he walked across the barren rooftop. This was beyond confusing. There wasn't a single ice cream man in sight. That made absolutely no sense at all. He never miscalculated (tonight's former follies notwithstanding) Mr. Boss' strategies. With all that had went on before, there was no way the man would be confident and dim enough to leave the roof completely vulnerable.

Before Nigel could criticize Mr. Boss' methods any further, he stopped once he caught sight of a crumpled note halfway buried by the snow. Mildly curious, he plucked the parchment up from the ground, and quickly skimmed it over for clues.

_:NOTICE TO ICE CREAM MEN SCHEDULED FOR ROOFTOP SHIFT:_

_To any and all ice cream men rescheduled for rooftop guard duty, this notice was left to notify you of an unofficial reassignment. As you all might know, Mr. Boss has triplicated all efforts to buff up security ever since he confirmed KND presence in the compound. He recently ordered a few of us from the fifth and third platoons to guard the rooftops because he thinks they'll most likely try to sneak in from here. But after serious consideration, we have firmly deduced that instead of the cold, lonely, and completely isolated rooftop, the KND operatives will, in fact, try to sneak in through the warm, cozy, and very populated all-you-can-eat wedding buffet in the main lobby._

_Now, we know that's a bit of a stretch in logic, but these kids would actually try and sneak in that way because it would be so obvious, that no one would expect them to. I, personally, have dealt with these brats before, and can attest to their cunning and infiltration skills. Seriously. I have it on good authority that they once got by the Toiletnator by wearing nothing but a "I'm not a KND operative" t-shirt. These are some crafty little buggers._

_In short, please report to the buffet on-the-double. Actually, make that on-the-triple. The way Johnson was knocking back those fancy finger hors d'oeuvres earlier, they'll be gone before the brats can say "I do"._

_PS: If Dave happens to be reading this, then you can ignore the reassignment order and stay on the roof. Why? Because you are a jerk, and really bad at your job. With that in mind, let me just take the time to say what a HORRIBLE sprinkle gunnery chief you are is. How did you even get that rank in the first place? You got some embarrassing photos stashed around somewhere or what? News flash: everyone here hates you. Everyone hates your stupid little jokes, how you think you're so awesome when you're not, and ESPECIALLY how you started ragging on Jenny about how she got some extra flab around the hips. Really? She just had a kid, you insensitive jerk-wad. Besides, if anyone needs to lose some weight, it's you. You do know we only shoot the ice cream, not eat it, right?  
_

_And don't think we don't know about that creepy rainbow monkey fanfiction you keep on your computer. Yeah. We know ALL about that.  
_

"Odd, the rest of the note seems smudged out," Nigel observed as he studied the note. The bottom half of the message was smeared with what seemed to be tear stains. Getting no further use out of the notice, the Brit simply tossed it aside. He asked why there were no guards, and he got his answer. Not wanting to start a bad habit of staring a gift-horse in the mouth, the boy continued on with his mission.

"All I have to do now is find the entrance to the ventilation system," Nigel mused out loud. It was the perfect plan. Find the entryway to the ventilation system on the roof, then crawl through the ducts until he was directly above the alter-chamber. Once there, he could drop the smoke-bomb, then get out with no one being none the wiser. It was such a genius plan. If there was one thing he could count on, it was the good old ventilation system trick–

"Ow!" he suddenly hissed when he stubbed his toe on something. He peered down, ready to glare at whatever brought him pain. However, he blinked as he studied the object in closer detail. In fact, the thing he almost tripped over looked just like…"Is _that _the vent entrance?"

Indeed it was, only to the operative's chagrin, the entry was smaller than he anticipated. Much, much smaller. He would never be able to squeeze through that tiny hole!

"One step forward…" he grumbled, whipping out his communicator. "Numbuh 2, we have a problem."

"_This is Numbuh 4-Below,_" the girl's voice chimed in, "_Numbuh 2 is currently occupied._"

"With what?"

"_After the bridesmaids performed the dance of the ancients, the High Priest performed the final wedding trial by tossing the wedding bouquet into the crowd. It landed on your friend, and he is currently whining about it._"

"_Because that WASN'T a bouquet!_" Hoagie raged I the background. "_That was a dead turkey stuffed with salmon and dandelions!_"

"_I told you, we do things differently. Throwing expensive flowers is just silly._"

"As much as I would _love _to learn more about wedding traditions, I'm stuck up here and could use a bit of guidance."

"_What is wrong?_"

"The ventilation shaft. The entry's too small, I'll never be able to fit inside."

"_Of course you wouldn't. We design our ventilation ducts to be so small that a infant couldn't even get in. If we created huge ones, we might as well put up a sign that says 'Hey! Big obvious secret entrance right here!'. Why? Is that a problem?"_

"We're, eh, just more accustomed to them being a bit more spacious where we're from," Nigel coughed. Fidgeting in his boots, he looked back to the small vent duct again. "This complicates things."

"_Oh no, the wedding trials have finished. We cannot delay them any longer!_"

"_Boss? This is Numbuh 5. Me and Numbuh 3 got a clear shot at the sport. Whatever you're gonna do, you better do it now._"

"Forget this," Nigel grunted as he dug around for the smoke-bomb. He crouched down towards the vent duct and carelessly tore it off its hinges. Once it was open, he dropped the gadget, and it clanked as it rolled down the ducts. He didn't stop there, however, as he simply kept shoving down every spare bomb he had on him.

"If I can't get a clear shot, I simply flood the entire system. The moment you guys see smoke pouring in, grab Numbuh 4 and run like Father's on your heels!" he ordered as he stood. With a final nod, he held up the detonator. His thumb hovered over the switch before he mashed down. "NOW!"

Silence.

"_Um, boss? Where's the smoke?_"

"Wha…wh-why isn't it…" Nigel trailed off as he stared confoundedly at the remote. He don't what possessed him to do so, but he ended up flipping it on its backside to check for any malfunctions. It was around this time that he started to notice felt a lot lighter than what it should be. Slowly, he opened up the battery pack, only to drop it in the snow as he saw it was –

"Empty?" Yes sir. The remote was currently devoid of any battery power what-so-ever. "Th-this is BRAND NEW! It shouldn't be empty!" Something caught his eye in the midst of his raging, and he peered closer to get a good look at some kind of label patched on the inside. "'Warning: Batteries not included.' Not included? _Who does_ _THAT?_ This is inconceivable! Who approved the decision not to include batteries in vital 2x4 technological devices? The idiot who created the Blow-up-the-engines button?"

Fun fact. Two weeks earlier, during which Nigel was on sick leave due to the flu bug going around, Numbuh 362 called an emergency meeting with the sector leaders and numerous 2x4 scientists and experts. There was something of a budget problem, due to Numbuh 10 soaking up all their money for a promotional KND recruiting video that resulted in a massive copyright-infringement lawsuit and a failure to pay several key actors; one of which happened to be Father.

Needless to say, cuts needed to be made, and the 2x4 department was projected to take a big hit. One of the decisions made to save dough was to stop packing batteries in certain devices. Operatives would have to pony up the allowance to go out and buy them themselves. The new process was approved with a 198-197 vote, with the deciding vote belonging to an apathetic operative who would be decommissioned before the new process went into effect anyway.

The brilliant operative who suggested _that_ particular idea was, in fact, the idiot who made the Blow-up-the-engines button. Why he or she is _still_ in the 2x4 Department is a question that continues to allude great minds to this very day.

In his rage, Nigel threw down the useless detonator and stomped upon it with all his hate. "Why. Can't. Anything. Go. AS. _PLANNED!_"

"_Numbuh 1?_"

"Give me ONE second," Nigel seethed, looking all around for the answers to his problems. He didn't know why he didn't anticipate this. Suddenly, his eyes gazed lower. The boy curiously peered over the edge over to roof to catch sight of the parking lot down below. It was at that moment, a crazy notion entered his head. Normally, he wouldn't even consider such an impulse decision.

However, this was far from a normal situation. So impulse was golden at the moment.

"Forget all notion of subtly," he deadpanned as he clicked his heels together. As his jet-boots flickered to life, he sent one last message to his team. "Be on the ready, team. We're going with plan B."

* * *

"Plan B?" Abby whispered harshly into her hidden headset. Noticing the odd stares from the other bridesmaids, she breathed deeply to calm herself down. "Boss, this whole crazy idea _was _plan B."

"_Then consider this plan B and a half. Give me a few minutes._"

"Boss? Boss?" Abby whispered into the headset, becoming more irritated as more radio static answered her. "Nigel, you crazy fool, you better not have lost it."

"Oh no," Kuki gasped as she continued to watch the Professor speak, "I think they're almost done!"

Hoagie nervously twiddled around from his seat. This was getting bad. If he didn't do something now, then is best pal was going to end up on a honeymoon with some booger picking dead-beat husband. Finally fed up with just sitting around, he lowered to the floor, and motioned Numbuh 4-Below to follow. "C'mon, let's go."

Hesitantly, the girl mirrored his movements. The two slowly began crawling under the benches themselves. The quickly and carefully avoided the feet of the guests as they inched closer to the front of the alter-chamber. "What are we doing?"

Hoagie could only shake his head. "You tell me, and we'll both know, sister."

"Tuki go numi," Professor Triple Extra Large soothingly prayed, his mutated, grizzly paws waving around with every word. "Ukeni, opi gol."

Mr. Boss grinned to himself, sending Wally a devilish sideways glance. "Get ready to pucker-up, kid."

Wally made a retching sound in reply. "I hate weddings."

Unknown to those upfront, Hoagie and Numbuh 4-Below were very close to the alter.

"Almost there," Hoagie chanted to himself. Every inch counted as he raced against the invisible clock. "Just got to get a little bit–uh oh."

The reason for the boy suddenly freezing mid-crawl was staring at him cutely in the face. It appeared that the cheery little skunk-goddess thing from before had gotten curious and wandered off on her own. Highly curious of the chubby boy crawling on his hands and knees, she slowly trotted closely to inspect him further.

That was a very bad idea, for every step she took, Hoagie's poor nose got itchier and itchier. His sensitive sinuses were a terrible curse indeed.

"Uh, nice Wel-nedey-god thing," he gulped as she got closer. "Don't come any–Ah, ah, AHHH Ch–" he stopped himself in the nick of time by pinching his nasal passage shut. Once the sensation had passed, he sighed with relief. That was way too–

"AH-CHOO!"

He slowly looked over in horror at Numbuh 4-Below, who was sheepishly rubbing her nose. "Opps."

"AHHH!" a woman above them screamed, having looked down for the cause of the noise. "ICI-NOJ LIK!"

There was a sudden wave of panic surging throughout the chamber as the two kids were exposed. Before any adult could make a grab for them, they hurried out into the open aisle. They remained out of reach of venturous hands, but strayed into direct sight of every person attending the wedding. Back the the alter, there were varying expressions. Abby and Kuki conveyed one of annoyance, Wally showed a look of confusion, Professor Triple Extra Large displayed no emotion, as he was still praying, somehow unaware of everything going on. And Mr. Boss…

…well, there wasn't a word that quite accurately summarized his current state of furry and embarrassment.

"Why you sneaky little Kids Next Door brats!" he grounded out, his presence suddenly becoming more looming and intimidating. "I shoulda known you'd find a way to weasel in here and ruin my special day!"

Wally, whom looked positively ecstatic that his friends had come to rescue him, suddenly frowned up to the adult villain. "YOUR special day?"

"Uh, w-why yes, Princess Yal'see!" Mr. Boss suddenly covered. He began digging around in his pockets for something to shut Wally up before he ran his mouth some more and ruined everything. "You can have all the candy you want!"

"I don't want any–UMMF!" Wally's response became muffled as the adult stuffed a handful of peppermints in his mouth. "MMMFFF! UMMMMF!"

Mr. Boss whipped his face before turning his ire back and the children. "Now, for you two!"

"Oh! Um, would ya look at that, Numbuh 4-Below? You were right!" Hoagie suddenly tried to explain amidst the threatening gazes being sent his way. "This isn't the bathroom! Duh!" Anxious to get out from under the spotlight, the girl quickly nodded along with Hoagie's fib as they started backing towards the exit. "Well, we can clearly see you're busy with this wedding and all, sooo how 'bout we just hit the can and–"

"GUARDS!"

"Uh oh," Hoagie muttered as the Ubekian soldiers in the room began closing in. Thinking fast, he quickly reached for the first thing he could get his mitts on. "S-Stand back! O-Or else I do something drastic!"

The crowd morphed to a combined expression of panic once they registered what Hoagie held in his hands. "Ul'ko _Wel'neda!_"

"That's right! I've got _Wel'neda_?" he blinked, realizing he had somehow picked up the skunk. Shaking his head, he decided to use it to his advantage. "I mean, yeah! I have your god! So you better put those pointy looking sticks down, see?"

The guards lowered their weapons without argument and even began giving Hoagie some space. He grinned. This was working even better than he could have predicted.

"Now no sudden movements," he ordered, holding up the skunk threatening, "or the goddess of love here ain't gonna be feelin' so lovely after I'm done with her!"

"I know we're kind of backed into a corner right now," Numbuh 4-Below piped in,"but could you please tone down with the threats? She's only the physical manifestation of our religion, after all."

"Did you say, '_Wel'neda'_?" Kuki suddenly spoke out, drawing all attention from the room. Abby could only watch in stunned silence as the girl blew their cover. "Numbuh 2, ask her if she's related to Bradley!"

"W-What the?" Mr. Boss spluttered, almost losing hold of his cigar. "They're comin' out of the wood-works!"

"Enough!" Hoagie yelled as he and 4-Below quickly moved to the girls' sides. Now with all of them together, he continued to hold his ground with the skunk. "I mean it! It may look bad, but we have a valid reason for being here. We're only here to steal the bride and stop this wedding that would bring peace between two families!"

Abby groaned. "Not helping."

"You know what I mean," he sighed. "So you all better listen up, or I'll commit some serious acts of blasphemy!"

Wel'neda, who had decided she had been manhandled enough this evening, glared back at the boy holding her, and lifted her tail.

_HISSSSS!_

"Eww!" Hoagie yelped, dropping the skunk as her nasty stench clouded his senses. "Grooooooooss!"

"Quick! Move in now, you idiots!"

Abby tensed as the guards surrounded them, even more angry than before. "Nice job losing our only bargaining chip."

Hoagie simply ignored her to deal with his current plight. "I think some of it got in my mouth…"

"So much for that," Mr. Boss smiled as the Ubekian royal guard kept their spears trained on the children. "You kiddies think you could get the drop on me? Ha! I've been at this a lot longer than you. This wedding is happening, whether you like it or not. If you wanted front rows seats, you shoulda told me. Could've gotten you some nice chains to go with your outfits. Heh heh heh."

Kuki sniffled as she glanced towards Wally. "We tried, Numbuh 4…"

Wally clenched his fists as he witnessed his friends' dilemma. "No way. If you guys are going down, then I'm goin' with ya."

Mr. Boss frowned. "I think you need more candy."

"No I–UMMF!"

The boy was quickly silenced with another round of peppermint. Before he could object any further, Mr. Boss gripped his shoulder, and kept him contained so the Professor could finally finish the vows. "Get this over with so I can get the Tipuans to sign the contract."

"Olka no'we, okla no'ga," the Professor prayed as he opened his eyes. When he finally took notice of his surroundings, he smiled as he noticed the children of Sector V. "Oh, hello kids. I didn't know you were invited. Well, since I doubt you understand Ubekian, I'll translate for you. Basically, I was at the obligatory part where I ask 'If anyone has any reason these two should not be wed, speak now, or forever hold your piece' yadda yadda. It's not officially part of Ubekian weddings, but I like to add my own little touch," he smiled proudly. "So anyone? We'll take any reason from anyone. Anyone! Oh, except you, kids. You're about to be arrested and promptly executed. But anyone else?"

Wally looked about ready to blow his cover and speak up, but it only took Mr. Boss threateningly waving another handful of candy in the air to shut him up.

"Really? No one? This is the perfect time for someone to swoop in and stop this whole thing," the Professor pressed. When no one spoke up, he seemed a tad bit disappointed. "You people are no fun. Well, since no one is gonna speak up, I guess I can now–"

The doors suddenly slammed open, a panicked looking Prince Yul'sha barging in. "CIMI-CICO!"

The Professor smiled. "Ah, I love cliches."

Mr. Boss growled. "_Why_ did I hire you again?"

"Cimi-cico gol'umi!" Prince Yul'sha continued on, waving his hands in the air wildly. "GOL'UMI!"

Hoagie rolled his eyes before looking expectantly at Numbuh 4-Below. "Okay, I'll bite. What is saying?"

The girl seemed confused. "He says the rebels are attacking?"

"Rebels? What rebels?"

Suddenly, the pane windows of the alter-chamber exploded. They rained down shards of expensive glass as dozens of bodies swung in from the outside. As they landed in the room, the children noticed these men and woman of various age were dressed in crimson robes and face shrouds that only revealed their spirited eyes. They wielded swords, and spun spears through the air as they stood; their bodies pensive and ready to attack at any moment.

Kuki saw the unfamiliar men and women burst in and smiled. "Maybe these guys can tell us."

At the doors, Yul'sha found himself being pushed aside as another party of intruders waltzed into the chamber. At the front was a boy probably no older than the kids themselves. His eyes were ablaze with a passion never before seen, and he grinned wickedly as he pointed the tip of his sword towards Wally.

"Yal'see ka'nij," he spoke in a nasally voice. While he had everyone's undivided attention, Yul'sha quietly slipped away unnoticed. "Hu'nomora, nidi kukoa loju'vin!" He then aimed his weapon to the heavens, and let out a furious battle cry. "ALA NAS SU!"

"ALA NAS SU!" the intruders yelled in reply. Without warning, they suddenly began attacking the royal Ubekian guards and ice cream men present in the room. Within a few short minutes, complete chaos had erupted as everyone was either fighting, or running around like headless chickens at a slaughter.

At the alter, the children could only guess as to what was happening. "Who the heck are these guys?"

"They are the Unruly Rebels From The Separatist State," Numbuh 4-Below filled in as she ducked. "They seceded from our country in order to form their own."

"Why? It wasn't crazy enough here?"

"No, they believe we are worshiping the wrong form of _Wel'neda_, and that she actuallytook the form of a platypus this cycle, and that's just stupid."

Abby jumped out of the way of a rebel and royal guard getting into a heavy altercation. "That doesn't explain why they suddenly decided to crash the wedding!"

"The small boy leading them is Hob'en Hump-Nun, the rebel leader's son. He commands a legion of his father's loyal foot-soldiers," 4-Below frowned. "Given that he's the one leading this odd surprise attack, I cannot say I am shocked."

"Why's dat?"

"He's Princess Yal'see's ex-boyfriend. Her extremely jealous, and cannot-take-a-hint ex-boyfriend."

Kuki cooed. "So he's here to stop Yal'see's wedding? That would be so romantic if it wasn't completely annoying us right now."

Hoagie rubbed his chin as he connected the dots. "But wait, Numbuh 4 is dressed up as Yal'see. The real one is back in the RV. That means–"

"GUYS!" Shocked, the four of them turned to see Hob'en Hump-Nun carting Wally over his shoulder. The poor blond was fighting off the young rebel's attempts to woo him as he 'rescued' him. "This had bettah not be apart of the rescue plan!"

"Oh great," Hoagie sighed. "We gotta save him!"

"Oh no you don't!" Mr. Boss said as he stopped in front of the boy. He pushed the boy down, and snapped his fingers. Within seconds, the nearest ice cream men who weren't busy fighting off the rebel offense came to his aid. "This doesn't change a thing! You brats are not ruining this wedding."

"Are you nuts?" Abby sneered. "Can you not see that this place is under attack? The wedding is over!"

"Not until I say it is!" Mr. Boss growled as he pulled the wedding contract from his pocket. "I've already gotten the Kola'tas to sign this, and as long as I get the Professor here to make the two brats say 'I do', then the Tipuans are forced to sign this thing by Ubekian law; no matter WHAT the circumstances!"

Hoagie was astounded by the lengths the man was willing to go to to gain control of the Tipuan trading empire. "You are seven flavors of nutso, my friend. There's no way you can possibly pull this off, and you know it!"

"I can try," Mr. Boss crackled, a wicked gleam in his eye. "Besides, the worst you've idiots have done is just delayed everything. Once this wears off and I have you brats tied up, I can just blame the whole thing on you. You've basically did it all for me! The only real work I'd have to do is make sure you stay put to take the fall and find the real princess, but I bet you kids have the real one stashed around close by; my boys here are all too willing to help out with the former problem I mentioned," he grinned, motioning to his hired help. "No matter what happens today, I'll still win."

The children geared up for a fight as the men drew closer. Things looked terribly grim. But then everything didn't seem so grim when the faint jingle of an ice cream truck was heard in the distance. Curious, Mr. Boss turned around, and noticed two lights gleaming in on the only window that hadn't been destroyed. As the two orbs of light grew bigger and bigger, it was only then did the adult recognized them as headlights.

Numbuh 4-Below narrowed her eyes in suspicion. "Is that a–"

"ICE CREAM TRUCK!" Mr. Boss screamed as he and his men scrambled to get out of the way. Sector V was a tad quicker than the slow adults, and they reacted accordingly. For the poor squad of Ice Cream Men and Mr. Boss, they found themselves flying in all sorts of directions as a wild ice cream truck suddenly crashed through the wall. Mr. Boss went soaring through the air due to the impact, losing grip of his cherished marriage contract as he took a short flight.

Sector V gathered around the truck once the dust settled. Despite its speed and velocity, the truck only made it about halfway through the wall. Numbuh 4-Below almost felt like boasting about the strength of Ubekian architecture, but she supposed now wasn't the time. Before anyone could really make an official comment, a body stumbled out of the driver's seat.

Nigel felt the whole world spinning as he wobbled to and fro, lucky, before he could hit the ground, Abby and Kuki caught him by his arms. As the girls helped lift him back up, he coughed as he said, "_That_…was plan B and a half. Works every time."

"Hate to see what plan C was," Abby chuckled. She tossed a look towards the smoking wreckage of the ice cream trucked and whistled. "An ice cream truck? Really?"

"It worked with the Delightfuls. Besides, the keys were still in the ignition. It was practically begging to be stolen," he grumbled as he stood up himself. As he adjusted his sunglasses, he finally took note of the anarchy around him. "What in blazes is going on?"

"The guys in red are rebels who just decided to randomly attack, their leader is one of Yal'see's former flings, said fling is currently trying to elope with Numbuh 4, there's a skunk god running around here somewhere, and everyone else is pretty much trying to kill each other," Hoagie nonchalantly rattled off. "That's abridged version, at least."

"I go dark for five minutes and _this_ happens?"

"Why are you all standing here? Go!"

They all turned to the voice, and all gasped in shock. "Numbuh Infinity? How did you get out of the trunk?"

The boy hopped across the rows of benches, narrowly avoiding rebels and guards alike. As he landed in front of the group, his arm snapped back to shoot down an incoming ice cream man as he conversed with Nigel. "I said open sesame. Now get a move on!"

"Wait," Abby clued in, "_you _did this?"

"Really? Are you all _that_ daft?" Infinity gawked. "Rebels are attacking. Perfect cover! Perfect people to blame EVERYTHING on once the smoke clears! I've all but shoved the answers in your face! Now are you going to stand around and spout out some more exposition, or are you going to save your stupid teammate while you have the chance?"

The children shared a collective blink before the weight of the entire situation finally dawned on them. Nigel produced an awkward cough while the rest of his team shuffled around, embarrassed. "Uh, thank you, Numbuh Infinity. I think." The boy then shook his head, then moved to rally his team. "Come on, team. Let's go!"

The diplomat rolled his eyes as he turned back to the fray. Just like old times, just him, his fists, and a laser gun. But as he took aim, he noticed something floating down in front of him. Curious, he reached out for the parchment of paper, and quickly skimmed it over. His eyes bulged from behind his shades as he realized what he held.

"This...changes everything," he uttered in awe. His mind instantly plotting a new course, and he flipped open his communicator. "Yul'sha, it's Infinity."

"_I am nearly to the RV. I will be able to get my sister out during the chaos._"

"Not yet! The plan's changed."

"_WHAT? You DARE renege on our deal?_"

"Only when a better one has presented itself. With this piece of paper I've just acquired, we have all we need to expose Mr. Boss."

"_What could you possibly have that-wait, you mean the-_"

"Yes," Infinity finished for him, looking at the document once more. "I'm sure of it. We only get one shot at this."

"_This had better work. But we're going to make some new arrangements once this is over._"

"End transmission," Infinity ended the call, not entirely comfortable with Yul'sha's tone of voice. He then turned back to the retreating group of kids. He needed at least one of them for this ploy to worl.

Abby, Kuki, and Hoagie followed Nigel's lead without question as they all made a beeline for the courtyard. Numbuh 4-Below was about to trail after them, but was stopped when Infinity grabbed her shoulder.

"Not you," he said as he turned her around. "First of all, Numbuh 4-Below, I apologize if I insulted your people's language any during the course of this mission. I'm well aware I may have made one or two mistakes."

The girl shifted her eyes awkwardly. "Uh…uk."

Infinity simply nodded. "Glad we sorted that out. Now, I need you for something else to make sure we all don't end up imprisoned after this. Make your way back outside, and find Prince Yul'sha. Once you two meet up, head back to the RV. There's a very important pick-up you have to make…"


	6. Chapter 6

_**My Big Fat Ubekian Wedding**_

_**(Part 3: The Reprise)**_

* * *

Out in the courtyard, the air of the Ubekian evening flowed normally through the floral arrangement and garden pieces. Not a stir of excitement could be found. The marble fountain in the center of area had even somehow managed to also remained untouched from the chaotic goings on of the wedding reception.

However, this portrait of peace would soon be tarnished, for Sector V minus one blond Aussie had finally made it outside.

"Numbuh 4!" Kuki was the first to shout. The four of them looked all around the courtyard, but not a trace of the boy could be found. Worried, they began to step off the porch to begin a more invested scout attempt. "Wally, answer me! Are you okay, and more importantly, still single?"

"Oi."

They jumped at the noise, then turned to the left to see Wally calmly leaning against a cherry blossom tree. At his feet were his wig, and the form of Hob'en Hump-Nun, whom was now sporting a brand new black eye. Apparently, the small rebel had lowered his guard, clearly not expecting his beloved and fragile Yal'see to be such a brute underneath the dress.

Wally was in the process of packing the perfect snowball in his hands as his friends gathered round. "Sheesh, you lot took ya time, didn't ya? I've made, like, seven of these things waitin' for you guys to get 'ere."

"Oh, you're okay!" Kuki laughed, picking the boy up into a bone crushing hug. "I thought that rebel had taken you on a honeymoon and we would never see you again!"

"Okay, okay! Enough of the mushy stuff. I was in a wedding, for Pete's sake!" Wally whined as he weakly struggled against Kuki's hold. However, he never fully backed away until she was good and ready to let him go. "And that guy is a pansy. I couldn't understand half of the crud he was talkin' about, but I know it all girly and sissy. Yuck!"

As he stepped forward, Nigel bowed his head in shame. "I'm sorry, Numbuh 4. This is my fault. I was desperate, and talked you into going along with this ridiculous plan."

"Yea. Ya did," Wally frowned. However, his face softened a bit, and he lightly bopped the bald boy in the arm. "But don't go beating ya'self up like a crybaby, Numbuh 1. How the heck were you supposed ta know this all would be some trap by Mr. Boss?"

"I _should _have. None of this would of happened if I had prepared better."

"But it did happen," Abby softly said as she placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. "But we manned up, kicked butt, and got Numbuh 4 back. That's all that matters, baby."

"I hear that, sister! Good to have ya back, pal," Hoagie warmly laughed as he swung an arm around the blond's neck. "I'll admit, I was worried you'd blow your cover. Cleaning up for big formal things isn't your style. Luckily, I see that you've managed to properly a-_dress_ the situation! Ha!"

"Right, keep pointing out my dress," Wally grumbled, crossing his arms. "Because that's _never_ going to get old."

"It's not old, it's traditional," Hoagie continued to josh. "Why, I'd say it's even _made of honor_!"

"Alright, Numbuh 2," Nigel sighed, "I think you're getting carried away with this."

"As long as no one carries Numbuh 4 over the threshold, we're good, chief," Hoagie hooted on, nearly laughing himself to tears. "Oh man, I have so many more, but I can't remember 'em. Wait wait, one more! Okay, what do you call it when a blond, a couple of kids, and a priest attend a wedding at the same time?"

"A chance to get all the ice cream I need for my invention!"

"No, that's not even close–AH!" Hoagie yelped as he was pushed aside.

"Oh drat," Professor Triple Extra Large cursed. He then shrugged, then jerked Wally up by his collar. In one hand, he held the blond operative, and in the other, the dazed heir of the Kola'ta family. "I was never good at getting punchlines."

"Professor!" Nigel acknowledged, his team prepping their weapons in response. "What are you doing?"

"Finishing the wedding," he explained. "Ubekian law states that as long as it's done in front of witnesses, then the union is official! Even though none of you want it to happen, you still count as witnesses!"

"We'll never recognize it as a wholesome union!"

"It's not _that _type of wedding, don't get all political." The Professor rolled his eyes. "Now, does anyone have any reasons as to why these two should not be wed? Oh wait, I've already done that. What I mean to say is, I now pronounce these two husband and–"

"Actually," Nigel smirked, "I DO have something to say!" In response, the boy raised up his trusty S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R, and fired the weapon off right in the Professor's face, point blank. The action took the High Priest by surprise, and caused him to drop Wally and the Kola'ta heir. As the two veered off in different directions, the Professor stumbled around blinded.

Hoagie quickly ran behind the adult, and stuck his leg out to trip him up. "Me Two!"

The Professor careened back, hitting the ground with a dull thud. He groaned as he whipped the snow out of his eyes, but then looked curiously to his left. There, he saw Kuki cheerfully making a snow angel. When she noticed him staring at her, she smiled.

"Me Three!" Without warning, she hopped up, then stomped squarely down on the Professor's gut. He heaved as he felt the air rush out of him, and to add further insult to injury, Kuki blew the balding mad scientist a good ol' raspberry. Angered, he swiped one of his claws at the girl, but she only giggled as she leapt out of the way. Enraged, the Professor got to his feet. He grabbed the nearest rock he could find, and reared his arm back to throw it at the girl.

However, the moment he tried to swing his arm around, he found he couldn't. Something, or someone, was holding it back. When he tried to pull against the resistance, he squealed in pain when the person twisted his wrist painfully. With a his expression laden with pain, Triple Extra Large looked back to see Wally smirking as the boy held his entire fur covered arm in his grasp.

"Me Four," Wally darkly chuckled. His other arm gripped hold of the Professor, and then he grunted as he used his might to lift the madman and bring his entire body into a full swing. After a series of harsh rotations, the boy tossed the adult away as if he was nothing, and simply dusted off his hands as he sat back and enjoyed the fruits of his labor.

Abby calmly studied her watch as she waited for the Professor to land. The girl was the epitome of suave and calm as she leaned against a stray tree in the courtyard. After a few seconds, she lifted the rim of her hat to look up and see the Professor tumbling down. Before he could stop himself, the adult's entire face met the harsh bark of the tree with a loud rattle. His moans of pain echoed throughout the courtyard as his body slid down into the ground.

The girl glanced down at the man directly under the tree, then up into the tree's branches itself. Smirking, Abby gave the tree one final light tap with the heel of her foot. The tree rumbled a bit, before dumping a whole heap of snow on the Professor, effectively burying him under it. "Me Five. Heh heh."

"Well," Wally proudly chuckled as he walked back to the group. "That takes care of–OH COME ON!" The boy yelled as he found himself being grabbed and carried away against his will. Again. This time by Hob'en Hump-Nun, who had just now decided to return to the land of the waking.

The rebel leader swung to the rooftop of the building, holding Wally in his grasp as his prize. Clearly the black eye was effecting his eye-sight. "Yoi'po kiau'la mansj'o utio likjo! HA HA!"

Nigel just slumped. "Doesn't ANYONE just stay down anymore?"

"Oh for the love of…" Kuki moaned. Suddenly, her face went to an emotionless blank as she moved into action. She snatched the S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R from Nigel's hands, and ignored his protests as she broke out into a sprint towards the fountain. With amazing athletic ability they didn't know she had, Kuki leapt up the three tier platform that served as the fountain's center piece.

Once at the top, Kuki jumped for a hanging flagpole, and kicked her body forward to build momentum. She let go, bringing herself into a forward, upward somersault. She poised her body in mid-air, and landed on the tiled rooftop of the building without so much as a clatter. She turned towards the rebel boy, who stood in stunned awe of her performance, and crouched low as she ran to him.

When she neared him, Hob'en Hump-Nun snapped out of his daze. He positioned Wally as a shield, and tried to unsheathe his sword. But his fumble would be all Kuki needed. Without effort, she ducked and went into a leg-sweep, kicking both Wally and Hob'en into the air. Kuki held out one arm to catch Wally, and the other holding the S.P.L.A.N.K.E.R reached for the sky. The girl didn't even look up as she fired the weapon, the splintered plank meeting Hob'en's face as it fell towards it.

"Whoa," Wally gasped as Kuki carried him down bridal style. Upon realizing his butt had just been rescued by a girl, she suddenly found his cheeks reddening a bit. "Uh, no one else besides the guys has ta know about this? Right?"

Kuki showed her first sign of emotion by smiling innocently at him. "I don't knoooow. Can I get all your TV time this week to watch the Rainbow Monkey Marathon?"

Wally's eyes widened before narrowing in contempt. "Clever girl."

As the children greeted their friends, hopefully for good this time, a battle haggled Mr. Boss finally managed to stagger out into the courtyard.

Everything was a complete disaster. His ice cream men had been overrun by the rebels, and the royal Ubekian guards were too busy pushing the intruders out to even lift a finger to help them. It was like they had forgotten there was a wedding going on. But of course, that really didn't matter anymore. As much as he tried to deny it, the reception had been canceled. Not to mention he lost track of the marriage contract. There was no telling how much losing that single slip of paper was going to bite him in the butt.

His last hopes on really salvaging anything rested on the Professor managing to pull off a miracle and complete the ceremony. Once he caught sight of the crumpled body of the High Priest himself under a massive pile of snow, Mr. Boss could only grunt. Honestly, that was just about what he expected to happen.

And there Sector V was. Laughing it up and ready to go home. The brats didn't even have the courtesy to at least recognize he was standing a few feet from them! Some arch-enemies they were. They were just the worse.

Yet here they were: victorious again while his perfect business plan to steal the Tipuan Ice Cream Trading empire right from under their noses was in shambles. And to top it all off, his best suit was trashed and he lost the cookies his wife had packed for him.

This day was the worst day ever.

"This has been just _perfect_," he sarcastically grumbled. The five children noticed him, and glared as he continued his line of thought. "The kind of day where everything just goes wrong."

"It's over. You've lost control," Nigel proclaimed, he and his team taking aim at the adult. "Surrender now. You might get parole."

"I may not win," he suddenly grinning, pulling something out of his pocket and quickly tossing it at them. "But you brats won't be standing long!"

Abby's eyes widened as she recognized the weapon that landed at their feet. "A C.R.E.A.M.I.E grenade? Where did he get dat?"

Wally suddenly looked sheepish. "Yeah. I kinda hid one under the dress. Didn't think anyone would notice…"

"ENOUGH OF THIS!" A voice roared from behind. Sector V turned to see the Professor had risen. His chest heaved with every breath, and his eyes were wild. "I will finish this wedding. I WILL! It is my duty as a questionably insane High Priest! I'll finish this ceremony with my _bear_ hands!"

"Ha! Bear hands!" Hoagie suddenly exploded, grinning as he pointed towards the Professor's mutated grizzly hands. "I get it!"

"And you know what you get, Professor?" Nigel innocently asked, before shoving something in the man's hands. "This."

"Oh, why thank you!" he smiled as he took the item. Suddenly, the children bolted, and the Professor finally realized what he was holding. "Aw, popsicles."

_BOOOO-SSSSSSSSLUSH!_

"KULAKIN!" a royal Ubekian guard shouted in the aftermath of the explosion. His eyes widened at what he saw as he entered the courtyard. Ice cream was everywhere. Near the far back, blown and encased to the wall in a sheet of frozen sherbert was what looked like the form of a man-grizzly bear hybrid. Near the opposite exit to the courtyard, was the businessman representing the Kola'tas, and in the center of the courtyard trying to gather their wits were five children. However, once he recognized four of them from back inside in the alter-chamber, he swung up his cross-bow as a warning. "KU GAH NOS!"

"Uh, t-thank goodness!" Mr. Boss suddenly cheered, making a last ditch effort to save his hide. As more and more royal guards poured into the courtyard, he felt his confidence surge. "These are the brats who tried to ruin the wedding! Arrest them!"

Wally sneered at the man, but grimaced when a group of guards took aim at him. "What's going on?"

Nigel gulped, his friends amassing behind him. "The rebels must have been suppressed. We took too long."

"See!" Mr. Boss caught Nigel's words, and attempted to twist them against him. "He admits it!"

"Silence!" The leader of the royal guard shouted. Upon seeing the businessman and children only spoke English, he adjusted his language accordingly. He paused a moment to remember his teachings, then spoke slowly and carefully. "Kola'ta businessman. Who are children?"

Mr. Boss grinned. "Terrorists!"

"WHAT? No we're not!"

"SILENCE!" the guard demanded once more. "Terrorists? They are behind attack?"

"Yes they are!" Mr. Boss was simply loving this. Finally, things were looking up. "Don't you remember? They crashed the wedding earlier! These brats will do anything to stop peace from coming between the Kola'tas and Tipuans." He then pointed towards Wally, who was now distinguishable from Yal'see. "They even switched the real Princess to dupe us!"

Abby nervously glanced around, frightened of how the guards were being so easily swayed by Mr. Boss. "This ain't looking good."

"J-Just wait a minute!" Nigel tried to intervene, but the guards just weren't having it. He yelped when one fired an arrow near his foot in warning. "HEY! Let me explain! Numbuh 4 did dress up as Yal'see, but it was to stop Mr. Boss! He's trying to trick you all!"

"Trick them? That's rich," he didn't even give Nigel a chance to present any evidence. The faster he got the brats convicted, the faster he could get back to fashioning together another contract. "The rebels attacked the moment we found them out. It's obvious! They kidnapped the Princess, and worked with the rebels to stop the wedding!"

"No."

A new voice startled the already tense crowd. Everyone turned to the western entrance to see none other than Prince Yul'sha with a firm, and confident Numbuh Infinity at his side. The Prince's eyes narrowed, and his finger was like a dagger as he singled out Mr. Boss. "The true culprit is none other than Mr. Boss himself. He is the real deceiver!"

"N-No I'm not!" Mr. Boss denied. "You can't believe this punk! He's been doing everything he can to stop the wedding! He's probably in on this whole thing too!"

"Hush, businessman," the royal guard growled. Mr. Boss seemed offended, but knew running his mouth would only lose the last bits of good will he had. With him silenced, the guard turned to Yul'sha."Explain, Yul'sha. Who are the child terrorists?"

"We are not terrorists," Numbuh Infinity took over, "we are the Kids Next Door. We have an established treaty with the Tipuan family through Third-Born Princess Yal'see herself. We are here to honor that treaty by protecting the Princess and her family from a grave threat."

"What threat do you speak of?"

"A threat planned by the rebels, and this fine specimen of slime here," Infinity clarified as he nonchalantly motioned to the fuming Mr. Boss. "Not too long ago, the Kids Next Door uncovered a conspiracy against the Tipuans. Working with the rebels, Mr. Boss constructed a marriage contract between the Tipuans and Kola'tas. A fine print overlooked by the lawyers states that once Yal'see is married to the Kola'ta heir, the rights of the Tipuan empire would be handed over to the Kola'tas. The Kola'tas are nothing more than Mr. Boss' puppets now. They would have handed the empire over into rebel hands."

A small murmur began around the courtyard. The captain of the guard noticed how anxious Mr. Boss seemed to be getting, but said nothing of it. "Why not inform us of this threat?"

"They did. They informed…me," Yul'sha stated. He shared a glance with Infinity, and when the boy nodded, he continued. "None of you believed me of the conspiracy, so I worked with the Kids Next Door to expose it. I took every precaution, such as having them replace Yal'see with a fake in the case the wedding could not be stopped in time."

"You forget that we did not believe you because you had no evidence, Yul'sha."

"Yeah!" Mr. Boss was all too happy to jump in. "Got anything to back up all that talk?"

Infinity then gave a ghost of a smile as he passed along a familiar looking sheet of paper to the captain. "I believe Mr. Boss dropped this. A copy of the marriage contract. Pay very close attention to sub-section b-7."

Mr. Boss panicked. How did the brat get his hands on that? He lost it!…"I lost it when that Ice Cream Truck crashed the place!"

Nigel puffed up his chest pridefully. "Plan B and a half works like a charm, every time."

The guard's eyes narrowed as he read the contract, nearly wanting to shred it in two at what he discovered. "Filthy dogs!" He then turned to Mr. Boss, his men beginning to switch their targets. "You attempted to deceive us!"

"That thing is forged!" Mr. Boss proclaimed, feeling like a mouse staring down a hungry feline. "That thing is a fake! They still haven't proved anything. Like–like the princess! If they replaced her, then where's the real one?"

"Yao ku!"

Mr. Boss knew he was doomed the moment he heard that, even though he couldn't understand the language. There, stepping in from behind Yul'sha, was that other operative. 4-Below something, wasn't it? But she didn't really matter all that much.

It was the Princess, Yal'see, at her side who held everyone's attention.

"Yal'see!" the captain smiled, rushing up to her to insure her safety. He noted her dress, and how it seemed it had been frozen lately. "Huk iou muo kal?"

"Juki lopu has," she grumbled, picking bits of ice cream out of her hair. She then noticed Sector V, and frowned. "Hul bo huki!"

Nigel took his chance and leaned towards Infinity, who had joined them near the center of the chaos. "What exactly is going on? Where did the rebels really come from?"

The diplomat shook a bit. "Yul'sha had them on stand-by as a last ditch effort to stop the wedding. We originally called them in to provide you with cover, but I after I found the marriage contract, we took a gamble, and now we're trying to use them to make it seem like they were working with Mr. Boss to take over the Tipuan empire, and take all the blame for this folly off of us."

"You had all this planned?"

"No, but it seems we've gotten a break and everything had fallen into place to set this up. Now our hopes rides on Yal'see and Yul'sha keeping their end of the deal and clearing our names."

Kuki fidgeted. "And if they don't?"

"Chopping block."

"Yal'see," the captain spoke, focusing his stare on Sector V. "Kids Next Door, hul'our muli kad?"

Yal'see's frown deepened as she looked at the six. They had caused so much trouble for her. Heck, they even put her in the coma. But she then looked over to Numbuh 4-Below. The girl said nothing. She would never demand anything of her princess, but there was a certain pleading sparkle in her eye. She then looked up to her brother for guidance. Yul'sha gave a hard stare the children, but said nothing. It was clear he was leaving their fate up to her.

She immediately decided he was only doing that because he knew how much it irked her. Yal'see sighed, analyzing the group once more.

After a few agonizing minutes, she shrugged. "Kids Next Door, uki hul'our muli kad."

The captain nodded, signaling his guards. "Take bad businessman!"

"What!" Mr. Boss yelped as he suddenly found himself being hauled away. "What did she say?"

"The princess cleared our names," Infinity breathed, hardly believing it himself. "It worked! We got off Scott-free!"

Sector V cheered, Numbuh 4 smirking at Mr. Boss. "Enjoy prison, loser!"

"Wait! I have a High Priest to back me up!" Mr. Boss shouted. "Professor! A little help!"

Professor Triple Extra Large would have responded under normal circumstances, but at the moment, he was frozen to the wall. More than likely, he was suffering his own Brain Freeze Coma.

"Darn it. Last time I ever act on impulse."

Hoagie chuckled. "Man, some people ought to really check their targets." His little jib at the adult was met with a cold reception, with everyone suddenly glaring at him. "What?"

* * *

After what had seemed like a never ending cavalcade of anarchy, the Tipuan compound had returned to its former, peaceful glory. There was still lingering damage from the rebel attack, and the animosity between a sect of rival families was more present than ever, but at for now, the state of things had dwindled down into what everyone could agree was 'normal'. As normal as anything ever is in a place as exotic as Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan.

Back outside the compound, the reunited Sector V grimly watched as the royal guards carted away a horde of prisoners. The chain gang consisted of major rebel leaders in the assault, including Hob'en Hump-Nun, and a weary and defeated Mr. Boss. As he was dragged by the kids, he sneered, before a guard pushed him along, leading him and his brothers and sisters in binds to a heavily fortified horse mounted carriage.

Abby shook her head. Even though the man was being taken away to prison, she knew he would probably be back to annoy them within a couple of months. "So what's gonna happen to Mr. Boss?"

Nigel frowned as he explained. "As an enemy of the Kids Next Door, he's our responsibility. Numbuh Infinity will be handling negotiating a prison transfer to the Arctic Base as soon as possible. Given the charges he's facing here, it would be impossible if we didn't have the Tipuans to back us up. They have major sway here, and it's their way of showing 'thanks' for us solving this little problem for them."

"Probably jus' wanna push him off on us so we can get him outta their hair.," Wally grunted, not entirely pleased at how the villain's punishment was being laid out. "It ain't fair. I get threatened to have my head busted open like a watermelon, and he just has to sit in a dingy little cell until he sucks up to Numbuh 86."

"We'd be stooping to his level if we just left him here to rot," Nigel said, although the line sounded tired and rehearsed, even for him. "Besides, orders are orders."

Hoagie rubbed at his nose as he took in the events. "What about the Professor?"

"He's being treated for his Brain Freeze Coma. Since Numbuh Infinity didn't bother to group him in with Mr. Boss' lot, and the fact he's somehow still a highly respected High Priest in this country, they're going to just detain him for a while until he's recovered."

"They can keep him. The guy's nuttier than a peanut butter and jelly sandwich without the jelly!" The three could only find themselves agreeing with Wally's rather accurate statement.

"Hey guys!" The children turned towards Kuki's voice, and watched as the girl skipped up to them with two guests in tow. "The Prince and Princess want to say goodbye!"

Nigel stood a bit straighter as he met Prince Yul'sha's gaze. "Yul'sha. I suppose I owe you an apology."

The teenager folded his arms and held a very expectant expression. "Yes. I suppose you do."

The bald boy bit back a scoff, before sucking it up and sighing. "I was wrong to accuse you of kidnapping your own sister. It was an error of judgment on my part. I also thank you for the part you played in assisting my team get out of this mess."

"Yes. I suppose I should also thank you for helping me finally stop the arranged marriage."

They all waited a moment, but the Prince said nothing further. "Well, are you?"

"I said I should. Whenever I think about doing it, I remember it was you five who blew my original plan to _heukil_, and then decide on not doing it."

Wally growled at the teenager's smug tone. "We're still gonna be watching you, _teenager_."

"Actually, now thanks to the arrangement I made with Numbuh Infinity, the Kids Next Door can no longer act in Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan without reporting to me. So _I _am watching _you_," Yul'sha smirked, giving a tiny bow before walking away. "May your next horizon give you enlightenment, Kids Next Door."

Yul'sha had left the four the simmer, but Yal'see had stayed behind. The princess was currently staring dead at Wally. The poor boy himself was beginning to get unnerved.

"Uh, listen, I guess I'm sorry about that stuff back at the fort," he slowly and awkwardly apologized. For once, he used his head, and opted to be _polite_ to the princess. Ugh, he hated that word. But he did not want to find out what would happen if you insulted a Ubekian Princess who just got out of a coma. "And I'm also sorry about getting ya in a coma, and er, pretending to be you for a while–but that coma bit wasn't my fault! And these guys forced me to wear that dress, so–"

The blond was silenced when the girl shocked them all by pecking Wally's cheeks. The boy lit up like a Christmas tree as the Princess smiled, bowed, then rushed to follow her elder brother, who had witnessed the display, and was cursing his sister's insane taste in boys.

Nigel blinked. "Interesting. You get a girl almost blown up, wear some of her dresses as disguises for a cover mission, and suddenly, she's all over you."

Wally's hand slowly found its way to the place Yal'see kissed him. He didn't know if he should feel honored, flattered, or grossed out. "Should I start worryin' about having to escape another wedding?"

"Wouldn't look too much into it, Casanova," Abby chuckled as she pat him on the back. "Coming out of the Brain Freeze Coma probably made the girl a lil loopy. She'll be back to hatin' your guts in no time."

Hoagie barely contained his chuckles as he awaited a certain reaction to Yal'see's very sudden act of PDA. "I don't know, what do you think, Numbuh 3? Uh, Numbuh 3?" Hoagie blinked, curious as to why the girl hadn't responded. He looked to where the girl was standing, and rolled his eyes as he saw what she was fawning over in her grasp. "Numbuh 3, where did you get that skunk?"

"It's _Wel'neda_, silly," Kuki softly cooed, tickling the supposed skunk-goddess in mortal form's underbelly. The little animal enjoyed the affection, and was very delighted at how Kuki didn't react negatively to her rather odorous smell. "I found her wandering outside the grounds, and she's sooo cute. Oh yes she is, _oh yes she is_! Can we keep her, Numbuh 1? Please?"

Nigel groaned aloud. "Numbuh 3, what have I told you about taking cultures' religious icons in as pets?"

"But I found out she IS related to Bradley! She's his fifth cousin twice-removed. It's probably been forever since they've seen each other!"

"Kuki," Nigel sternly lectured, "give the nice, crazy Ubekians their living goddess back. Right now."

"I think that would be wise," Numbuh 4-Below advised as she walked up towards the group, her hair down freely now that the mission was over. "As you have seen with the Rebels, our people are very sensitive about our religion."

"Aww. Spoil-sports."

Nigel ignored Kuki as he went to shake 4-Below's hand. "Numbuh 4-Below, I would like to personally thank you. Without you, we would have never gotten as close to Numbuh 4 as we did."

The blond rolled his eyes at how his leader was showering the dame with praise. "She didn't do a whole lot before. She didn't even have the cruddy courtesy to tell us she could speak English!"

Abby frowned. "She risked her life and job to help save you, fool. Be nicer!"

"Fine. Thank ya _ever so_ _much_ for savin' my life. I'm in your eternal debt and blah, blah, boring," Wally droned as she flapped his hands around. Finally fed up with how everything was getting so slow paced, he moved towards the back of the RV. "Geez, this thanking people crud is getting old. Hey Numbuh 2, my Yipper comics still in the trunk?"

Nigel pinched the bridge of his nose at his friend's behavior. "Please forgive Numbuh 4 for being, well, Numbuh 4. We've all had a rough night, he more so than the rest of us."

"I understand," Numbuh 4-Below curtly nodded. She then placed her hands together, and bowed gracefully before the team. "May your next mission bring you better tidings, Sector V. Despite watching my Honorable Princess get put in a coma, some of my country's most valued traditions getting exploited, and almost meeting the end of my life, it was a…" she gave a ghost of a smirk as she continued. "_experience_ working with you."

Hoagie wiggled his eyebrows. "A pleasant experience?"

"Don't push it."

"Aw, and here I thought we became good chums back in there," Hoagie dramatically spouted before chuckling. "Talk about a bad case of _cold feet_! Ha! Been waiting to use that one all night!"

Abby sighed as she tapped the boy upside the head with her cap. "Knock it off."

Numbuh 4-Below appeared ready to make another comment, but she sealed her lips when Numbuh Infinity made himself known. The atmosphere got thick as the operatives waited on baited breath for his response. Sure, he helped them in the heat of the moment, but now that everything was said and done, there was the matter of what transpired before the wedding incident took place.

Nigel was the first, as always, to break the ice. "Numbuh Infinity. Is your assessment finished?"

"Yes," Infinity shortly replied. "The Tipuans eluded an air of skepticism, but they were -overall- grateful for our 'efforts' to bring Mr. Boss' scheme to light. They've agreed to keep our treaty intact, but under a few stricter circumstances."

"Such as?"

"Too many things you field operatives wouldn't understand, but basically, we have to deal with watch-dogs now. Our sector is allowed to continue to operate in the area, but now all reports of our activity are fed to Yul'sha. He may have assisted us, but I can not honestly say I trust a teenager who has been given free reign to monitor our operations," he shook his head. "Still, I suppose it is better than losing access to this region completely. More importantly, Tasty Taste will never be a problem anymore. Ubekians have a long memory."

Hoagie dusted off his knuckles. "So I guess we managed to pull it off after all, wouldn't you say?"

Infinity sent the boy a chilling glare, and the effect was not ignored. "You'll be seeing what exactly I have to say soon enough. We managed to still retain foreign relations, so my report won't be as negative as previously intended, but you still have a lot to answer for," he said, his voice set like steel. "All of you."

"Great," Abby moaned, "dat's gonna be a load of fun."

"We've done all we can, team. For now, I suggest we get out of here. And leave that skunk behind!" Nigel snapped on Kuki, who froze in mid-pet of _Wel'neda. _"For Zero's sake, we must have already broken the record for international scandals and political incidents tonight. We don't need to push for one more, or else we risk going down in infamy for this sort of thing!"

At that moment, Wally's head reappeared around the corner of the RV, looking more bewildered than when he was asked to dress up as the princess. "Speaking of political incident thingys, someone mind explain' to me why the heck there's a naked adult in the back of the trunk?"

The rest of Sector V froze when they remembered the Ubekian official they stuffed in the RV. Hoagie shook his head as his shoulders slumped. They seriously couldn't catch a break today. "Somehow, we completely forgot about him."

"I was trapped in there for over an hour and I forgot about him," Infinity imputed, seemingly taking the new development in stride. Sector V could only conclude that the diplomat was in the middle of a nervous breakdown and this was simply how he reacted. "For a half-naked foreign minister, he's a terrible bore."

Abby, for the most part, stared long and hard at the RV. The insurmountable amount of disbelief present in her gaze was obvious from the next country over. After a long, silent minute, the girl shrugged, and reached for her pocket to pop a cherry lollipop into her mouth. "Figures."

Numbuh 4-Below shifted her eyes, then coughed into her hand as she gathered everyone's attention. "Well, uh, it has been a…_privilege _to work with you, Sector V," she said as she gave an awkward bow. The girl then slowly started backing away from the group. "But I must take my leave now, and go back to my comrades. Over there…before you end up killing our Chieftain." The girl then bolted, extremely intent on not having any involvement with the Sector V's vigorous attempts to bulldoze through KND-Ubekian relations.

And so the new revelations and surprises kept piling up as Numbuh Infinity just stared at the retreating operative as the obvious settled into his brain. "…they've been able to speak perfect English this entire time, haven't they?"

"Funny story, that. We'll share it later, look," Nigel stressed as he walked up to Infinity, placing two shaking hands on the diplomat's shoulders. "Infinity, this entire affair has boiled down to one step forward, a gazillion miles back. My team _barely _managed to salvage relations with Yal'see and the Ubekians, which is nothing short of a bloody miracle."

"Are you going to keep pointing out the obvious, or are you going somewhere with this?"

"What I'm trying to say is, after the heck we've all been through, my team can't afford to have any loose ends," Nigel spared a quick glance to the trunk, "on this mission. So you win. As our political expert, I submit your authority. All I ask is that you please tell us what to do now. You're the guy who smooths over these types of situations, so how do we make this problem go away without starting a war?"

"Oh, I see," Infinity frowned, his voice getting clipped as he went on. "You think that just because I'm a politician, I _must _know how to make 'dirty laundry' disappear. Because of course, all politicians must be conniving little usurers who always have some secret little agenda. Is that what you people think?"

Kuki tilted her head as she frowned at the kid. "So does that mean you can't do it or…"

"Of course I can! What do you take me for?" Infinity snapped back, seeming a bit insulted at their lack of faith. The sharp dressed boy wiped of his sunglasses, straightened his bow, then cleared his throat before he began giving out orders. "Listen very carefully. What we need to do is get in the RV and drive away like nothing happened. Once we get across the border, we're going to need a shovel, a bottle of hand lotion, that skunk, a gallon of orange paint, photo-shop, and this thing called the 'internet'…"

* * *

"…and that is why I think the country of Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan is one of the most interesting countries in the entire world," Wally finished, dropping his paper and looking out to his audience. He gave the entire classroom a smug gaze before turning to his beloved teacher. "And that's my report, Mrs. Thompson. I worked all night on it!"

The elementary school teacher blinked, her hands patiently folded across her desk as he gave the blond boy an leveled look. "…so allow me wrap up your report. The country you chose was Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan."

"Uh-huh."

"A country that's relatively unheard of, and whose economy is mainly centered around frozen treats and ice cream."

"Yep."

"And to top it all off, it's Prime Minister is a llama?"

"It's been working on that spitting problem," Wally felt he needed to point out. "Oh! I also studied how marriage works in their country too!"

"Yes, I'm quite aware. You were rather detailed about the part where they throw a dead turkey stuffed with dandelions and salmon into the crowd," she slowly muttered. After taking a deep breath, her brows knitted together as she regarded the young boy. "Well, I hope you're satisfied with yourself, Wallabee."

Wally was a little uncomfortable with her tone of voice. "Um, should I be?"

"Yes, you should, because you get an A plus!" Mrs. Thompson beamed as she took the report from the shocked boy's hands. "Never have I seen a more accurate and detailed report of a foreign country. Your findings were both a _hundred percent factual_ and respectful! I also like your choice in entries. My sister lives in Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan."

Wally was bouncing with excitement as his paper was handed back to him. He held it to his chest as he looked up to the teacher with the most puppy-dog face he could muster. "Thank you, Mrs. Thompson."

"Good work, Wally. Now head back to your seat," she shooed the boy off. She then went down her list as she called out the next student. "Tyler, it's your turn."

Wally walked back to his seat with his head held high. As soon as he made it back, he looked over to Abby, an ecstatic expression painted over his face as he all but shoved the paper into the girl's face. "Look at this, Numbuh 5! I got an A plus on my report!

* * *

"Numbuh 362!"

Rachel turned her look away from the expanse of space of the bridge of the moonbase and Numbuh 35 came rushing up to her with a panicked aura all around him. "What's wrong, Numbuh 35?"

"I-I just got news from our cover operatives on Earth," Bartie shakingly reported, dread filling in his features as he talked. "They've just informed me t-that Numbuh 4 got an _A plus on his report!_"

A look of horror broke out of Rachel's face as she staggered back at the news. The blonde then turned, leaning against the railing for support. After a moment, she controlled her features, and looked out towards space with a resigned expression.

"I knew this day would come," she uttered gravely. Standing tall, she turned back to Bartie as her voice became steel. "Prepare the Moonbase defenses. That armada of Flying Mutant Space Pigs will be here any minute!"

_"INTRUDER ALERT. INTRUDER ALERT."_

"THEY'RE ALREADY HERE!"

"Zero help us all," Rachel growled as she tore off her sweater, revealing her armor underneath. "Kids Next Door…BATTLE STATIONS!"

* * *

"Good job, sport," Abby nodded, cradling her own spotless report on Italy. She suddenly smirked, thinking back on their wild mission. "Nice to know our near botching up of foreign relations and helping Mr. Boss almost take over an ancient ice cream trading empire is improving your weighted GPA."

"I know, right?" Wally chuckled to himself as he took his seat. "'Bout time some of these crazy risks started paying off!"

Abby began laughing as well, but for an entirely different region. "So, does that explain why you're still wearin' the dress?"

Wally blinked, looking down at his outfit. Somehow, the blond boy was back in Princess Yal'see's royal wedding attire. It had taken a few favors to get access to it, but apparently, the Princess had shipped the clothing personally once she heard Wally was the one who requested them. He snorted, stubbornly turning away from Abby's teasing gaze. "Mrs. Thompson said we'd get extra credit if we wore something that looked like clothing from the country we did our report on. I need all the extra points I can get."

"C'mon, buddy. You can come clean with us," Hoagie suddenly popped in, speaking up from his desk directly behind Abby. "You're still wearing it because you think it makes you look pretty."

"Handsome! For the last time, it's _handsome_!"

"No outbursts today, Wallabee," Mrs Thompson sternly snipped, causing the boy to flinch back. "I'd hate to have to deduct points after you did so well. Now, Hoagie, you're up. And I swear, if you've somehow managed to make your report about the Wright Brothers again, you will fail this project."

"What? Naaaah. Have a little faith, Mrs. T," Hoagie smoothly chuckled as he waved her off. He hopped down from his seat, and walked towards the front of the class. However, he took his sweet time getting there, for he was secretly sweating trying to think of ways to make his report sound like it wasn't about the Wright Brothers and their first flight again.

The moment Hoagie reached the front, and nervously began reading off his report, Nigel walked in through the door. The Brit was the same as always, but there was a certain slouch to his step only his team noticed. He paused, handing a note to Mrs. Thompson. She nodded, satisfied, and shooed him off to his seat.

Abby watched as their leader sat down in his seat. Once he was settled, she leaned on her elbows and began her line of questioning. "What's eatin' ya, Numbuh 1?"

"Yeah," Wally piped in, "ya look like Numbuh 363 took all the good mission assignments."

"He might as well have," Nigel mumbled, pulling out a KND sealed parchment piece of paper. Written in the fanciest crayon known to kid-kind. "I just got this from Numbuh 86. It's reassignment orders, signed off by Numbuh Infinity himself."

Abby took the paper, reading over it herself. Once she finished, she sneered. "Oh, just great. We're stuck with Tolietnator Recon duty for next two months."

"That lousy suit-wearing nerd," Wally growled, slamming his fist into his desk. "I oughta give him a piece of my mind."

"Please don't, he's letting us off easy," Nigel tried in an attempt to deter Wally from his current, extremely violent line of thought. He then began to detail of how much it could be worse for them. "Numbuh Infinity is normally a kajillion times more harsher with his 'reassignment' punishments. Be thankful he didn't give us specialized tortures, or a mission involving the _beach_." The boy shivered at the thought of that horrible place.

"Guess so," Abby grumbled. She still didn't like it, but she could see Nigel's point. Still, one interesting part of the assignment caught her attention. "What's this about a 'special forces operative'?"

"Someone hand picked by Infinity to work alongside us. I'm assuming he or she is there to make sure none of us try to go AWOL."

Wally fidgeted a bit. "I got a bad feeling about this."

"Relax, Numbuh 4. Now's not the time to panic," Nigel pacified. "We just survived an onslaught of political fueled madness. What could possibly be worse than that?"

* * *

Far off, in a secluded location only a select few knew about, Numbuh Infinity sat at a polished desk, multiple forms of sheets and paperwork before him. The child worked diligently as he slowly processed them all, calculating all the variables and consequences that came with signing each one.

With the last paper filed away, he turned his attention to five important documents he had left to the side. They were in numerical order from one to five, and each held equally important data for him to consider. His hand hovered over one, before moving to the next one. After a moment, Infinity frowned.

"Knock knock!" came the reply from his door. Infinity peered upward, seeing Numbuh 74.239 entering the room. In his hands were two blurpurple slushies. "I brought you a slushie from deck five. These things are amazing! You need to try one."

"I just got back from the freezing, icy, and _slushy_ climate of Ubeki-beki-beki-stan-stan not even three days ago," Infinity slowly spoke, as if declaring the obvious. "Do you really think I want anything that would remind me of that trauma?"

"Sooo, is that a 'maybe'?"

"Ugh," he groaned, simply taking the refreshment from the boy. He had learned a long time ago that it was wise to just give in to Numbuh 74.239 when in references to such trivial matters. "Was there something you needed?"

"Just came up to–hey," the redhead paused, eyes widening as he noticed the five documents on the table. "Are those the–"

"Yes. They are."

"Wow. Shiny. They even have those plastic coats over them," 74.239 beamed, his fingers glossing over the documents' smooth surfaces. "Why can't I ever get these things? I bet if I covered all my paperwork with plastic, they'd finally get noticed at the front desk. Lousy Numbuh 9-2-5. _Illegible writing_. Bah! I don't have time to focus on making my handwriting neat, I have too much important science-ing to do!" He pulled his hands away before he irritated Infinity. It was an incredibly easy feat to accomplish. "So, which lucky one gets sent up for review?"

Infinity paused, closing his eyes in deep thought. Finally, he simply said, "All of them."

"What?" 74.239 seemed shocked. "I didn't even know we were allowed to..._all_ of them?"

"_All of them,_" Infinity stated with finality. He shuffled the five documents into one folder, sealed it, and placed it in the 'Out' tray. One little action that would make big waves. "Now, with that finally settled, what did you want?"

"Um," 74.239 took a moment to gather his thoughts. "Just wanted to let you know the agents checked in on that Ubekian official you said you wanted taken care of. That, and to say I have never felt more sorry for a skunk than I ever thought was humanly possible."

Infinity waved off his concerns. "Most of it was doctored footage. _Wel'neda_ was not harmed in the making of that particular video."

"You sure it'll be enough to keep his mouth shut about being locked up in a trunk after his clothes got stolen?"

"Please, the only other operative who could do a better smear job than me is Numbuh 10, and she only fixates her true efforts on Numbuh 60."

"I see. Well, what about the moonbase being attacked by those space pigs?" Numbuh 74.239 said, bringing up the elephant in the room. "Should we be worried about that?"

"No," Infinity calmly answered. "Space pigs are surprisingly susceptible to chemicals found in common egg yolk, and I arranged for new experimental egg based 2x4 weaponry to be shipped to the Moonbase yesterday. I am confident Numbuh 362 will connect the dots and have the matter contained and covered-up before lunch-time."

"Geez, you don't have to be all '_oh look at me, I make things happen in the shadows! Oooooooooh!' _about it, ya know," 74.239 whined.

"Are we finished?"

"Just one more thing. Sector V got their reassignment papers today, and I have to admit," he crossed his arm, shaking his head disapprovingly. "I'm kinda disappointed."

That took Infinity by surprised? "By _what_?"

"By you. Really? Toiletnator Recon duty? That's the best you can think of?"

Infinity's hand clasped themselves together as he thought over that particular piece of paperwork he signed off. Oh yes, he rather enjoyed that one. "I also arranged for a special forces operative to accompany them. That will quite the surprise."

"Why is that?"

"Because they'll be _surprised_ to find out the special forces operative is actually just Numbuh 13."

Numbuh 74.239 did a double take. "Numbuh 13? With Sector V on Toiletnator duty? I revoke my last statement. I am impressed. Why, the only way I could speculate you could worsen that is by somehow having the Toiletnator know they were on the way or something."

Infinity lightly smiled. "I may have let a piece of information or two slip his way…"

"Okay, I'm officially scared now," the boy hesitantly chuckled. "I kind of figured you were the type who was above 'vengeance' and all that."

"It's not vengeance, it's simply me testing their ability to act under overwhelming pressure."

"Right," 74.239 coughed. Starting to feel a tiny bit creeped out by his associate's ruthless calculus in matters of precise payback, the scientist decided it was high time to make himself useful elsewhere. Like the cafeteria. Yes, the cafeteria was the perfect place to take his wild notions of science and space-time multi-verse bang theory know-how and put them to ultimately questionable use. "If you need me, I'll be doing stuff. Awesome stuff! The kind of stuff that gets me noticed in the scientific field."

Infinity said nothing as he watched the operative leave the room. Once he was alone, the diplomat grasped the slushie Numbuh 74.239 had left, and turned his seat to face the back wall. The boy reached under the arm of his chair, and procured a slim, sliver remote. After the push of the button, the wall he was facing split open, revealing a massive plasma screen. The feed began to clear, and the image of the Toiletnator's trailer park lair was visible.

The lavatory themed villain was putting his war paint on. His toilet-roll masked face was shadowed by eerie candle lights, and he sat in a still position, praying to some sort of large golden porcelain throne before him.

_"Come for me, Sector V. My calling is the teacher, my body is the instrument, and you shall become the student. Come face me, and prepare to be forever…**flushed**."_

Infinity slowly slurped at his slushie in anticipation. If there was one thing he truly, truly prided himself on, it was his unfounded skills as a manipulator. Nothing went on that he wasn't already aware of.

Nothing what so ever.

"Oh, just remembered something," Numbuh 74.239 piped as his head poked in the doorway, "there was another security leak today, and as a result, your mother's here. Funny how that happens, huh?"

"ACHK HACK!" Infinity coughed, spewing his slushie everywhere. He ignored he the drink dripped down his now ruined suit as he rushed out of his office to play damage control. "You idiot! You told me you fixed that!"


End file.
